|Reviews for The Fifth Forman|
| Guest chapter 1 . 2/23
It's a little strange that someone else is saying Jackie's lines. It seems like you aren't so much writing Jackie as Eric's sister, but instead just giving Eric a random sister who happens to be called Jackie's name, and changing the real Jackie's name to Pam. I am going to try a few more chapters, but I'm nervous that Jackie is going to be a Mary Sue.
| Guest chapter 1 . 9/29/2013
So, what, if some of the scenes are directly from the show? I enjoyed this to an extend. This is one of those fanfictions, I can read- over, and over; and still cry, over the little things, even laugh. Ugh. You're an amazing writer. :)
| Guest chapter 18 . 7/16/2013
I totally love how you wrote this. It was a really great story and you are an excellent writer. This is one of my fav stories that I have read on here! :)
| Guest chapter 17 . 5/30/2013
I am not a fan of Jyde, but you really did a wonderful job with this story, and the character dialogue wasn't OOC like most of the other fanfics.
The only mishap was that Hyde seemed a bit more jealous in anger; he doesn't show much of his emotions. He's more emotionally stable and knows how to use them at the right time. Thus, his character dialogue in this story was a bit out of hand, considering that he gets jealous way too easily, or at least reveals his emotions at unnecessary times.
I also would conclude that he's too mushy with Jackie- in the series, he's shown to actually care for her without being too mushy.
In conclusion, the characters were very well played out, especially Kitty and Eric.
And you actually developed Jackie's character by toning down on her bitchiness as well.
I love the alternate timeline twist, it's very incredible and pretty accurate. You really did a great job! xx
| tsevca chapter 2 . 3/15/2013
to react on your comment at the beginning. you cant expect the same amount of reviews to your poetry as you get to this.
first i really liked the idea but you practicly write almost everything that happens on the show, sentence by sentence, only you make tiny changes, so jackie is erics sister and everyone likes her. it gets boring really quickly for someone who watched the show.
p.s.: there is no way laurie would like jackie, especially since you made her reds favourite child.
| LedZepGrl chapter 4 . 3/7/2013
Still loving this! I literally laughed out loud when Kelso was burned about taking an hour to describe a half hour Scooby Doo episode!
| LedZepGrl chapter 1 . 3/7/2013
Just read the first chapter and love where you are going with this! I can't wait to read all te chapters - I'm hooked!
| Guest chapter 18 . 10/26/2012
This was a really great story. I am sorry you aren't going to write a sequel but I also understand. The story had a solid ending and you can't just rewrite every episode to include some Jackie/Hyde. And if you feel the story was in a good place to end then you should end it. Don't write a sequel just because other people want you to, it wouldn't be as great as this because you weren't inspired.
I don't have a fanfic account but this story will definitely be bookmarked. Great job I really enjoyed this story. I'll check back in on you every once in a while to see if you've written a one shot or something. Fantastic job :D
| Guest chapter 17 . 8/25/2012
| Guest chapter 17 . 8/18/2012
You really should do a sequal! You're an excellent writer. :)
| Guest chapter 1 . 8/4/2012
Oh no no no. This is so...NO! Why? Why would Jackie e we be seen as a Forman? It just doesn't make any sense! There's no way she could have been the same Jackie and so Hyde would never have fallen in live with her. From what I've read she's not even Jackie she's a Mary Sue character and those are the worst. I will not be reading more of what u can only imagine us another Hyde OC story but with the OC disguised as Jackie.
| Guest chapter 17 . 7/30/2012
Awww loved the ending...you should definitely do a sequal:)
| texican2436 chapter 17 . 7/30/2012
that was a great ending, not surprised that their night ended together like that, so great that he said it at the end.
a sequal would be nice, love the way you wrote these two.:)
| Guest chapter 17 . 7/18/2012
Such a cute story!
| LoveNLearn chapter 17 . 7/18/2012
Great ending and the story overall was fantastic! Glad you liked my suggestion for a possible sequel too. Can't wait for what else you have to share. Also, I'm thinking about writingmy first story soon. It'll be a one-shot song-fic. All Summer Long by Kid Rock. I hope you read it and review when I post it which might not be for a while. Keep up the stories. Peace and Zennie Love!