Reviews for A Red and Yellow Affair
Panther chapter 11 . 9/13/2012
!YOU ALMOST BROKE THE 4TH WALL!?Oh well, I read a story where Spike broke the entire 4th wall at the end of the story.
Nabi Cresci chapter 1 . 9/13/2012
This reminds me of Nocturne by Scychodrome. Can't wait to read the rest.
Panther chapter 6 . 9/13/2012
I love how you change the Point-of-view between the characters.
Guest chapter 6 . 9/9/2012
Not as cute as the others, but still pretty cute. Fluttermac 4 eva!
Guest chapter 5 . 9/9/2012
I. FREAKING. DIED. OF. CUTENESS. READING. THIS. CHAPTER.
Guest chapter 4 . 9/9/2012
HOLY. CRAP. THIS. IS. TO. DARN. CUTE! :D
Guest chapter 3 . 9/9/2012
THE. BEST. CHAPTER. YET!
P.S. I like speaking in short sentences. And yelling
Guest chapter 2 . 9/9/2012
Even. Freaking. Cuter. Than. The. Last. Chapter.
Guest chapter 1 . 9/9/2012
So. Freaking. Cute.
anonymous-lemonade chapter 28 . 8/20/2012
Since chapter 1, I wanted to write a review for this story but I kept pressing the 'Next' button too fast and ended up swept away by the story. So, now that I am at the end, I thought I would love to write a worthy review for this wonderful story.

First off, I would like to compliment you on your amazing characterizations. It's so easy to get swept up by our own interpretations of the characters from the show that we loose sight of their essence but that was never the case for you. I love your portrayal of Big Mac, especially since he's not a prime character in the series. It's always fun to read a story that expands on a character's life, especially if the author portrays them IC. I also love Fluttershy and the way you wrote her was nearly perfect (personally, I would have loved to see her a bit more assertive since you mentioned the episode where she took the seminar. This would imply that she would have grown as a character and be more strong. It's hard to juggle such a shy pony and make her both self-reliant and keep her in-character, but I've seen you juggle similar dynamics with the other characters too, so I have faith that it can be done :). I know it's hard to portray such a meek character and make her dynamic and interesting at the same time. One of the things I've always loved about Fluttershy is the potential for growth. Some of my favorite episodes of MLPs are the ones where Fluttershy isn't all perfect and whatnot but flawed. It's way more interesting to see someone's personal journey and struggles than to just see them in the same type of settings over and over again. That's why I actually really like the drama and dark subjects in this story. It grounds the story and makes it feel "more".

As for things that I might suggest you take into consideration for future stories, I believe that if you give each chapter another "once over", you'll probably be able catch a lot of your mistakes and typos. And the typos are one of the most glaring issues I had with this story. It wasn't to the point where I couldn't understand what you were saying but it was distracting.

Other than mechanics though, it seems like you have nice firm grasp of the characters and the tone of the show and this shows in the quality of your writing. Might I suggest you get someone to read your stories once before you post? Just so that you have a fresh pair of eyes to look over some of the more minute problems that can easily be fixed. :D

Thank you so much for feeding my love for FlutterMac and I truly look forward to reading more stories from you! :3 Wonderful job!
Littleheart123 chapter 1 . 8/19/2012
I simply love it! Delightful! I'm a Fluttermac girl anyway...
partyyou chapter 28 . 8/19/2012
Is it over?
Guest chapter 8 . 8/18/2012
ANYTHING but Colgate, bonbon and Berry punch!
Angelina L chapter 28 . 8/18/2012
Beautifully written with a couple of letter mistakes but that doesn't really matter overall the entire story was well thought out and original. I can't wait to see more and your writing is blossoming
Biggmomma46 chapter 28 . 8/18/2012
Totally awesome chapter. I'm glad the foal wasn't soaring foal. Looking forward to new story. Cudos
315 | « Prev Page 1 .. 2 3 4 5 6 7 14 .. Last Next »