|Reviews for Framed|
| bigblukrew chapter 21 . 1/24
Another great story man. Had me guessing for most of the it. The ending sorta kinda made me think of the ending to Goodfellas. I also got a Usual Suspects vibe throughout the story. For your first foray into mystery, this was pretty good. I reckon I'll read Immortal enemies next. See ya there. Btw, you haven't seen A Knight's Tale?! Lol
| a123b chapter 1 . 4/1/2013
nosebleeds, always breaking the tension.
| Cottoncandy101 chapter 16 . 1/11/2013
Yay Piccolo! :D
| jsoon500 chapter 21 . 9/30/2012
i liked this mystery story, not much of a thriller though, from the way the narrative was written, but you gave it a good vibe of a sherlock holmes story. in many ways it was similar to the movies starring Robert Downy Jr.
i liked that there was major plots twists here and there that kept me guessing. i didn't realise who the culprit was until the end.
however, i thought that this was not as good as immortal enemies though.
for one you left the readers in the dark about all the evidence in the "file" that gohan passed to goten. i dun get the epic feeling of "busting a major crook" at the end when she was caught. i felt that you could have dropped sublte hints about videl's misdoings through the story and then let us realise those clues pointed to the culprit. her change from protagonist to antagonist was too sudden.
one of the major plot twists was the federal investigation portion. i dont like the fact that a major plot point happened behind the scenes and there was no hint about it at all until he revealed it with a monologue/flashback. it could be credited to his great acting skills, but as a reader, it makes me feel a sudden detachment from the character whereas the earlier chapters helped us to build a closer relationship with him already.
one thing i liked about both Immortal Enemies and this story is that you develop the characters very very well, and you feel very close to them. in this story, the side characters, especially goten, were done very well, and the main characters gohan and videl were done extremely well at first... until the middle part of the story where the sudden plot twists happen, and its like we don't even know them anymore.
you also could have tied up some loose ends about the details of videl's underground activities, and maybe her trial? you could always leave this open ended for readers like in your other stories.
lastly, ms westingham seems like a fairly sinister character if i'm not wrong. i feel there's something about her that you are not telling us, something about the bracelet. you could make a sequel parhaps? or maybe i just have something for the gorgeous evil lady with maicious intent hehe
but that being said, this story is a marvellous AU story. not a fan of AUs, cos most of them have stupid plots and have aboslutely nothing to do with dbz, but your stories always keep me hooked.
this story's ending was not as open-ended as the one in immortal enemies though, and thats a plus. cos open ended endings just leave a hole in the concrete resolution to the story i was looking for. (like in IEs, gohan's mother subplot went unresolved :/)
Here's a pat on the back for a job well done!
| Aleaster chapter 21 . 9/3/2012
Great story! I just don't understand by gohan said shell be out in no time. Is there some nuance I'm missing? The death penalty? Whatever it is, I really liked this story and your other work on the site. Keep it up!
| Jfmam chapter 21 . 8/19/2012
Sad to see this story end.
I haven't read your other AU stories yet, so when I started reading this, I was unsure how it would go. My concerns were groundless however, so I definately will be reading your other AU stories as well.
| TheGodfather93 chapter 21 . 8/7/2012
Wow. I never knew you could write mystery so well. Just when I thought I had figured one thing out, you come in with a completely unexpected twist. At first I thought you weren't making the best use of the DBZ characters' actual personalities, and were just using their names, but as the story progressed I realized that they were, for the most part, largely in character. I also love the DBZ style humour you put in despite it being a crime story. In any case, this was a great read, and I'm looking forward to your next story. Although I do hope it's a bit more DBZ-esque in its nature, much like Battle Stain and its sequels.
| jimthebear2 chapter 21 . 8/5/2012
Hurt my brain so much, I loved it!
| LadyLaide chapter 21 . 7/26/2012
My final review for Framed... *sheds tear*
NOT! At last the mindfuckery is over with an oh-so-sweet end! Videl's going to rot in jail, Vegeta's free & is now a little more reputable and Gohan is free too...(not that I didn't wish he went down too -_-)
But...I don't think you should say T-boning again... I totally got the wrong idea and my eyes were like this O_O lololol
Loved Vegeta as usual! His threats & quick retorts are always a joy to see :D
Definitely liked seeing Krillin being Krillin and forgetting where his keys were lol, it was a little strange seeing him so serious for so long and not doing something stupid... You know my opinion on him already XD
*takes a moment to reminisce on the highs and lows of Framed*
Okay... okay.. I admit it. It's a little sad to see this story go... :(
Thanks for giving me peace of mind & a happy ending :D
Lots of hugs and a couple kisses (you would have got more if this story wasn't such a mindfuck XD)
Signed, the one and only, LadyLaide xxx
| Dbzlover500 chapter 21 . 7/23/2012
Aww, it's over! But like they say, all great things must come to an end. Nice work, I can't wait to see all the other stories you will be writing!
| dbzfan8 chapter 21 . 7/23/2012
It's over o.O That seemed quick. Needless to say, I figured Gohan and Videl weren't going to get together in this story. So it was Tien and Yamcha that hit Videl, or did I completely miss who it was? Interesting how Gohan become the Westinghams, I could see Krillin doing that. Well, I guess that's all I have to say, so I'll see you next time you total your car...I mean post a story.
| Death101- Fox Version chapter 21 . 7/23/2012
Nicely done. I especially loved the ending with the talk between Goten and Gohan. The last line was the best. Anyways, I look forward to your next work. Please update soon!
| Anonymous Void chapter 21 . 7/23/2012
And so this one comes to an end. Ironic that Videl was broadsided by Tien and Yamcha but shouldn't she have sustained more injuries from it? It's a miracle she isn't dead!
You need to work on your journalism skills. Where a person is named in an article, their whole name, first and last, are always mentioned the first time their name appears. While there are very few if only one person who goes by the name Vegeta, his first or last name should have also been put into that article. Even the President of the United States, when first mentioned in an article, has his first and last name written out. The only exceptions are minors or when a scientific study in mentioned in which case only the last names are written with the year of the study,
I can see Krillen losing/forgetting his keys. That and an owned count when it gets pointed out where they are. See you again with your next story.
| dbzfan8 chapter 20 . 7/22/2012
Wow, that sure was an interesting scene in the beginning with Tien and Yamcha, but not as interesting as the part with Videl, Vegeta, and Gohan! They certainly did not plan for that to happen, but it looks like it still works out for the taskforce. Now I'm left to wonder who crashed into her car...I bet it was Goten. You can count on him to do something stupid. I love coming back from camping to awesome chapters .
| LadyLaide chapter 20 . 7/22/2012
WHAT HIT HER? -_- Really Shadow? A cliffhanger? -_-
Hang on... where was Frieza? o_o Did I just skip by it completely x_x
And I love how Vegeta got so mad in this _ my darling's anger is always a pleasure to see! I loved the threats too and did laugh at the moles can't see part XD