|Reviews for The Life and Times of a Winning Pony|
| JimVan chapter 13 . 12/29/2012
Hoo boy! I think I hear a bomb meter ticking down. Who'd have thought that Ponyville's resident Charlie Horse would end up in a situation like this? To be fair though, she honestly hasn't been trying to sink in too deep with either Blossomforth or Eepysqueak - it was only that she lacks the strength to resist their advances. CK ain't the first to do that, even though she knows it was the wrong thing to do. If I were her, I'd be tearing out my hair - er, mane. Derpy, Blossomforth, and Fluttershy would be like choosing between chocolate tart, cheesecake, and lemon-meringue pie. And even worse, once you've gobbled one up, the other two start to look even more tempting than before, even though you can't eat them.
Ain't I a stinker? Anyway, great chapter as usual. The "hall of memories" scene with Derpy was gripping, and the later game of nursemaid with a weak and vulnerable Blossomforth was very heartwarming. But with how things are going, and with CK's bubble of tension about Blossomforth, I imagine she's not going to keep her V-card much longer if she stays in the house of the pony who may or may not realize how much she loves her yet. I love where this story seems to be headed. Keep up the good work!
| mlpfan chapter 13 . 12/11/2012
totally worth the wait. each new chapter just keeps adding to how amazing this story is and how much i am loving it.
| The Kobold Necromancer chapter 12 . 12/4/2012
I just wanted to say that I love, love, LOVE your story! And I love all your work! One day, I'll get a profile on FIMfiction, but here is where I started and all. I have read this since the beginning, and I love the side stories too! They're heartwarming, gripping, dramatic, and hilarious at times! Cloud Kicker needs to have a bigger fan base and public knowledge.
Because of you, I spot Cloud Kicker out in the background crowds of MLP. You have done such a good job with a character no one had put anything into. And trust me, as someone who did that very same thing, I love your efforts and your writing.
I cannot wait to see more... especially since Cloud Kicker is now officially in love with THREE ponies when she's sworn not to fall in love. Damn traumatic childhoods messing up everything today! Damn them, I say! :D
| JimVan chapter 12 . 11/21/2012
Dude, every step of the way, it looks more like Cloud Kicker has a Shepard's Choice to make.
To be fair, it looks like Blossomforth IS getting the worst of the three specials in CK's life, even when she's probably the one who's done the most for herin recent times. I can understand why she'd feel jilted at losing Cloud Kicker even though technically they were never together. Nothing hurts worse than realizing your chance for everything your ever wanted had come and gone from right under your nose (er, muzzle) without you ever even knowing it. I can only picture Blossomforth being bitter and regretful about that - there must be so many 'I should have''s running through her mind.
Cloud Kicker managed to do the right thing about Fluttershy in the earlier part of the chapter, but, just as I predicted, they blended back together like milk chocolate again without even trying it, and her attempt at not getting romantically attached to Eepysqueak again flew out the window just as quickly as it landed.
And then there's still Derpy. The sweetheart who deserves everything CK can give her and she's already knee-deep in it with.
At this rate, this story's gonna need multiple endings...and I imagine the difference will be a lot bigger than just a differently-colored wave of energy spreading accross Equestria...
| mlpfan chapter 12 . 11/16/2012
and another awesome chapter. I really like how you ended it off and now my mind is a buzz with what's going to happen next. you're stories are amazing inspiration for one's imagination.
| AC chapter 12 . 11/15/2012
I chuckled at the chapter title. I thought it was clever, but that's just me.
Anyway, another great chapter Chengar. Those last lines in every chapter are always hilarious. Sometimes, I honestly wonder if someone has said that this story, or you, are winning? I would be very surprised if someone hasn't.
| TMNTurtwig chapter 12 . 11/13/2012
So, at first I was like, "At least Fluttershy is thinking with her head." And then I was like, "Cloud Kicker, you are in so over your head."
Unfortunately for Cloud Kicker I don't think this will end with an orgy.
| mlpfan chapter 11 . 10/30/2012
Awesome chapter. It was great to see Fluttershy and Cloud Kicker make up. Can't wait to see what you have happen next.
| JimVan chapter 11 . 10/22/2012
Uh. Oh. I predict this going from triangle to pyramid.
I can sympathize with Cloud Kicker's sentiment wanting to - er - kick it all and head off to Las Pegasus. This is quite the sticky knot she's tied up in (I doubt even Blossomforth could manage that one).
So, on one hand - Derpy. Nice, comfortable relationship for both of them. Not exclusive, but one of the rare cases that may work out that way. CK would probably lose interest in others after a while anyway. Her daughters are happy enough with her, and she might indeed have an eventful future as part of Derpy's family.
On the other hand, Blossomforth. A young crusher. She isn't naive, but probably only loves the idea of being in love. Or at least CK thinks so. Blossomforth would mean the traditional, exclusive, all-stops-pulled and high-drama relationship. And while being with your best friend has the potential to be the best relationship ever, there usually tend to be issues later on. I can understand CK's worries. Blossom would have to make some major changes for her.
On the third hand (sic), Eepysqueak. She was Cloud Kicker's first - a very meaningful role in one's life - and with all their painful history sorted, and the possibility that their feelings for each other are very much real and still alive, Fluttershy and Cloud Kicker would blend together like milk chocolate. As naturally as if Flight Camp was last week. With her pain gone, Cloud Kicker would no doubt lose interest in sleeping with others altogether, and Fluttershy would be deliriously happy. It's obvious she would be tough competition for both Derpy and Blossomforth since she was the beginning, and quite possibly the end, of all of Cloud Kicker's promiscuity.
Still, there's a few things we haven't seen, like a flashback how Cloud Kicker and Blossomforth first met. That, I'd love to see (I get the feeling that all the earlier teasing would be quite hilarious).
| CSX5344 chapter 11 . 10/19/2012
Been looking forward to this update, glad to say it was most definently worth the wait. Excellent job!
| TMNTurtwig chapter 11 . 10/19/2012
Damn, Cloudkicker. You just never learn do you?
| JimVan chapter 10 . 10/15/2012
Been a long time coming, this review, and I've thought pretty long and hard about what to say.
So let's start with some good, old-fashion scaling: on 1 to 10, I'd give it a 10.
Storyline is gripping - not in the action-packed, edge-of-the-seat sense, but with clever use of foreshadowing and hints that makes the reader keep coming back for the interesting events behind it, especially in the deal with Flight Camp. You make clever use of background characters, making them interesting and preferable to being 'placeholder' characters. The story is also very well-written, with good vocabulary and an easy, laid-back tone that delivers your narrator's attitude perfectly.
As to your characterization and plot devices surrounding them, well, Cloud Kicker's attitude and her promiscuous adventures are sleazy, squeaky, risque, politically-incorrect and downright disgusting - I love it! Laughed like a drain at how she invariably ends up in bed with whomever crosses her path and exchanges more than a couple of sentences with her - even though she's built up a reputation and apparently claims to know where to draw the line. And still somehow, she ends up with two beautiful mares, both fully aware of her promiscuity, fighting over her. She's a little bit of a reverse-Mary Sue (as in 'so bad she's good' - congratulations on actually pulling that off).
You've given Blossomforth a good, believable 'best friend' persona- er, ponysona - er, well, you get what I mean (I ain't so much a brony yet as to automatically Equestria-fy my writing). She plays the part of the sweet and slightly shy best friend really well - although, I have to admit, it did seem quite a leap for her affection to seem completely platonic in the beginning, only for it later to be written that she had a crush all along. Nevertheless, this is perfect for the developing plot and Cloud Kicker's current 'love triangle' dilemma. Nice twist making her a horny drunk, that had to be just about the most hilarious part of the story, minus the knot she tied herself up in and got CK in an awkward situation with.
I imagine she's going to try a lot of increasingly corny and hilarious antics in the coming chapters to try to win Cloud Kicker's love. It wouldn't surprise me if she pretended to be a mare in distress before a befuddled stallion or faked getting chased out of the Everfree by zombie ponies ("Really? Even though you're a pegasus?")
You portrayed Derpy in a manner that would warm the hearts of bronies everywhere (and thanks for not acknowledging any of that soccer mom bullcrap about reverting her). From what you've shown it seems only a bubbly, good-natured space cadet like her could tame a wild animal like Cloud Kicker. Masterfully done with her sneaky 'hardass mom' tactics, especially that ice water trick. She's bound to be tough competition for Blossomforth even when she sits down and does nothing (which I imagine she might be doing and holding in her amusement at her valiant competition)!
Rainbow Dash is explored in a new way, both as a friend and boss to other characters, with a good handle on her responsibilities and a nose for opportunities, but with the general rashness and temperament of her canon role. It was obviously hard work to fit that into the role she plays in this fic, as she is often portrayed as more of a lone wolf - er, pony - in the show, but that's another point of interest for your work. The whole pre-show story with Flight Camp, and RD's role in it, struck me as a bit of a stretch for her character, but with some fleshing out and additional backstory in the next couple of chapters, perhaps you can make it fit properly to the 'canon' Rainbow Dash. But, in any case, she plays an interesting role in your fic.
The whole thing with Applejack and Rarity fits their characters perfectly and makes for a hilarious side-story to boot! I've never seen a funnier or better-written love/hate relationship in all of fanfiction (and I've seen plenty).
The relationship with Fluttershy and CK's rude wake-up call as a result makes for a moving and meaningful addition to the story. Who would've thought that sweet, naive Eepysqueak could've been anything but deliriously happy at having CK say she loved her? Love the 'Eepysqueak' gimmick by the way - good stroke of imagination there.
Of course, including the fillies, especially new characters of Dinky, Alula, and Sparkler, would have been interesting to readers who enjoy funny adorableness - very heart-warming. Funnily enough, you managed to put a story with kiddy fun and serious adult matters together in a rather flowing and interesting way.
But above all else, Cloud Kicker's amusing narrations and very sexually-oriented trains of thought make for an amusing (and admittedly thought-provoking) read, which is probably this fic's greatest strength. So my advice would be this: while I know it's hard to find the enthusiasm and time for a seriously-long fic, I know a lot of readers - especially me - would be happy if you kept this going a long time on a roller coaster ride, with new and ever-changing plot lines, with Cloud Kicker being Cloud Kicker the whole way through.
From what I can see though, it looks like you may be planning to close up the fic with Tornado Duty and aftermath, with Cloud Kicker making a choice. I'm not going to ask for either - I'm sure you can have the best judgment on the appropriate ending.
And let me close up with just a couple of suggestions you may or may not wish to consider: Derpy's much -loved clumsiness nearly fries Cloud Kicker in bed, Blossomforth makes outrageously corny and amateurish attempts to seduce Cloud Kicker, Fluttershy tries to enter the picture again to try to fix things up when she hears about the fuss, but every time she's scared off by walking in at the exact single moment that looks pretty darn compromising for Cloud Kicker, and Twilight Sparkle grows frustrated with the continued hell-raising in Ponyville and tries to settle things in her usual way.
Keep up the good work!
| AlucardHellgate chapter 5 . 10/7/2012
I so called it!
From when Luna was first mentioned I just knew she and Cloud kicker was going to do it.
| Burc'ya Ordo chapter 10 . 10/6/2012
...wow. That's a lot of thought to put into this. A very disparate view on Equestria from many other fics, but that is certainly not a bad thing.
Good mechanics, interesting methods. Looking forward to more.
| mlpfan chapter 10 . 9/28/2012
and another amazingly intense and entertaining chapter. I was on the edge of my seat during the entire arguement between Derpy and Blossom. Awesome work as always.