|Reviews for Dance Until You Die|
| nonna99 chapter 6 . 11/11/2012
This is the first time I read your story, it's because I'm a great fan of CSI -Miami,
(especially of Calleigh and Eric) and I must say I love your story very much, it's great and I can't wait for more.
| zoeshade chapter 6 . 10/17/2012
Well that was a well thought plan
I wonder did Danny learn duplication yet or not?
Update at your speed
I won't rush you
I have 712 other stories to read anyway
Love this chapter
What does the ost look like?
| jeanette9a chapter 6 . 10/17/2012
I got a serious dejavu, but I still like the chapter. XD
| CSIalchemist chapter 6 . 10/17/2012
YAY! You finally updated! Keep going! I refuse to let this story go on hiatus so KEEP GOING!
That explains why the gang was in Miami in the first place.
For a moment there, I thought Danny was going to overshadow Horatio! I was relieved when they just gave him the slip instead...sort of. Now H has to look all over Miami to find them. What's worse Danny and Sam lied to a cop which is of course a big no-no! Not that I don't blame them, I mean would anyone believe their story?
| rana2001 chapter 5 . 10/13/2012
No, I was thinking NEXT CHAPTER NOW! NEXT CHAPTER NOW! NEXT CHAPTER NOW!
| fanficfantasies chapter 5 . 8/9/2012
Ha! This is really funny! I especially liked the part where Horatio says 'That's a very in-depth conversation you were having with yourself.' I thought he was going to dub Sam crasy! Write more!
| peppymint chapter 5 . 5/30/2012
Love this. So many DP crossovers tend to disappoint. Glad to see this will not be one of them.
| jeanette9a chapter 5 . 5/30/2012
OKAY IF YOU CAN READ MINDS!
try to read mine!
it has somthing to do about; how did he get here?
| jeanette9a chapter 4 . 5/30/2012
As we say over here; tooth’s in the wall and boots in the roof. Yup that’s a real party.
And you know that thing about it came from a ghost. I think an; I told you so, would be funny if they figure it out.
| CSIalchemist chapter 5 . 5/30/2012
LOL! I LOVED this chapter! The moment Danny revealed himself to Horatio was hilarious! I'm loving this story! You've nailed Horatio's character perfectly!
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!
| CSIalchemist chapter 4 . 5/30/2012
FINALLY YOU UPDATED! This is pretty funny so far! I love it!
I like the scene with Horatio. He's so sweet with kids! And not in creepy kind of way!
| Twillightfairy chapter 3 . 5/28/2012
Is the villain Technus, or another as of yet unknown ghost? Will Sam be willing to help Horatio and his team? This looks good and I for one would like to see what comes next. I figure the Jane Doe is Sam because of the eye color and the fact that she knows not only Danny but apparently what the killer is.
| HaiJu chapter 3 . 5/7/2012
Hello, here I am! :)
This seems to be a pretty straightforward "confuse-the-heck-out-of-crimebusters with ghost phenomena and then slowly reveal through a combination of sleuthing and crossover characters the true nature of the crime" kind of plot, which is great. Once the CSI gang accept the concept of ghosts it will be pretty open and shut.
What's different, and therefore interesting, is that it's Sam in a nightclub in Miami, armed with ghost technology and alone. What the heck? How on earth did she get there? Where are the rest of the gang? What's a ghost doing causing havoc in Miami? That's such a mystery, and I can't wait to find out what led her there.
Technically speaking, there were a couple of typos, but nothing major. Honestly I was more bugged by what wasn't there. It was...I dunno, sparse. The narrative could use beefing up, especially in the slower scenes. They don't need to be longer necessarily, but richer, more descriptive. Set the scene for us. Vary the sentence structure and paragraph length to give it pacing.
I don't recognize CSI characters by name and you never stop to describe them, so I had to depend completely on the dialogue to figure out what was going on sometimes. This could be fixed (and make your story so much easier to relate to) by just a little more time spent on describing people and surroundings.
Anyway, enough of my nit-picking. I like the concept, you seem to have the good beginnings of a plot, and it's very easy to follow. Your dialogue was clear and seemed to suit each character. I was very drawn into the prologue, and I liked that they didn't find her until after they were studying the dead bodies. Way to make her stand out, and very dramatic. The death by dancing thing is great-sadistic and very mysterious, but also cool and a little edgy. Just the thing to mix the weirdness of typical ghost attacks with a legitimate murder mystery.
| CSIalchemist chapter 3 . 5/7/2012
OMG! It's like I'm watching an actual episode of CSI Miami! I'm loving this! Keep going! I'm loving this!
| CSIalchemist chapter 2 . 5/7/2012
Awww... you mentioned me in the author's note! I'm flattered!
Brilliant! The way you ended this chapter reminds me of the actual show! Keep this up!