|Reviews for Every Rose Has its Thorns|
| amyawesome chapter 1 . 6/21/2012
hmmm... I like it... 3
| potter phoenix 1 chapter 1 . 5/23/2012
pretty good story hope you continue this
| Natalie-E-G chapter 1 . 5/22/2012
1. I am a critic and about to say some harsh things. Please remember if I could do creative writing, I would have already written my own fanfiction stories. So I applaud you efforts that I cannot even make. However I am going to spill blood. This is not a flame. Do not take the comments personally. Do not stop trying to write if you enjoy it.
2. I pray you are not from an English (any version) country. If you are from an English speaking country I hope you are only in the 2rd or 3rd grade of education.
a. When you change speakers, you start a new paragraph.
b. When you change subjects, you start a new paragraph.
c. There are things called spell checkers. In your case not only use a spell checker but before selecting a word in the spell checker, check a dictionary to make sure that word is the one you desire. Some words I actually had to make guesses at like putride as putrid. I seem to remember one place, I could not figure out the word you meant. I would list it but the entire writing so offends my sense of the English language I do not want to look at it again.
d. Punctuation. It is something to make things flow better. When giving a multi-part sentence made up of clauses, separate with a comma (like I just did in this sentence).
e. When using contractions use an apostrophe. Wont is a word but it means a habit or customary behavior. What you meant to use was won't. Won't a contraction for the two words "will not".
f. Proof read then send to proof readers. There are many on . Just ask for one or two.
g. Put a blank line between paragraphs like you little talk between Miharu, Ranma, Akane, and Ryoga at the top and bottom. It make it more relaxing on the eyes.
h. The English language has verb tenses as all languages I am familiar with do. Mixing tenses is not correct. One of the worst offenses was "slip and drowned". You mixed present tense "slip" with past tense "drowned".
i. Sentences ALWAYS start with an upper case letter or a number.
j. While I personally disagree with the use of "I" for indicating oneself (I see it as vain and indicating a SELF centered view of he world, especially with "you", "he", "she", "they", ... are all lower case unless the first word in a sentence.) please use the upper case form instead of "i".
k. Please come up with a better introductory/slash attention getting line than "