Reviews for Fury Within Her
cutiepie23 chapter 6 . 9/22/2014
If you really want to make it a good fic but some lemmen in it ,make m tingle,example:yeah mona you like that huh?;ohh raphiel you so stronge [XD] ; shit the f#ck up and FUCK ME!
Guest chapter 29 . 6/9/2014
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Guest chapter 1 . 6/7/2014
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Babyspitfire123 chapter 14 . 3/13/2014
So... SAD *cries*
Skerdi Kat chapter 1 . 12/23/2012
I like the idea of Mona being a little more violent and revenge-bound (even if I tend to write her as a spirited, optimistic "nice girl"), especially toward the people responsible for her mutation, so I'm curious to see how this plays out.

However, for me personally, there's something... off about the writing style, if that makes sense. Gore doesn't bother me in the slightest, but grammar and punctuation errors drive me up the wall and I noticed a LOT of them here. You seem rushed, like you were trying to get this out ASAP. Trust me, I know what it's like to finish a chapter and have the burning desire to publish it RIGHT THEN AND THERE OMG. I also noticed you have a tendency to use a lot of the same words in close vicinity.

All in all, I love, love, LOVE this concept, and I think this story would greatly benefit if you and maybe a friend read over it again to tweak the writing style. It's a shame to have simple, easily-fixed errors distract from what could potentially be an amazing story. :)

Skerdi.
Jashinsangel0521 chapter 1 . 7/10/2012
awsome story
shadrougeforever chapter 52 . 7/10/2012
Good job, Dev! I'm really impressed here! You kinda make me wanna take more interest in TMNT cause you wrote the fic so well! Again this fic was brilliant! :)
Guest chapter 52 . 7/9/2012
wooooooooooooooooooooow very cool a sequel!
Guest chapter 52 . 7/9/2012
I'm sooooooooooooo sorry I didn't review!
I loved the party! I loved every song!
Awww! Raphie and Mona were about to kiss! Until that drunkard ruined it X(
They murdered the last of Mona's rapists! Whats gonna happen now?
Wah! Mona really is turning into the ninja we all don't wanna mess with :')
Yay! Mona passed! Oh happy days!
Awwwwww... Poor Leo! :'(
He deserves love!
And what's this? A sequel? And Shredder's involved? AWESOME!
Can't wait to read it!
Like always, an amazing story! Hurry up with the sequel!

Ayano
Wonderwomanbatmanfan chapter 52 . 7/8/2012
I can't wait lol. Please upload soon :D
Rirureddo chapter 52 . 7/8/2012
Very amazing story Devina! I've loved TMNT ever since I was a kid and this is without a doubt the best TMNT story I've read! I read and reviewed every chapter and loved it every step of the way! You truly outdid yourself with this one and can't wait to see more of your stories in the future! Awesome job! :D
Rirureddo chapter 51 . 7/8/2012
Aww, how sweet and adorable! I loved this chapter so much! Raph and Mona are officially together and it was done so beautifully! But poor Leo, his heart is in pieces! Wonder what he is to do after all this! Great chapter Devina! Awesome job! :D
Guest chapter 51 . 7/7/2012
Woohoo! Way to go Raphie boy!

Poor Leo though, I hope he's going to be okay. Kinda makes you hope that Leo himself will find a mate of his own some day.

Anyways, great job as always Bloodrayne666. I've read a lot of your fanfiction (especially the Sonic ones) and I was absolutely squealing with joy when you started a TMNT fanfic and a Raph X Mona one at that! I adore TMNT and the couple so I was pretty excited to see one of my favourite authors write a story about this. The chapters, while not overly lengthy, are well-written and leave the reader wanting more. I'm proud to say that this is the best Raph X Mona fanfic I have ever read.
While I have not reviewed on every single chapter, I have stuck with this story ever since chapter one was published. I can't wait for the final chapter to see what happens, and how Leonardo will deal with this.
Great romance scene by the way, it seemed very cute and natural... You didn't do ok.. You did AWESOME! :)
Wonderwomanbatmanfan chapter 51 . 7/7/2012
Aww, poor leo. I feel bad for him :( Please update soon :D
RaphaelsSis1 chapter 51 . 7/7/2012
Yaaay! But poor Leo, he must feel horrible!:( It was the perfect scene!:D

They're all so nosey!:)

Cant wait for the next chapter!
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