|Reviews for Immortal Souls|
| vendela.parker chapter 25 . 4/22
Hey! I've never actually reviewed any of your stories before because I know that if I left any comment it would be negative. So, sorry if this offends you but I think that I need to have some constructive criticism.
I have many problems with this story and all your others, and I'd like to explain it to you. Who knows, though, maybe I'm the only one that feels this way.
Your stories are interesting, complex and well written. All of the relationships are interesting and wonderful, except the relationships between Barnabas and the OC's you make. Their relationships are only awkward, out of sync and all together irritating. They remind me very much of the relationship between Edward and Bella in Twilight.
Another issue is that all your OCs (in DS stories) are virtually the same. They're quiet, withdrawn and cold. They never stand up for themselves and even when they have small bursts of bravery they are usually very stupid and could hurt themselves. Yes, they acknowledges that Barnabas is a jealous, controlling man whore in some of your stories, but they never really do anything substantial about it and quickly forgive him. They ignore his faults and let him get away with hurting them.
Barnabas' relationships with Angelique, Julia, his parents and other characters are very interesting and I would root for anyone except your OC's. The reason I keep reading your stories is both because the other relationships are great and I keep thinking that you will finally break out of your OC stereotypes, but you never do. It's such a shame because you really are a fantastic writer and I mean that, but I really wish you would give the OC a different personality. I know that is hard, because writing is a reflection of yourself, but it would make your story so much more interesting.
I have a few other things to note as well...
I've realized that your language style is casual and you don't care too much about keeping to the time periods but rather to have the audience understand, which is fine, but Abby speaks like she's from the 18th century, not 2000. Just something to note.
Last thing, and then I swear I'm done, is that some situations make no sense at all. Especially the ending scenes with Angelique. She usually is in places she has no reason to be, like the ending of Age of Innocence. The endings would be better if they made more practical sense.
I know that you've stopped writing but if you actually read this I would love a response! I know this sounded like pure hate on your story but I do really love your writing.
| WildVericia chapter 27 . 2/2/2014
I have been reading a lot of your stories and finally decided to stop being lazy and review. I love them all! They are all stunning and breath taking in my opinion. I also love the ending I think it's beautiful! I have spent a lot of time reading your stories when I should be studying haha. I really enjoyed every bit!
| Senshi of Earth chapter 9 . 1/23/2014
I love the courtship reference you threw in there...very sly and very romantic :-)
| Daily Sinner chapter 27 . 12/20/2013
OMG! I READ THIS IN LIKE FOUR HOURS! I HAVE NO LIFE!
| Lilmix-Goddess chapter 27 . 11/15/2013
Is Ben barnabas in human form or is he some other human that look like him ... I'm confused
| Mistia chapter 27 . 9/24/2013
Well I like your version of Barnebas, I always felt he deserved his "punishment". He was cruel to Angelique.
| Mistia chapter 14 . 9/24/2013
Hmm, looks like an old acquaintance is showing up
| TheUndeadPlayer chapter 2 . 9/23/2013
im hooked :D
| Sorceress of the Trees chapter 27 . 8/9/2013
This was a good one.
It wasn't sad.
It was one of those endings that you wished you had more but know you won't get it.
| SpringBorn chapter 27 . 7/9/2013
Oh wow. This was sad but touching as well and beautifully written. I had the sneaky suspicion that Barnabas didn't really die in here but that's probably just me. Great last chapter
| Guest chapter 27 . 6/29/2013
I'm glad that you wrote a happy ending for Abby with someone who is, for all intents and purposes, the blond clone of our favorite vampire. Speaking of which, since there WAS a full-on sex scene (read it on you livejournal page and loved it), I admit that it would've been nice to have seen a baby come out of that. Like, I can totally picture a little toddler, following Abby around the gallery, maybe saying to Ben, "You look like my daddy", or something. It would've made the transition a little bit easier to understand and take. Maybe...who knows, if the creative juices come back to you for this story...you could write a slightly-alternative ending for this story, using that idea. Just a suggestion. Loved the story anyway, though.
| Courtney chapter 1 . 6/23/2013
I just want to say in the movie, I didn't feel the love. I watched it all like 20 minutes ago. It's fair to say that I did not, and was like "hurry up, hurry up, hurry up." The movie itself was amazing. The romance aspect, no. And I'm super excited to read this because its AU. I feel you'll be able to do the romance aspect better.:D
| MusicOfMyMind chapter 27 . 3/31/2013
| Dora Noakes chapter 27 . 2/24/2013
Oh my god... that was beautiful, the ending actually made me cry... This was a fantastic story.
| YourMagicWhiteRabbit chapter 4 . 2/7/2013
such a lovely story!