|Reviews for Edward Versus the Board of Education|
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/17/2014
| Avendesade chapter 1 . 4/11/2014
What a quaint (in an interesting and pleasant way) piece of fiction you have here. I love the historical (if I may be permitted to use that word for fairly recent history) aspect that is built into this story. Sometimes you forget where the Cullens' came from, and how they are not truly the group of modern day highschool students we see portrayed in the movies. You captured the era well. "Like he could ever be as cool as a Beetle." - Very funny. I laughed out loud. :)
Interesting Carlisle/Edward interaction, as usual. I found Carlisle to be especially paternal and reasonable in this piece, and Edward really seemed like a kid who just got in a fight at school. Hearing Carlisle tell Edward not to "despise his discipline" right before whipping him gave me genuine chills. I really felt for both of them.
This whole story had realness to it, and a very believable, almost 'normal' quality. Maybe it was simply the fact that placing them in a time that more suited their values seemed to make them less supernatural (I'm not really sure what word I'm looking for there)... It really showed them to be a regular functioning family, just trying to make it day by day with their situation in life.
I really enjoyed taking the trip this story invited me on, and I'm going to be paying a lot closer attention to socks from now on. ;)
| Shawna chapter 1 . 1/22/2014
Great one-shot! Loved every word! Wonderful story! Keep up the good work!
| crotia chapter 1 . 12/1/2013
| AlsoRecliningHorizontally chapter 1 . 7/12/2013
Jesus Christ, this was pure awesomesauce! You practically had me in hysterics, and I was shaking with pent up laughter as to not disturb my boyfriend.
All the A.S.S stuff was too freaking funny - the part with the couch reeking of vomit and A.S.S absolutely hilarious!
You have an amazing way with words! This was so well written and entertaining :)
| SunniGummi chapter 1 . 1/13/2013
Ah, this story is brilliant!
I have no clue how I manage to miss so many awesome stories!
Loved the initials of that bloke, ASS ;-)
Oh, what a lovely day for Edward ... ASS cannot stop provoking him, ASS tries to punch him and breaks his other hand ... and then - when he can finally get away from him - the coach walks him to the principal's office with the sickening smell of ASS and vomit all over him. Yay.
The principal's office ... oh my. I'm pretty sure the other students were grateful that that big-ass paddle was no more (if only for a little while), but it made Edward's day decisively worse. Carlisle needs a faster car, that's all I can say.
Oh, Emmett LOL ... he cannot take anything seriously, now can he? But that's him all over.
Really enjoyed the story, thank you so much for sharing!
(Oh, I think my Dad is wearing grey socks ... what does that make him? Something ... in between? *scratches-head* Half-dork, hahaha!)
| Phoenixhp5 chapter 1 . 12/29/2012
oh edward, always letting your temper get the best of you, haha! found the image of the paddle breaking against his backside pretty hilarious. nice job!
| Cumor chapter 1 . 10/16/2012
Excellent story. I've always know that it was a bad idea to take a paddle to a vampire, but never considered what sort of damage it could do to the disciplinarian. Also, love the author's note. Yes, they do rock their black socks. *grins*
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/25/2012
Ass. Haha ..Worst initials ever.
| tarablackthorn chapter 1 . 5/5/2012
Excellent story! I love the irreverent, off-beat way you write from Edward's perspective. I laughed all the way through this, especially the parts about Anthony Scott Sinclair's "red ASS shining brightly under the fluorescent lighting," and where Edward noted that the principal's paddle "looked big enough to row a boat." I thought of one thing that could've been added: Where Edward thought "my ass was grass, as they would say," would be to finish the expression with, "and Carlisle was the lawnmower." Do write more; this is great stuff, very funny!
| Jingle For Goldfish chapter 1 . 5/2/2012
I love your characterization of Edward. You've pegged my impression of him—he's normally cool and collected, but he does experience the occasional loss of temper. I've always figured it was harder for the others to keep his cool, knowing what was going on in everyone else's head. He must want to strangle everyone he interacts with. I liked that his outburst was comparatively mild, and it was more a case of not knowing his own strength than unbridled rage that got him in trouble. It seemed very real to his character. And I love authoritarian Carlisle. The actual books could have used more of him, IMHO. Great story!
| TwilightMusicLife93 chapter 1 . 5/2/2012
Awesome story! Please write more 1-shots like these I really enjoyed it!
| sisterglitch chapter 1 . 4/30/2012
I fear your assumption - that adolescent males were as crude and cruel in the early Sixties as they are today - is true. With my non-slash Twilight hat on, I just groan to think of the teasing a prudish oddball like Edward must have suffered from his “peers” in those decades upon decades of high school. If I were Edward, I would have rebelled. I would have refused the pretense of highschooldom and just alienated myself from the stupid humans. Better to be feral. But then... sigh... there would be no Bella… would there?
When we were that age, we didn’t conceive of our teachers’ and principals’ private thoughts and private lives. Later as adults we realize they were the usual mix of assholes and angels. Thanks for taking me right back to the halls of my High School, with the sordid memories of tenth grade, awkward, angry, antisocial… a pimple on the face of humanity. When sex was a vague and hovering and confusing threat…
Thanks for the black sock/white sock tutorial! I shall never look at men’s socks the same way again. In fact, I may now become a sock-stalker as I do my own personal survey. Thank God for another pasttime to keep me awake in church!
My favorite paragraph – the description of what must be a daily torture to poor E – THE LOCKEROOM. PE was such a pointless indignity.
We know from canon and FF of many improper thoughts directed towards E in school by female staff, but it was a nice change to experience E’s reactions for once. Like any teenage boy he is enthralled by Ms. Gallant’s accent, ponytail and cleavage. His reaction to her furtive fantasy (about the Principal) … perfect!
"Edward. Don't make me hit you in the car." This make me laugh out loud. Child rearing in the Sixties for sure!
I think Edward better be careful flashing his teeth at people. This could lead to more questions.
| ficwriterjet chapter 1 . 4/30/2012
Great story. I thought it was so funny when ASS tried to punch Edward, and ended up breaking his own hand. LOL That was my favorite part of the whole thing. Well and Edward refering to the other kid as ASS all the time was pretty great too. I was amused by the teacher breaking his arm while trying to paddle Edward. :) At least Edward tried to stall. :)
| accounting professional chapter 1 . 4/30/2012
Good story. I loved the interaction. I thought it was funny when Edward ended up breaking bones when he was trying to steal the basketball.