Reviews for The Missionary
Guest chapter 35 . 10/20/2012
Great stuff! Some parts are a little tricky to follow, like when she trips; at that point she's on the ground in my head, but then she's up and falling. Also while all this is happening it feels like they're alone, in a street in the city. Perhaps mention some people gawking or what have you.

The passage "A vaguely familiar woman's voice cut him off. Lit. It was Lit." could use some exclamation, maybe.

But the story is very engrossing and mysterious!
alonsis 2 chapter 27 . 7/28/2012
Good story, still going strong and to everyone out there- WHY YOU NO REVIEW?

I like this story a lot. Kat is interesting as always.
T-SilverWolf chapter 22 . 7/17/2012
dood,this is really a good fic;however as I said before,your proof-reading needs lots of work... in particular, the proper term is "Zhentarim" not zentarim. hope you will take these suggestions and kindly give the previous chapters a quick once-over. also,does this story use 3.5 or 4th edition rules on magic and combat? some of the tricks your characters pull are not exactly according to realms canon. so,please kindly state if this story is an alternate universe fic.

To answer the above:

Hey there, first of all. :) Thanks for taking the time to read and review, I appreciate it, sincerely. I noticed the Zhentarim slip shortly after I posted it and then got busy doing other things so I couldn't come back to it.

I would -love- to find someone with the time and desire to go over this hunk of work and help me sort it out. Unfortunately, it's not likely to happen any time soon. After I finish writing all the chapters, I do plan on going back through and re-jigging them for pace and so forth- catch those little errors. However, grammar is my biggest (mechanical) problem at the moment. I'm putting a dedicated effort into improving that but it's going to take time, like anything.

As for 3.5/4th ed. . .

The combat is less important to me than the character's stories, however as I've kind of 'grown up' around 3 and 3.5 ed, I try to mimic that as much as I remember. However I'd love to know what you mean by the 'tricks' bit as if it is something I need to keep an eye out for, I'll gladly do so.

Again, thanks for taking the time to post some crits, I look forward to your reply :)
Guest chapter 22 . 7/17/2012
dood,this is really a good fic;however as I said before,your proof-reading needs lots of work... in particular, the proper term is "Zhentarim" not zentarim. hope you will take these suggestions and kindly give the previous chapters a quick once-over. also,does this story use 3.5 or 4th edition rules on magic and combat? some of the tricks your characters pull are not exactly according to realms canon. so,please kindly state if this story is an alternate universe fic.
pacificuser chapter 1 . 7/15/2012
dood,this is good,for a free fan fiction,this is good. However it seriously needs the love and dedicated attention of a proof-reader...
T-SilverWolf chapter 17 . 7/10/2012
So begins a new Volume. I hope those who're reading this enjoy the new style. I'm trying very hard to get better at this craft. :)
Guest chapter 1 . 7/4/2012
Alrighty, i've read this prologue and i must say that i quite like it, even though i'm not a fan of high fantasy or dungeons and dragons books.
I really find the character descriptions very good and i can almost picture them infront of me. The characters also have some depth and you get interested about who they might be.

If i get some more spare time i'll gladly continue reading. Keep up the good work!
alonsis 2 chapter 10 . 4/30/2012
Hm...sensual display of setting and interaction, a subtle hint of foreshadowing, and playful suggestive moments abound.

I like.

The sphinx is neat, btw. And I can totally agree with Kat about being out of her depth.
alonsis 2 chapter 9 . 4/22/2012
Love it. Moar plz. Can't find fault.

It can be new chapter tyme soon?
alonsis 2 chapter 8 . 4/18/2012
Climb girl! Climb!

the first half is a little confusing, but I'm pretty sure thats by design. She's dreaming then...reality begins to take over.

I like the air of suspense towards the end.

Also, come on people! Review!
alonsis 2 chapter 6 . 4/14/2012
HAHAHAH! I love it! Would have preferred to see her take the guy out, but I'm vengeful like that.

Great chapter and a good note to end the volume on.
alonsis 2 chapter 5 . 4/13/2012
Ouch. Very..painful sounding towards the end, but I like this chapter.
alonsis 2 chapter 4 . 4/11/2012
I approve. 1 cool for this chapter.