|Reviews for Looking Down From Cerulean Skies|
| Narwhale chapter 12 . 7/28/2013
I must say, this was a great, if a bit verbose, chapter. I like how Terra is hesitant on joining Banon and the Returners at first- how she felt uneasy, but soon decides to make her mind up. Great description and capture of emotion, and great development.
I don't recall an Arcell from the previous chapter, but I liked his interaction with Terra. Original Characters are just wonderful, aren't they?
And it was nice how Sabin explains his blitz moves, too.
And when the Returner questioned Terra, I was afraid a fight was going to break out- if only that happened in the game. And a solid ending to this chapter as the adventure finally begins (about time too XD)
There's just so much more I want to say. I could praise your story all day, but I'll save you the hassle and say that you did a fine job. It's only a shame your updates aren't frequent, but as I said before, I'll wait patiently for when you finally find the time to write the next chapter, and ultimately, finish this great work!
| Anatherin chapter 11 . 7/22/2013
Ah! Sorry it took me so long to review. But better late than never, especially if it's a wonderful chapter like this! _ It's like they keep getting better and better.
I like how you have Locke hanging out with his Returner buddies. I don't think I've seen that in a fanfic before, surprisingly. I think some people, including me, forget that he's known those people longer than the main characters at that point.
Again, I love Edgar and Sabin. Just sayin'. Brotherly moments and such. I also loved the part where Sabin is laughing at him for being all regal and mannerly while he's drinking.
Anyway, I look forward to new chapters ahead! _ Loving it so far.
| Narwhale chapter 11 . 6/4/2013
I've been meaning to read your story, but haven't had the time until now. Its nice to see yet another great chapter from a great author.
Again, love the detailed settings and descriptions of each character, what they're doing, and all that small stuff. Great character interactions, again, and love the development of the plot. If there is one thing that I can point out, its that the chapter could have been written in longer lengths to get the flow of the story moving faster. Of course, I couldn't have written this better myself, so don't listen to me!
Love it! Love it! LOVE IT! Can't wait until the real journey starts!
| Anatherin chapter 10 . 5/21/2013
:D I like it! And I also love the twins' reunion last chapter, but I forgot to review that one.. :P
Oh, and I noticed the reference to your Edgar and Sabin's childhood story. _ I thought that was pretty great. The scene with Terra and the trapping was great too...haha
And Shadow is stealthy... B
Can't wait for the next chapter! Yay for Returner's hideout! :D
| Narwhale chapter 10 . 5/17/2013
Well, I'm amazed that you posted another chapter sooner than expected. Not that that's a bad thing. It was really fun reading this chapter. Loved the character interactions, but I'm looking forward to when Locke will meet with Celes (don't get me wrong, I'm by no means a crazy shipper!). Also, I can't wait when things really start to pick up and the real adventure begins. Cyan rocks!
Keep up the good work! I look forward to future chapters!
| SGRTJ756 chapter 6 . 4/7/2013
Hi! Read this chapter as well *-* I think it's my fav so far. I liked how you had Edgar discussing politics with his military staff, these are the kind of things I enjoy the most in novelizations, things that don't happen in game but help to flesh out the world and people living in it ;)
(The only thing I found distracting in that scene was the physical description of the maids, I don't think we need to know how they look like, though I was surprised that you described one of them as 'plump', I guess I have to applaud your inclusiveness :P)
The scene with Edgar and Matron was very sweet. Other thing I liked is that you started Kefka's attack from the sentries' PoV instead of showing Edgar waking up as in the game. Also, this is my favourite scene of the whole game so I can never tire of reading the different interpretations and perpectives other people can come up with. This one was very enjoyable and dynamic as well. Only that...
Bring us the girl!
No, it's bring ME the girl :P Yes, I know it's stupid and doesn't even deserve to be mentioned, but to me it adds infinite sexy points to Kefka when he speaks only for himself, particularly in regards to sweet little Terra xD
Anyway, this was an interesting take on the whole Kefka vs Figaro and the battle that ensues. My favourite part was when Terra burns down the M-tek armour and watches as fire consumes it. That was badass! You made the dialogue between the trio sound much more natural and not as offensive as in game (offensive because it sounded as if they were verbally attacking Terra, and offensive because m-m-m-m-magic, that made them look both stupid, and Locke the most considering Terra's been using magic since their first met -.-)
"pointing in the direction of a colorful hopping figure that was letting loose a string of obscenities that could barely be heard over the desert wind" - And we don't want to hear them :P
| SGRTJ756 chapter 5 . 4/7/2013
Hi! This chapter was really a lot of fun, thanks mainly to Edgar's royal presence and his rusty arts of seduction :P
I like to see Edgar and Locke acting as friends, leaving formalities aside and hugging each other, it's really endearing. Also, it's cool that you decided to add a personal touch to their interactions, dialogues in particular as it gets boring if everything goes exactly as the game (I, for one, am not reading novelizations to see Kefka uttering his infamous Woolsey-esque line of son of a submariner, if I wanted that I would just go and replay the game -.-)
Also, it's great that we share the same headcanon about Terra's 'immunity' to extreme weather, particularly hot weather since she has an afinity with fire, I really liked to read this little detail included in your version *-*
Is it me or Terra is pretending to be at ease when she's actually very anxious about what's going on? Her cheerfulness seems a bit misplaced and I get the impression that she's just pretending, or at least, doing her best to keep quiet not to panic. She does trust Locke, thief or not, but I'm still unsure whether she's trusting Edgar the same or just 'acting' for everyone's sake. She did feel uncomfortable around the maids (they could've offered her a bath, for crying out loud! xD I mean, she's been wandering around the effin desert and they expect she'd look all clean and crisp?) Terra feeling suddenly self-conscious about her appearance was fitting; I enjoy realistic details like dirty clothes, sweat, twigs in the hair, it makes it all easier to relate to since those things do happen in real life and add another layer of humanity to these characters.
"Kefka had surely come for her, and she must have been very important to the Emperor if he sent his highest ranking man." Damn right! I hate (hate hate) when people forget this.
Regarding Kefka, it was a nice (and again realistic) detail that he changes his make-up style, but I think what I liked the most was that you used the verb 'swaggered' to describe his walking :P
"You should take a look at your attire, my friend." Lol, you and your purple lipstick, Locke! xD
Btw, Edgar's parents don't have canon names, however, Soraya Saga calls them Steward and Christiel in her doujinshi The marriage of Figaro, and since she created the Figaros I thought you may want to know ;)
Yay for Terra pondering over free will. Also, Terra hiccupping is like the most adorable mental picture ever *-*
| SGRTJ756 chapter 4 . 3/17/2013
I approve of magic being used outside battles, and Locke's answer is pretty logical, I mean, what can be more useful than a Fire spell? You can cook, light the night, keep warm, I liked his reasoning.
"What's so bad about being weird huh? I mean, look at me! I'm a weirdo! Though I wouldn't recommend acting too much like me!" Terra gave him an odd look. "Terra, you are a little strange, but that's normal in itself. Everyone has their quirks. Everyone has their worries, troubles and oddities. But don't feel like you're a Leafer in a Chocobo Stable. You'll fit in fine!"
That was a great speech. He didn't try to make her feel comfortable trying to convince her that she's just like the rest when she actually isn't, no one is like no one else, people are all different from each other, and meh, normal is overrated.
I like how you described Terra's feelings when she cuddled up under Locke's jacket, and figuring what a man would smell like (I'm sure you used to know that already,Terra!)
Terra and the fish, hmm, I wonder why she didn't feel disgusted and liked it burnt to a crisp.
LOL. I just hope the bug wasn't a roach, please, anything but roaches! Terra laughing and giggling made my heart melt. And did I mention how I love the way you're handling Locke's characterization?
The chapter was very entertaining. My only objection is that I think it would take them longer to travel between Narshe and Figaro desert, but overall I really liked it.
Edgar sure is a lot of fun (best goddamn character in the game) but I gotta go now :(
| SGRTJ756 chapter 3 . 3/17/2013
Yay, two chapter in a row, this must be my lucky day! This chapter was even better, now that Terra's back into action.
I'll try to make it short because I want to keep on reading.
The moogles showing up before Locke to check on Terra was way cooler than they suddenly popping up of nowhere in the most convenient moment to help in the battle.
I LOVED Terra's flashback! Kefka sounds really in character and the descriptions of the fire and Terra's carnage was intense! Empy Gesty... At first I was going to protest about this lack of formality, until I found myself laughing when I repeated it out loud. Now I'm still smiling, oh dear...
Locke, I love his characterization and speech pattern, and his brief interaction with Arvis (I hope we get more of this, I know they don't interact again in the game but damn if they're fun together).
The battle scene was pretty good! That poor mammoth :( I really liked your description of Mog's dance at the end, you made it feel so plausible!
Yay for Rachel's foreshadowing and I really enjoy little details like Locke leaving his heavy bag in that tree, they add some much needed realism into the story, considering it's based on a game and all :)
I'm looking forward to seeing Edgar's intro.
| SGRTJ756 chapter 2 . 3/17/2013
Yay I finally could sit down and read the whole chapter, I started again from the beginning but it's so cool when my sweet little Terra is on the spotlight, I always feel like we don't get enough of her in the game.
It was a very intelligent detail how Arvis realised that the invadors hadn't left town. I always wonder what happened right after Terra reacted to Valigarmanda and passed out, just how and why did Arvis get there? I liked your solution very much :)
About Arvis, at first I got the impression that he was too relaxed all the time when he should've been more concerned about the whole situation, but then re-reading the first part I thought, well, he's an old man (I also believe he's in his late fifties) and emotions tend to settle down when we grow older, so I can dig it. My only doubt is if he knew Terra was an Imperial Soldier when he rescued her, or found out later, when he noticed her circlet and realised it was a slave crown.
Arvis is a sweetie, in any case. And it's great that Locke is already coming closer, to me it always made little sense how he found Terra before the guards, what took them so long? They were just there, could have jumped, they're trained soldiers after all :P
I liked the part when Narshe citizens are talking about the invasion, and that there were relatives of the dead guards.
"She dreamed of a shiny and clean palace where she was treated with civility, and of a man with a blond ponytail and a wicked grin."
Ohohoh, this got me hooked!
It's cool how you integrated some gameplay elements, as when Arvis gives her a shield and knife. But Terra, you forget the elixir in the clock!
I also liked how she gradually remembered the names of vegetables and spices as she ate, it's a nice touch regarding her amnesia. Cool detail also that she cures herself after the fall.
The pacing felt natural to me, not rushed, and I greatly enjoyed it. Still more Terra the next chapter, yay!
| SGRTJ756 chapter 1 . 2/22/2013
I finally got the time to seat down and read the whole chapter in detail, hurray!
First off, I really like the title of this chapter. Now prepare for my incredibly subjective review. You shouldn't really take it all as criticism, since it mostly consists of my very personal opinions -because, you know, I can't read something without forming an opinion, or a lot, anyway…
I'm sure you've heard this many times, but you have amazing skills for description, particularly descriptions of environment, they're justly detailed and one can get a precise idea of what the characters are seeing. I love descriptions that involve Narshe's distinct climate and geography because I adore everything that has to do with cold and snowy places are the most beautiful sight in the world. (Teeth clattering together from the chill, the wind carrying flurries of snow, the sheltered clothes...)
I also like the Imperials' humane distaste for what they perceive as unnecessary carnage, and these particular quotes are quite evocative of their current state of mind:
'Somehow, no matter how long one had been in the military, the sound of death was still unnerving in its honesty and finality.'
'Voices of the men who had died haunted Vicks and Wedge's minds, humming low and eventually started sounding like white noise coming from a malfunctioning radio.'
I also enjoyed your insight into the frozen esper and this line in particular (I love to quote):
'It was like a snapshot of the past, an old fossil drug up from the planet's crust, the emotion in its expression clear and crystalline.'
Now, I'm surprised that you chose 'Vicks' instead of the more familiar 'Biggs' and I'm curious to know the reason, probably a nostalgic feeling? P
About characterization, I have a complaint to make regarding Wedge. He's a bit too clumsy and 'relaxed' for an Imperial Soldier who's supposed to be on such a delicate mission; it feels as if he has no idea why they sent him there in the first place, and he shouldn't need to be explained what to do when they have almost reached their target. I'm also a little baffled about his interactions with Terra. He's supposed to know who she is, or at least be aware of what she *can do* and the in-game characters seemed too frightened of her to have any attempts at being friendly towards her. Sure, they could inwardly think (and I enjoyed Vicks' introspections about her being too young and pretty to endure that situation) but I highly doubt they would voice their moral objections aloud; they fear the Imperial Witch.
As a side note, I have Biggs and Wedge's roles inverted in my headcanon; Wedge always seemed to me the one in charge P
About Terra in particular, I would advice you against fancy adjectives and metaphors to describe hair and eye colour, though this is just my pet peeve and other people might like it, but I *personally* believe one remark is enough to let us know her hair is green and is considered unusual (I also admit I prefer her with blonde hair but that's too subjective to be relevant here P)
'Apparently, she had been that way for years now, acting like a puppet.' The game never tells us how much time passed between Terra's flashbacks and the Narshe mission but to me it seemed quite recently, certainly not years but months ago at most. Banon also speaks of her 'burning fifty soldiers' as a fresh event, but I digress.
'Her thin frame told of possible malnourishment, Kefka's fault most likely.' This one line annoyed me a little. If she was indeed malnourished it would most likely be Gestahl's fault than Kefka's, even Cid and the scientists' fault. Gestahl seemed to be the one in charge of her movements so I wouldn't lay all the blame at Kefka's door. Also, unless it's completely necessary to subject her to this kind of torture (and I would insistently wonder *why*) I doubt it's a wise move to nearly starve your secret weapon. If she was, indeed, deemed as little more than a secret weapon, they would make sure that she's well nourished; think about a machine that needs enough fuel and oil to function. Leaving that aside, her BMI is within normal *Western* parameters so I don't think she's *that* thin to arouse Vick's suspicions.
'As Vicks righted himself, he was astounded at how gracefully the magic user could maneuver her armor unit. She had the elegance of a bird in flight.' I just loved this line about Terra's elegance and grace )
'And for the first time in ages, she dreamed.' This one is beautiful too, a fitting ending for the first chapter. I wonder if you're planning to develop Tritoch's role in the story and his interactions with Terra. (I'll be looking forward to their next encounter.)
Anyway, as I warned you beforehand, these are mostly subjective remarks so you're free to ignore them as they don't really affect the quality of your work. It was a very enjoyable read )
| Anatherin chapter 8 . 2/7/2013
Moogle! You're back! :D I love the new chapter, and actually just read through the whole tory again...haha
You write the characters so well! And I must say, even though it's not in this chapter, I loved the scene with sleepy Edgar and Matron! Hahah so cute...
And Shadow was very cool. _ He's one of my favorites, as well as Edgar and Terra.
Happy to hear you'll be updating more! :)
All for now,
| alesana4ever chapter 8 . 2/7/2013
Good story so afr.
| Toxic Truffles chapter 8 . 2/6/2013
| Narwhale chapter 7 . 2/1/2013
Again, another great chapta! Though I wish we could have seen more...
Still, I love your descriptions of the cave and the town. It's absolutely amazing how well you describe your settings. Loved it!
It's only a shame you don't publish often, but great things do come to those who wait, right? Until then, I'll be patiently waiting for the next chapter of this great story! Take your time and keep up the good work!