Reviews for Sacrifice
Charles RocketBoy chapter 1 . 4/11/2004
Pretty good! Though I doubt Dot ever expected Enzo to really stay in Game Sprite mode- I think she just wanted him to be safe while the thing with Daemon went down.
dotfan452 chapter 1 . 8/21/2002
Your story was mediocre at best. I'm sorry but I thought it read more like a Transcript than an actual fic. Sentences like "Bob rolls his eyes." and "Dad waves to Enzo and Slash picks him up, carrying him away to the approaching cube." read more like a Movie Script or Stage directions than an actual short story. I don't even think it qualifies as a short story, shorts stories have to have a plot this story barely has one, if any. I think the ficlet would have been much better if it had been written in third person and not first. Even though you were trying to capture Dot's thoughts I don't think first person was the way to go. As I said before it read more like a script Mainframe would give the Voice actor than an actual fic. I think your fic would have been much better in third person than first and I think it would have been nice if you had extended the beginning of the scene instead of beginning right where the actual scene in the episode started. It needed something original besides Dot's thoughts. On the upside, your grammer and spelling are great. Now if you fix the other flaws I think it could be a great ficlet and not a mediocre transcript.
Rebecca Hb chapter 1 . 5/30/2002
'Bob and I watch it fall and I feel like a monster.'

Awww... Poor Dot. She had to make some tough decisions in S4 and no one congratulated her on what she tried to do. She's the one who insured that the Mainframers would win, however accidently.

'We die, I think, or we get infected, and either way, I’ll never see you again. But I can’t tell you that, because if I do, you’ll never go.'

Yes, Dot knows what she's doing. She knows how to handle people. Listen to her, Mainframers! Comfort her!

'While mentally screaming that if he doesn’t like it, why can’t he come up with his own plan? I’m doing all I can and why can’t someone else take over?'

Poor Dot...

Excellent story, Ryuu!
trisanamcgraw chapter 1 . 5/29/2002
Ryuu, this was awesome! Great look through Dot's eyes in this situation, and you added some of her own thoughts that helped to further explain the **absurdity** of sending her brother into the Games...
WebMistressGina chapter 1 . 5/29/2002
Ryuu...Thank you. It makes some semblance of sense now, because I think we all know Dot Matrix was NOT about to go through what she did with Matrix all over again. I think I even screamed out her. lol

Great job!
177223 chapter 1 . 5/29/2002
This is great! Sacrifice was the only Daemon Rising episode I saw; Good job!