|Reviews for Wisp|
| Birddy chapter 63 . 8/2/2016
This story was so good and I'm sad to see it end. There were a lot of parts of it where even I had to stop for a moment or skip past certain graphic parts because they were a little too much, but all in all great story.
| stephanie.j.daw chapter 2 . 7/23/2016
Very well written chapter. xxxx
| stephanie.j.daw chapter 1 . 7/23/2016
I did not see that coming. xxxx
| Miss Laura Padfoot chapter 9 . 6/21/2016
I mistakenly posted the review before I had finished it. I was going to say that there were many other things I didn't like on it... For example, a story like yours could be much better if it focused on women saving this other woman... Something from Rosalie's, Alice's or Esme's point of view could have been much more emotional and truer.
I honestly don't know how old you are nor your position on feminism. And I usually don't write reviews even though I read a whole lot of fanfics (this is my first one in more than 5 years). But the whole approach you had really threw me off in such a way that I felt as if I needed to say something. Bella's story could be a story about overcoming this traumatic experience, because she is a strong woman full of potential... But it feels like it going to be a story about a girl being saved and falling in love with her savior, almost like a Disney princess movie, but with much more angst.
Please don't take anything I said badly. I honestly think you can write beautifully, it is really had to come across people who write in a way you feel like you wanna read more, more and more until it's finished and then some more. And, if I'm telling the truth, I really felt like I should keep reading your story, but I was just becoming really frustrated with the way things were going.
| Miss Laura Padfoot chapter 8 . 6/21/2016
Man, I really wanted to give this fanfic a try... I mean, it has so many reviews it ought to be good, right? You can write, don't get me wrong, the story is extremely well written, but its content is deeply disturbing.
Okay, James is a vile kidnapper/rapist/abuser. Unfortunately there are many people like this in the world... But I really don't like the way you portrait the good guys. The Cullens are kind, but more important (in this case) well educated people.
You find a corpse (or someone who appears to be dead), you get scared as hell of course, but you call 911 not a relative who is a doctor. You at least try to see if the person is alive! You want this stranger person to be taken care of by professional people with access to everything they need! Okay, Carlise is a doctor okay, but he doesn't have access to everything he needs (and what kind of doctor is he btw?).
But okay, you don't call 911, you keep this stranger girl who was clearly abused at your place. Why don't call Esme to help?! You don't wanna bother her in the middle of the night so you have a guy bath a girl who was abused? The scene would have been much more sensible if a woman had bathed Bella. As a woman, I really empathized with Bella in a way that no man can empathize.
And then the way Edward acts towards her, like she is fascinating, saying she is adorable, saying that she amazes him! WTF? SHE AMAZES HIM? Bella's situation and behavior did not amaze me, they horrified me, they made me utterly said. A human being in that situation should "amaze" no one! I'm sorry, but I think Edward's behavior is super creepy...
And then, you have Jasper who is a doctor freaking out because they are taking her to a psychiatric hospital. Of course they should take her to a psychiatric hospital! Of course she should be monitored by professionals! Psychiatric hospitals are not anymore seen as a place where only "crazy" people go. The Cullens certainly would know that... And the fact that the psychologist is portrayed as heartless makes everything much more surreal.
I don't really know how you will develop this bond you created between Edward and Bella. I hope it does not evolve to a romantic relationship. Bella was emotionally traumatized - she was sexually, mentally and physically abused. I don't think anyone really recovers from that kind of trauma...
I could criticize it even more
| evoldrawdereverof chapter 63 . 5/30/2016
I absolutely loved this story. It was incredible! Probably the best story on this site. Great job, seriously, what a great job.
| Drea chapter 6 . 5/19/2016
Gotta say, you took it too far with the tub crap. Who gets naked with a girl who has been raped and is mute and basically a child? Who has her touch her all over her body and wash her hair? That whole chapter was really weird. I like your story idea and where you are going, but hopefully you don't take this repeatedly to this weird place that is not only not ok, but uncomfortable and oddly fetish-y. No one who wasn't a perv would do that in real life.
| Where is outtake chapter 68 . 5/6/2016
Are you going to keep promise to write an outtake? You took my hard earn money, if you can't keep the promise then, you should refund money to everyone.
| kalibean chapter 63 . 5/8/2016
Such a wonderful story, and I'm glad I got over my fear of too much angst to read it. You did a great job of giving information and keeping it compelling without sinking into despair, which I appreciate. And knowing you've struggled so much with your own despair whilst writing this is all the more commendable. I hope that you've found some peace. I understand the struggle.
| SavyGrace chapter 63 . 5/4/2016
Lovely story. Heartbreaking but hopeful. Thank You.
| SanguineTaurean chapter 64 . 5/2/2016
Since I'm reading this so much later I do hope people helped your friend. That's just so sad. I hope their lives are now better.
| SanguineTaurean chapter 63 . 5/2/2016
I hate to see this end. Bella struggled so much in her youth, and always will. The uncertainty of those horrid spawns still out there, the scars from them on her inside and outside...but she did win in a way and had such loving people surrounding her. It is sad to me that she and Edward made choices that really don't seem fair to him because he is such a loving sweet man, that he isn't married to her nor having children because it has to hurt him deeply, even though he loves Bella and will do anything to keep her happy. I just feel really sorry for him because, once again, he is putting someone else ahead of his feelings, wants, and fulfillment.
| SanguineTaurean chapter 62 . 5/2/2016
Sheesh! It is a good think the cat was chipped and Bella really didn't know how to drive or she never would have been found.
| SanguineTaurean chapter 61 . 5/2/2016
THAT FVCKING BEOTCH! I loathe Tanbitch even more than before. And the tsunami hits.
| SanguineTaurean chapter 60 . 5/2/2016
With all of the safety precautions in a hospital I can't fathom how the baby was stolen...unless it was an inside job. Plus they are in a small town so it wasn't as locked down as one in a larger city. Damn. This is not good.