|Reviews for After Sacrifice|
| Sad face joe chapter 12 . 11/27/2014
What the hell brah wheres the rest
| UnScdude chapter 12 . 10/2/2012
Started reading this story and it's great. Keep going with it.
| Guest chapter 11 . 7/5/2012
Great story, but expand a little on what you have! You could double your words, add emotion, and clarify the scenes. Regardless, its awesome
| C4L3N chapter 13 . 6/29/2012
Seeing as how this fic was not deleted due to mature content as ive been warned by MULTIPLE authors Im assuming is not stepping up its content rules. Kinda grateful since most other sites suck or have a waiting list for membership .
| Guest chapter 13 . 6/28/2012
there is no address for where you moved your fiction, it was ovbiously deleted
| C4L3N chapter 10 . 5/26/2012
I figure in the world of Mass Effect nothing ever seems to according to plan so I try to fit those situations into the story. Tali wants to settle down but certain things happen and they get dragged into a conflict. Also in this case the went to help the colony and found it was already lost. I don't know how much further I'm going to take this particular story, I've already started work on a fic to be a sort of continuance but following a new character. The first chapter is not going to be done for some time since I'm putting a new more descriptive style of writing into it. Basically I'm aiming for highly detailed 5k word chapters. I'm not working alone either, my better half is going to be helping me to make sure it's all consistent and flows properly.
| C4L3N chapter 7 . 5/15/2012
Changes are coming, Im fully rewriting this chapter and taking the advice to even out the playing field between the lovers in terms of giving. Also Im going to try to add bits of generic human relationships into it as per request. I may not release it for up to 4-5 days since im going to be rather busy. Thanks for the catch on spelling Shepards name I honestly thought I was spelling it right XD.
| Sal002 chapter 7 . 5/15/2012
I like some of your ideas about Tali's and Shepard's relationship and not making their child some sort of weird hybrid creature.
However, it does feel like Shepard is doing all the giving. Maybe bring some aspects of generic human culture into their lives. It would be a perfect match to Tali's character for her to feel some guilt for Shepard giving up his immune system and culture. And slow it down a bit. Try to show that a formal bonding has been on Shepard's mind for some time before he goes to ask Raan. Maybe show Tali having worries about when/if Shepard would ever propose.
Also, you really need to proofread your chapters. His name is Shepard, damn it! One 'H'!
| MyinnerDEMON17 chapter 7 . 5/13/2012
Next they should see their son to start his own adventure
but so far i really like this story and i simply love anything with Tali because she sooooo cute
| Chris Redfield-General Chaos chapter 6 . 5/13/2012
I'm sorry, but you well and truly crossed the line with this fic. A good amount of a relationship is about compromise, finding the middle ground, yet all Tali has done to honor the human side of the relationship was wear some human clothes, while Shepard gave up his humanity? The defining characteristic of their relationship was the differences between them and how despite those differences, they were perfect together. This ruins what made their union special. I felt this story was a little lacking (in the words of James Vega: Where's the meat) but this completely killed it.
| silentmarine chapter 6 . 5/13/2012
This is a good aftermath story and nice use of the indoctrination theory. I can imagine that some would find the idea of "gene-modding" to be controversial. The story is coming along great though for Tali fans.
I think some of the newer readers may be confused by the name confusion. When I saw "Raal", I thought of "Rael'Zorah", but I knew that he died in ME2. If you can, you should re-check your chapters.
You should use the Wiki for information on the Quarians if you need more background, espcially the language section. ( wiki/Quarian)
| C4L3N chapter 6 . 5/13/2012
Thanks for the feedback guys. The last few chapters I write for this story are going to be based mostly on your input and where the story goes. Honestly IDK when I'll end it since I've never been able to find a good conclussion for the Mass Effect trilogy. My philosophy is when you (or BioWare) create a Universe a single trilogy doesn't cut it when there are hundreds of other stories that can be told. I will miss Tali but I know if they do nother game based in the Mass Effect universe, Quarian all the way.
Lol sorry had to get that out there, anyway I should have this next chapter out either this morning or this afternoon if I remember to publish it after work. Hell I might hold onto it till tomorrow and make it a goal to get a good 5k words into it. You never know, anyway back to typing.
PS: If anyone wants to have some fun, I could use a basic Kellish-english dictionary.
Since they never released a full dictionary, I was thinking if we the fans had one, We could get away with writing much of our own lore regarding the Quarians.
| NucaCola chapter 6 . 5/13/2012
The idea isn't really that contravertial, the most people who read Tali/Shep stories like the idea to begin with however impossible it is. So don't worry.
This IS an intresting take on this concept though. Cool idea.
| potnoodle11 chapter 6 . 5/13/2012
I gess that was hard to wight but you did it, it worked well and no need to change anything in this chapter, you were able to keep the ME law so I gess it worked good job, if you ever come in to something like this again and you don't know if it would go against ME law or something like that then just PM me and I will help you out
| Thisaccountisoffline chapter 5 . 5/12/2012
This story is great I like it alot me personaly wish this would have been the end to ME3 Shepard with Tali on Rannock together keep up the good work