|Reviews for Second World|
| Lioness1988 chapter 99 . 10/6
Jolly good. I have thrououghly enjoyed this story, and look forward to catching up with the second book over the coming days. I apologize for not leaving more reviews, but as I was so far behind, I really didn't fell up to making inane little comments, and the various SPAG items I noted were easily understood.
I enjoy the pacing and the plot, and you have done a great job weaving the two tales together. The various subplots are very interesting too, and I like the change ups within chapters. The characters are believable, and I find it funny how well you've captured Evil!Dumbledore. I secretly hope Snape or Bellatrix will rise up at the critical moments and destroy him.
| seiho kentaro chapter 23 . 9/19
Hey, earlier you said that Charles died in Grindelwald war... just saying..;P
| pawn6252 chapter 100 . 8/28
Good story it will be interesting to see whare it will go in the sequel.
| gatodepatasblancas chapter 52 . 8/5
An observation here. The only one that looks like Bond, in the descriptions of the books is Timothy Dalton. The book said Bond look like Hoagy Carmichael (search for his image in google), but more cruel. May be Craig acts more like Bond, but that's the movie.
| angel de acuario chapter 100 . 7/27
Espero que Harry y Hermione sean paareja
| purrfus chapter 1 . 6/12
Read and read and read. I will go back and read it again more slowly, giving each chapter the attention it deserves and leave reviews - as long as you are not one of those authors who get upset with reviews on older stories - but I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed this story. The characters are nicely balanced and you supported the changes within the story, which is not easily done. Kudos.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 87 . 6/1
When is Narcissa visiting that Draco first says "I'm glad you could come for the holidays" then asks about her staying through Christmas and then asks for permission to visit a friend's family for Thanksgiving? If she's staying from Thanksgiving all the way through Christmas (and likely New Year as well) that's time enough for more than just "a little sightseeing". Even the most loving and dutiful of mothers would find it hard to find the time to be on vacation for a month and a half, especially when he's going to be spending most of that time in classes! Christmas and New Year is realistic. Thanksgiving and Christmas or Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year all in one vacation is not.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 68 . 5/31
You might want to put a warning on this chapter that there's something particularly gruesome within.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 65 . 5/31
The box should have contained a ring too, if they had discovered five.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 55 . 5/31
So did the house elf and Amelia just ignore the second body lying on the floor?
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 50 . 5/31
Regulus, not Reginald.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 46 . 5/31
Warmflash. Is she named after mild menopause?
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 45 . 5/31
You introduced some pretty icky plot points with James and Lily. I don't like it when writers mess around with who Harry's true parents were or their backgrounds. Call me emotionally invested in them as JKR wrote them. Usually, of course, it's because the writer wants to make Snape Harry's true father (ick) or wants to make Lily a pureblood descendant of Merlin and all the founders, etc. (ick ick). I especially don't want to read that Mr. Evans was sterile so Mrs. Evans was buggered by a neighbor, twice! With Mr. Evans' consent! (ick ick ick).
Beyond that, there are details that don't jibe:
Why does James require a guardian in seventh year? He's seventeen and therefore legally an adult already.
Lily's falling out with Snape happened at the end of their fifth year, not their sixth. It was the afternoon after their DADA OWL exam.
Why would Lily associate herself with the Marauders enough to discover a plot in the Potter family library if she hasn't fallen in love with Potter at least enough to be on good terms with him? She doesn't have access to the information that would glue their relationship together until after they are already together if it's in the Potter library.
If you discovered a conspiracy to remove the wizards from under the rule of the crown and you could see that your government was already independent of the crown for all intents and purposes, would you really approach one of the heads of that rogue government and expose your knowledge of the conspiracy? Wouldn't it make more sense to assume that anyone associated with that government was part of the conspiracy?
If you were paranoid enough to have paintings commissioned, why would you not also notify her majesty or her Muggle government right away? Having a portrait painted is presumably a laborious process, and fairly useless. It's much easier and more productive to write a letter and stick it in a Muggle post box. Heck, send an owl to Windsor castle or Buckingham palace. You definitely don't need to be of age to do that.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 43 . 5/31
Another subpar chapter that somehow escaped the attention of a beta.
| GodricGeoffreyGryffindor chapter 42 . 5/31
This chapter needs to be re-beta-ed.