Reviews for The 17th: Rubber Rooms and Deadlines
Anla'shok chapter 20 . 11/24/2012
The obituary is really a nice idea. It made me much sadder all of a sadden. Nice touch.

Tyman got himself killed. He asked for it. I can't say I'm sorry for him. even if hadn't killed that girl, he's insufferable.

Lucia's attack had me laughing again. There is something so wrong with me, but come on, it's so absurd that it's tragically funny. I'm still sorry she died.

Ouch, Ruby's death was painful to read.

Newt's way of getting Chandler to calm down was genius. You blew my mind with that riddle.
Anla'shok chapter 19 . 11/24/2012
Interesting arena, let's see how crazy it gets.
Alec killing the boy he tripped over had me gaping. That was harsh. But it's the Games and it's Alec...
The last Two POVs were my favorite. They're both intense but they're opposites.
Flavia is the unhinged murderer that toys with tributes and Skyford is so human that it's gripping.
I'm also surprised Athena didn't kill Flavia at this point. I know Careers don't tend to murder each other during the bloodbath but Flavia has just shown she isn't reliable.

"Then my soul does break free and I don't see anymore, don't feel anything else, and I will no longer exist."
I would have removed that sentence because you went from a very emotional scene to a full cliche with the guy still narrating when he's dead (especially since he thinks about Bay after that). It's okay, but as constructive criticism go, I'd stop at Camilla's tears (a poignant detail).
Anla'shok chapter 18 . 11/24/2012
Okay, while sweet, I can't help by strongly disagree with the numbers you're putting forward in the first scene. Now I'm supposing Tarpeia is not unbelievably rich and that she is correct when she says part of her savings is enough to keep a tribute from starving a day or two in the Games.
That would mean that ten mildly generous adult sponsors would guarantee you a banquet or awesome medicine.
Capitolites probably all sponsor someone, I mean the Games is the best moment of the year and they're used to spending for all kind of entertainment. There are thousand of them. If it just takes one rich guy to give a starving tribute what he needs, tributes would have parachutes all the time. Statistically, at least three quarters of the tributes will appeal to at least a handful of people and most tributes don't get more than one sponsor gift.

I'd say the amounts of money needed to get tributes stuff are enormous and get even greater when you reach the end of the Games, that way the Capitol can fund the next year's arena and sponsor gifts remain something rather rare. And it means the Districts can sponsor but, because of the amount of money it takes, their sponsoring has little impact.

I know I probably think things through more than the great majority of people, but I can't help it.

For a human to treat another human the way that the Capitol treats the districts, they have to believe that their victim is not a human
Ansolutely, it's the basis of strong racism. Capitolites are well fed, healthy and dress richly. District people are ugly and skinny compared to them, made old by hard work and bad nourishment. besides, they have different accents and dress very differently. Why is it so odd the Capitol sees them as lesser beings? It's what happened with the american indians and the black africans. If you look at history, the Capitol's attitude isn't so unbelievable.

We're all kids, not trained executioners
That's debatable lol. A kid can be a trained executioner. I also liked Athena's epiphany about the Games actually being dangerous.

I loved Blue's sequence. his nightmare is so vivid and filled with emotions and then when he wakes he's really intense but also very controlled.

I think watching Daddy kill my family members counts as traumatic, but right now the discovery is worse.
That sentence is EPIC. I burst out laughing. This poor girl is so messed up.

And while she's got her eyes closed, I take over.
Shouldn't this sentence be in italics?

Now the Games!
Anla'shok chapter 17 . 11/24/2012
The title for this chapter is highly ironical considering interview night is where the tributes should be lying for their lives.

I always wondered why Career tributes had to do more than simply polish their angle. I mean, if you're serious about volunteering (Grey has an excuse here), you also practice interviews and angle, not just waving big swords around. You have to adapt it to the competition but still, the Careers should have 85% of the stuff already ready. Then again, it's only the 17th Games, maybe training is not so advanced in the districts.

Someone had fun with Grey's stylist and prep team ROFL

"She doesn't say a single thing of any value in the entire interview. Huh. Mysterious. "
I don't agree. It's stupid because unless you're drop dead gorgeous or look damn strong, keeping silent will make you very forgettable. Which might also be Neon's angle since she's sure not to become someone's target by saying anything that could upset another tribute or make her popular.

Alex was fun but he doesn't make me want to spend a sizable chunk of money to sponsor him because he said nothing that made him a winner. But he is interesting and were I in the audience, I'd probably remember him.

"Speechless, eh? Clever answer, boy! I know I'd be tongue-tied if I were going into the arena!"
Octavius is damn good at his job and Chandler is hysterical despite himself.
Another not-forgettable tribute that hasn't given me a reason to sponsor him.

Trust the Capitol to shove in Laken's face that she has multiple personalities. I feel sorry for her, they just branded her a freak and left her to freak out. Actually, why didn't you make her freak out and Merry take over so that Laken doesn't remember what happened at the interviews? That would have been fun!

Cenia tells us an edited version of her life. meh, who cares, although her thought process is good. But then she metaphorically gives the Capitol the finger by supporting Alec. It's daring and kinda sweet but I doubt it'll gain her sponsors. i doubt she really gives a damn though now.
Why would the Capitol have a problem with Alec being evil? I'd have liked a bit more detail there.

The part on District 12 bothers me a bit.
The interviews are an amazing occasion for a tribute to make a nation-wide rebellious statement. Now, either Capitolites accept that some people are rebellious because, after all, they've lived through the Dark Days and still consider the Districts they're enemies, or rebellious tributes truly shock people, in which case Octavius should have a way of getting the tributes to shut up if they started being rebellious.

But otherwise, I totally get the way the tributes behaved (even if the girl is putting her family at risk) and it was good.
Anla'shok chapter 16 . 11/24/2012
It's always interesting to see how gamemakers reason. It's rare to have the D2 tributes as the weakest of the Career pack but after their reapings it makes sense.

I loved the pig roasting scene, way to make a real impression xD
I felt so sorry for the girl who tripped in her own snare, but is was so funny. (I'm evil).

Tyman is going to be insufferable with his 8 if Athena doesn't chuck Gray out. Or she'll just tell him she simply doesn't like him
Anla'shok chapter 15 . 11/24/2012
Lucia is 12? How did I miss that? Anyway the crazy kid and the rich snob are happy together. Well they're fun, although I doubt their efficiency in the Games.

Do you have morals?"
lol, what kind of question is that?

I think Merry comes out when she's freaking out only- and Laken doesn't even realize it.
Oh that's all right then, it's not like Laken will freak out at the bloodbath or anything... lol

Luis is smart and he's right to fear that a big alliance will make him a target. On the other hand he did tell a career to go screw himself, so he's already targeted...

I really liked Luis' POV.

"I was talking to her and she's determined to get home."
While the others are just here to commit suicide... Sorry, I just get sarcastic sometimes
It's interesting how Career training is better organized than the others' seem to be.

but even I could tell she wanted me for my brains.
Either that or she's an idiot, which doesn't help Newt's chances.

Aww, cute to see the D11 tributes stick together.
Anla'shok chapter 14 . 11/24/2012
The first two scenes were my favorite even if they're all really good in terms of character development.
I just can't help laughing when I read Lucia, she's bonkers but fun.
The Career dynamics are also fun, everyone (me included) wonders why Alex is there but since he doesn't look dangerous they don't really care. I'm finally getting an idea of what Camilla is like.

She's wearing a bright blue two-piece swimsuit. I'm not particularly interested, though. Romance is dumb in the Games.
He doesn't let himself check out a girl because he doesn't want a relationship with her? Wow, if guys only checked out the girls they thought they might date there would be a lot less ogling in the streets...

The other parts were a rather depressing, as well, they should be.

What right does the Capitol have to do this to us? And furthermore, what right do they have to use it as entertainment?
Isn't that the questions you ask yourself when you watch your first hunger games, or maybe when your twelve, after you survive your first reaping? Maybe he's ranting because none of the answers he was given were satisfactory.
Anla'shok chapter 13 . 11/24/2012
Alex is a great character by why in heaven does he volunteer? Is it because he feels life is bland compared to the characters in plays and the Games are the most epic thing he can participate in? It's a bit messed up even if I agree his acting skills will come in handy.

Camilla is not in the best of moods, wants to go home but is trained so she probably volunteered. She watches the reapings dispassionately which isn't so surprising considering she has prepared for this. Otherwise there is not much to go on from this scene.

The description of the train was very beautiful.
Anla'shok chapter 12 . 11/24/2012
Laken needs analyst care. I was speechless at the way she shrugged off her father's behavior despite her explaining how her brain is a boss at denial.
The way she screws with the escort's brain is hysterical but the fact she's probably not faking is terrifying.

Rowne I didn't get much about from the reaping except he has issues with his family and his sister is cute. I hope to get more in the Capitol
Anla'shok chapter 11 . 11/24/2012
Blue shaken awake by the Games. It's believable and original (although that's what happened to KAtniss' mum, but it's not used in tributes so much). I guess we'll need to wait for the Capitol part to see his real non-depressed personality.

I think the first paragraph says all there is to say about Ruby, even if the rests develops it nicely. I'll surprised she has no "friends" who come to visit. After all she seems the kind of person that is easily flattered and that you could use.
A spoiled rich girl who feels superior, is terrified and disgusted by poverty, worships the Capitol because they are all so pretty and rich and party all the time but isn't so blind as not to recognize death is kinda sad.
She's slap worthy too.
Anla'shok chapter 10 . 11/24/2012
A hotheaded Career who nevertheless made me laugh. The alliance is just going to love having him around (insert sarcasm). !P

Athena is doubtless competent but she seems very ignorant. If she wants to know if the Games can change you, why doesn't she just ask the victors' relatives or friends or just observe the victors themselves. She'll be a threat but she's not so clever.
I feel much more sorry fro her mother than for her...
Anla'shok chapter 9 . 11/24/2012
A rebellious teen with paranoid tendencies. A rather intense personal lie too. Nice.

The guy who invented the name Careers is getting reaped? I'm now very curious as to how he gets the trained tributes to keep that title.
His family isn't the coolest, but I like how it's complex and not all bad.
"Putting the length of cord around my neck"
I pictured him putting a noose or thick rope around his neck, as if he was hanging himself. And laughed. Yeah, I'm a bit weird...
If I keep my distance I'll come out of the Hunger Games whole and safe.
he's sure he can tackle on anyone as long as he doesn't get emotionally involved. Interesting.
Anla'shok chapter 8 . 11/24/2012
Neon is kind of hyper. Nah, she's totally hyper, in a cute way. The exclation mark count for her part was crazy lol. I feel for her, more than most of the other 'tragically reaped normal girls' , it must be her bubbliness.

imagine if I went in the Games with unfinished business at home!
Priorities, dude.
Okay we've got an oblivious and thick-skinned nerd here. he's a passionate as a wooden spoon but he'll be fun to read about. And it's Newt. Well, it's going to be interesting to see how he pulls it off...
Anla'shok chapter 7 . 11/24/2012
Karlie is attractive and rather loud (at least with her family). Okay

As usual the reaping scenes are not boring at all and very well written, it's just I try to focus on what we learn on the tribute's personality.

Tyman is cocky and obnoxious. He's obviously got some muscle too. Lots of inter-tribute interaction potential with him, although I'm half hoping he'll get slapped.
He's fun in his way though.
Anla'shok chapter 6 . 11/24/2012
I think it would be awesome if you made a SYOT and then made your only self-submitted tribute win, no one would expect it. lol. people might not submit again though...

A normal hardworking girl. The supportive characters (escort, adventurous 12yo) were more original but you don't have to be deranged and extremely entertaining by yourself to have interesting dynamics with the other tributes.

Skyford had me gaping the whole time. He's crazy, sure it was a selfless moment of rashness, but still. At least it was the other's mum who was sick or the poor woman would feel like she murdered her son (instead of someone else's. That's just twisted) . It makes a bit more sense when I saw he was 13 but still, I couldn't believe what I was reading.
A very original way to get a tribute to volunteer? Valerian is one lucky bastard
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