|Reviews for Lineage|
| God of Laundry Baskets chapter 3 . 3/24
And this might be the reason why Qui-Gon totally misses Yoda's devious ploy earlier. He hasn't yet had Obi-Wan as an apprentice making him examine his words and the words of others. I just love these guys and Qui-Gon's frustration at Obi-Wan being so focused on leaving the Order that he's missing his offers of apprenticeship. There's just so much I love about this series. It's definitely influenced how I imagine Obi-Wan growing up under Qui-Gon and just-
I really like this series :3
| God of Laundry Baskets chapter 2 . 3/24
Rereading this after the last chapter of Legacy and just- you write these sneaky little jerks so well.
To be fair, I feel like Yoda's ploy is relatively straight forward but Qui-Gon is just so focused on the present that he misses it. :D Revisiting this after reading some of the Legacy books is just such a pleasure. :3
| Newtonsapple chapter 7 . 2/24
"You made a deliberately ambiguous promise with intent to deceive me."
And that's when you realized he was a jedi prodigy.
| Newtonsapple chapter 2 . 2/23
"What he did not see, in his headlong rush for the district spaceport, was the slow, sly smile which spread across the ancient master's face, or the satisfied, knowing light that filled his limpid green-gold eyes."
Yoda, you manipulative little troll.
| Newtonsapple chapter 1 . 2/22
"Then wouldn't you feel sympathy for an individual more than desire for the right?"
Ahh, the trouble with anti-villains...
This is really wonderful! I love Dooku being suave and Yoda being manipulative (because OF COURSE the best way to get Qui-gon to do something is to tell him he shouldn't!). And Obi being a witty little prodigy!
| Owly chapter 8 . 12/18/2014
I read this story (in fact, the entire Lineage series) for the first time before I'd ever even skimmed the actual JA series. Now I'm coming back to all of it after reading the original, and I have to say, your works have already buried themselves in my head - they are canon to me, now. Honestly, I love your vision of these characters and their relationships more than the way they're portrayed in the books, and the fact that your writing style is a bit more elevated, though that's to be expected knowing the audience JA was originally intended for. Now every time I read other Star Wars, especially JA, fanfiction, I find myself thinking "that's not the way the characters are supposed to be," even though I'm only basing my perception off of what you've written! tl;dr you've created a wonderful world and vibrant character portrayals that feel real, immediate, and up to par with every canon work. Thank you for all of this, because it brings such a depth to the characters and to the entire Jedi Order and Star Wars universe. This is a huge feat, and it's beautiful.
| Guest Floater chapter 8 . 6/19/2014
Laughing in amusement right from the beginning! Loved how Qui Gon pretty much hovered discreetly at the healers and then practically claimed Obi Wan as his padawan the moment he was to be released. Guess he learned his lesson the first time with Mixo Asaro and wasn't about to let the chance to work with Obi slip through his fingers again.
Know that DuCrion is still around probably doesn't bode well for the future. He's like the serpent in wait, perhaps not so skilled with the blade but more venomous for his cunning mind and his prior connections to Qui Gon and the Jedi. At least he's out of the picture for the immediate count. The potential for him and Dooku stirring the pot together in the days to come though...humm. Well, assuming DuCrion lives that long and the arrogant count stoops to working in collusion with him.
Ha ha ha! Qui Gon's dumbstruck moment when the council unanimously approves the apprenticeship. Priceless! Also love that moment when Qui Gon gave his new apprentice a hug there at the end. So cute!
| Guest Floater chapter 7 . 6/19/2014
Ahh...Qui Gon finally arrives to claim his wayward padawan. It's practically final in all but name anyways by this point. It's interesting to see that Qui doesn't cuddle the youngling, or waste any time in teaching that first crucial lesson in trust. Loved how you made Qui appear stern in his discussion with Obi Wan regarding where he went wrong in his decisions, but showed his soft side too in that moment when he took off his own cloak and swathed Obi in it.
Obi's growing vocabulary and Qui Gon's sneaking suspicion that the boy picked up the Huttese phrase from him was amusing to witness. Same with the resurgence of Obi's appetite now that the dust has settled. A few minutes in Qui Gon's company and Obi had already traded his academic assignments for political satire? Qui is indeed incorrigible isn't he? They're just the match for each other!
| Guest Floater chapter 6 . 6/19/2014
Okay...I need a moment here to gather my thoughts.
(deep breath). That was one powerful chapter. You have made DuCrion truly a twisted and sinister individual, one whose presence is both chilling and alarmingly disturbing. Far from the stereotypical cookie-cutter villain, your have successfully portrayed DuCrion as a calculating and manipulative adversary who stands to be a very real and credible threat. It's been said that some actors owned the stage when they made their appearance. In this particular instance I would say that DuCrion pretty much owned the encounters. He held all the advantage and cruelly manipulated the conditions of each meeting, purposely directing each situation to maximize poor Obi's distress while taunting Qui Gon's apparent helplessness.
Perhaps it's due to his prior Jedi training, but DuCrion seems intimately aware of just what will be the most damaging to the youngling. It seems like he wasn't going to settle for the easy goal of killing Obi Wan outright so much as he was aiming to make the kid Fall. I like Guerra, but he seemed like a bag of mixed blessings. His constant companionship and moments of pragmatic, upbeat attitude is a fine counterbalance to Obi Wan's distress and anger. However, his is at the same time projecting fear and pain in the vicinity of someone who has yet to master the art of shielding. It's no surprise that Obi is so confused and couldn't quite hold onto his serenity.
The one speck of light in all this is again Obi. I think it's great how well you delved into his thoughts and feelings. Despite having the power to strike out in anger, he tempered his own aggression and swallowed his pride to plead for his cellmate's life. In exchanging his own life for the Arconian's safety, and again offering his life in place of Guerra's, he has more than proved himself worthy of being a Jedi.
Xanatos though...wow... o.O
| Guest Floater chapter 5 . 6/19/2014
Wow! That have a rudimentary bond already! We knew this team was meant to be! (general cheers and claps all around...) They'll probably have quite a steep learning curve ahead as they discover each other's quarks and habits, but they will be an awesome team once they get over the initial bump and formally acknowledge each other as master and student. Come on Obi! Listen to the Force and accept the apprenticeship already!
On another note, I'll freely admit that while I've only completed a few books out of the Jedi Apprentice series, that bit of complaint regarding the downed ship's communications in the event of a pirate attack was hilarious. So was Xan's comment the previous chapter when he suspected Obi Wan of being a temple reject due anger and discipline issues.
Funny how minuscule variations in an alternative universe, perhaps just a small difference in environment or casual decision can have such a profound impact on the future. Maybe a Togorian pirate decided to turn left instead of right two star systems over, thus avoiding a ship wide grand melee but paving the way for the more dangerous confrontation between former padawan Xan and padawan elect Obi. Plus...Dooku and Qui Gon together? Honestly the possibilities boggle the mind. I'm really looking forward to seeing where you go with all this.
| Guest Floater chapter 4 . 6/16/2014
Xanatos is really over thinking this isn't he? He must be ludicrous to think that his former master would send a child into such danger in his place. Then, again, I suppose that was why their partnership really never worked out. He never understood Qui Gon. Xanatos himself would likely not hesitate to send people, including children, into danger if it will further his own goals. I'm frankly not surprised that in not understanding his former mentor, Xanatos would project his own failings onto his former master and believe him capable of such a deplorable act.
Then again, I can't help but think that Obi Wan should feel proud in inadvertently fooling such a cunning adversary if Obi weren't such a humble soul to begin with. Xanatos could clearly sense his innate talent and strength in the force. The more vemehently Obi Wan denies it, the more certain Xanatos becomes that Obi is somehow a skilled abet young operative sent specifically to accomplish some clandestine mission for the council. Sheer irony indeed!
Accusing Obi of being a Shadow though? That sounds a little sinister and likely the polar opposite of what Obi is destined to be. Poor Xanatos is clearly missing the boat here...
| Guest Floater chapter 3 . 6/16/2014
Woah! Xanatos hit the scene in chapter 3? That guy doesn't waste any time does he? Of all the places he could have been he just happens to be in the general vicinity of this particular hyperspace lane? The will of the Force at work? Or the evil and nebulous machinations of the powers that be behind the scenes? You may not have a loose plaid shirt and foldout chair (or maybe you do) but you write a hell of a cliffhanger there.
Anyways, It's really fun in some ways fun to see Obi Wan feeling his way out in the world. He kinda reminds of me of a fledgling bird recently vacating the nest, still so polite to the people around him and trying to be cautious but at the same time innocent to all the seedy characters outside his sheltered environment. Guess he'll learn fairly quickly now that Qui Gon has him unofficially under his wing. I also find it particularly notable that Obi Wan left the temple and brought his academic assignments with him! Gotta give credit where it's due, he is one dedicated student!
It's also sweet to see that Obi Wan still cares so much about the lives around him. Even though the Whiphids attacked first and would have likely severely injured or killed him, he still regretted the use of violence and the subsequent lost of life however intentionally it may be on his part. Poor Obi is being so hard on himself. Qui Gon is literally right there in front of him if only he would stop blaming himself and accept the help and guidance that is offered.
I'm not too worried though, the force and the nebulous powers that be will bring them together somehow. Hehe...
| Guest Floater chapter 2 . 4/20/2014
Qui Gon was gone for a two year assignment? That's quite a time lapse! I'm glad he made it back but honestly, I feel he's cutting it a bit too close for comfort. Obi Wan would be twelve by now and within a year of being discharged from the temple, although it would make more sense if he was already apprenticed to someone.
While your Obi Wan is intelligent, he is also cautious and thoughtful, probably less likely to be an eager young hothead constantly rising to Bruck's baits and taunts than a lot of other younglings. It's no surprise that someone else had noticed his potential and asked for his assent to join a master-padawan relationship. Qui Gon is lucky someone else has not apprenticed Obi Wan, though frankly the credit goes to Obi Wan for having the foresight to see their future together and waiting for his return.
I appreciated how you had Tahl waiting for Qui Gon as he disembarked and the frank conversations he had with Mace. Though they may not be related by blood it is nice to see that the Jedi have the equivalent of friends and (dare I say family?) at the temple. The first conversation he had with Obi Wan and it's portrayal as a sparring contest was skillfully done. The final section where Qui Gon practically begged the council for permission to find Obi Wan and ask for him as his padawan learner had me cheering. All in all a great chapter that sets up the start of their journey together nicely. Yoda's last word regarding breaking traffic laws had me guffawing out loud.
| Guest Floater chapter 1 . 4/20/2014
It looks like I'm a bit of a late comer to your series but I have to say that I am very glad to have discovered your writing. You frankly have one of the best vocabulary I have ever encountered on this site and your creativity and sense of humor flows easily into your stories. I love how you started this series with the senior council member using a bit of a reverse psychology on Qui Gon. Go figured that anything the council forbid him to do he will go ahead and immediately challenge. Ha ha!
It's also great that you started the series with Qui Gon meeting his future apprentice as a youngling. Despite his adamant protests regarding not taking another padawan, you've made it quite clear that they do connect on some level even at the very beginning and that Qui Gon is intrigued and interested, else he would not have made inquiries with Master Palo. It's downright amusing to see that everyone could recognize that Qui Gon was on the search before he himself realized it.
Bruck's cameo with the muja fruit made me laugh out loud and I think it's awesome how you ended the first chapter describing Obi Wan's dreams and foresight. It's like a demonstration of his unusually strong connection to the unifying force and a portent of things to come. Qui Gon's going to have to hold on his cloak because I suspect he's going to be in for a heck of a ride.
| x.faith.x23 chapter 2 . 3/16/2014
Another flawless chapter! I love how you convey Qui-Gon and Tahis relationship along with Qui-Gon and Obi-Wans! I really can't wait to read the next chapter to see how everything unfolds! You are an amazing writer.