|Reviews for Coming Back|
| Snape6 chapter 1 . 7/7/2014
The repeating 'he deserves it' makes it feel like Remus is trying to convince himself that he hates Sirius. I wonder if he would feel like that or whether Sirius getting James, Peter and Lily killed (which he thinks Sirius has done) would have made Remus really hate him.
I like a piece of writing that makes me think! :) And I liked the way you've written Remus' tone, retrospective, calm, and slightly self-critical, which really works IMHO. My favourite thing though is the way Remus slips into second-person perspective, so in his internal monologue he is addressing Sirius directly, and then forces himself to stop it, to back away and return to first person. Emotionally conflicted - as JKR said on Pottermore Remus had 'grave doubts'. Loved it. :)
| Homeskilletbiscuitstirfryson chapter 1 . 5/9/2012
I thought this was a really cool story. You pulled off writing in the first person really well and were able to capture so much in such a short amount of time. The thoughts seemed realistic and the confusion and betrayal you portrayed was great. The one thing I found myself wishing you'd shown is the madness you talk about. "This way madness lies." He's obviously been down that road before and to hear more about it, see a glimpse, even, might have given a better sense of where he is now.
Overall I really enjoyed the story, and I think you should check out this creative role playing site called Rocky Mountain International (www. rmimagic .com). It would be really great to have a writer like you there. Our new term is starting up soon, and we're accepting applications for new students. I hope you get a chance to check it out. Keep writing!
| Minna26 chapter 1 . 4/29/2012
I really like this story! :) Its nice to have an insight to Lupin's thoughts...Well done! :)
| anonymous aussie chapter 1 . 4/21/2012
Beautiful. I particularly lives the ending, it was great. I think you perfectly captured the feelings of Remus-it was enjoyable and heartbreaking to read. You are a very gifted writer
| keeptheotherone chapter 1 . 4/17/2012
Ahh, I love this! And you did present tense too! I totally believe this happened, and that's the best kind of missing moment :) My favorite part is the way you used the repetition of "he deserves it" to illustrate Remus's mixed feelings. Wonderful job!
Thanks for entering :D
| 93 Diagon Alley chapter 1 . 4/17/2012
Awwww. Poor Remus :(
| silverbirch chapter 1 . 4/16/2012
Very good, and better because you had him accepting what had happened as the truth.
| Rheta chapter 1 . 4/15/2012
Loved it! I love your interpretation of Remus.
| alix33 chapter 1 . 4/15/2012
| excessivelyperky chapter 1 . 4/15/2012
Sirius didn't mind setting Lupin up to take the fall if Snape had ended up dead (oh, those happy schooldays!). That should have been Remus's first clue.
And if anyone from Hogsmeade had been in the way during those charming full-moon romps, well, sucks to be them.
But since Sirius turned out to be innocent of what happened to the Potters, then that part didn't matter, especially since Harry hated _Snape_ for daring to try to protect the school.
Nice vignette of what Remus might have thought.
| Rose of the West chapter 1 . 4/15/2012
You captured the sense of betrayal from Sirius so well. It's hard to imagine what Remus must have thought for years, before learning the truth.