|Reviews for A Knife in the Gut|
| Chelsea Hunger Games Fan chapter 6 . 7/17/2013
That last part was really funny
| FScSeG0403 chapter 1 . 12/12/2012
Are you done with this story or what?
| iloverueforever chapter 1 . 8/14/2012
Heres my review
1. Other: I love how you referred to when she was younger! It made the story more interesting,
2. Character:I love how u wrote this story so well that, at the first couple of words I knew it was from Clove's POV! Good job on expressing her!
3. Writing: Your words flowed together and it was very entertaining!
4. Opening: The opening kept me hooked and continues entertaining me through out the whole chapter! I love how you ended it as well :D
| jakey121 chapter 2 . 8/13/2012
Here is my review, sorry I thought I'd jump to the reaping cause this is the bit I am most interested to read since it's from Clove's POV:D
Characters: In my opinion you really captured who Clove is in this, she seemed just as sadistic yet normal as well, because although careers are sadistic they still are human. I love all the other characters you brought into this, giving us a look into her life in the District. Her mother is just horrid but realistic for a D2 mother, her friends are great and I love the escort and the fact that you commented that richer districts don't get the good escorts.
Ending: I loved the last line, it really summed up everything and once again went back to the fact that she is a human girl, with proper emotions and she does doubt herself, which is natural. She's going into the Hunger Games and you wrote her conflicting emotions perfectly, it was believable and not over the top :)
Dialogue: Once again you make things realistic, the dialogue with her mother was really good because it captured their strained relationship and made it really clear how the two of them get along. It's good that she does act different with other people, I have read some stories where the character has roughly the same kind of speaking style with everyone they talk to which isn't what's supposed to happen. She was different with her friends, different with her mother and different with her inner thoughts which I really loved ;D
Scene: The reaping was my favourite, it's interesting to see what Clove and Cato's reaping was like. It was different with the fact that she was reaped anyway which I like, and I loved her first thoughts on Cato, it is a good job those two are allies because he really is massive, and someone to fear.
Your writing is just superb :D
| District11-Olive chapter 1 . 8/10/2012
Wow, just wow I really love your opening chapter!
Scene: I really loved the scene when she first began her knives, you showed that she wasn't always perfect with them and that practice was necessary. In that scene you managed to capture her determination and I really loved that you also were able to show her temper, Clove's trademark really.
Ending: The ending makes me want to read on, which I will be! It leads into the next chapter without having me crying myself to sleep because it's a cliffhanger. In your own right this was a powerful ending
Writing: I think the writing was wonderful but could definitly use a bit of inprovement. I feel that your use of adjectives felt a bit forced and unnatural and didn't really help in the flow of your writing. For example "the glint of the metal, the sharp, serrated blade." i am not sure but this did not have great flow.
Enjoyment: I enjoyed this piece very much and I look forward to reading the rest as soon as I'm done with this review! The way you gave Clove new dimensions and levels while still remaining true to her character was brilliant and I expect great things from your Thirteen chapters!
| FScSeG0403 chapter 2 . 8/8/2012
| overstreets chapter 1 . 8/2/2012
I like the first line of this story - the way that Clove has pretty much always known the Career life; how she was going to Volunteer because she was a Career and that's what they did. The way that you describe the bloodbath was also amazing, not gonna lie. I really love your characterisation of Clove!
| HeartOfParadise chapter 3 . 7/31/2012
I really enjoyed the banter between the mentors and the tributes; the personalities of each shone through quite well. Morla seems so nice, and I feel as though she'll do a lot of good to Clove. The confusion of feelings Clove has about her mother and her relationship with her is continued nicely; so all in all another good chapter!
| truces chapter 1 . 7/29/2012
Not bad. It was a bit short, and didn't give much personality and motivations to Clove other than "sadist", so I hope in the next chapters you expand her personality a little. There were some good lines though that I really enjoyed, my favorite was "All I know is perfection." because that really described a Career in entirety for me. Keep writing!
| Ninazadzia chapter 2 . 7/28/2012
Nice chapter, all in all. I love me some Cato, so reading scenes like these where he volunteers is always a delight :D I don't have the greatest sense of Clove's characterization just yet (what are her motives? why does she want this? etc.) but it's only the second chapter so I'm sure you develop that later on. All in all, another good chapter.
| Guest chapter 5 . 7/27/2012
Love it please update!
| Flight of the Mockingjays chapter 2 . 7/26/2012
I knew just from the title of the first Chapter - "The Discovery of the Knife" - that this would be great. I really love that chpater as well, brings you right up to speed in super quick time so that the Games can begin.
You have a very practical, straight-forwards way of telling the story which makes it highly readable. I believe it is a good reflection on how I imagine Clove's mind to be. It will be interesting to see if her narration becomes more emotion orientated towards the Games, or whether she remains to single minded killing machine you are building her up to be.
I also love the relationship she has with her mother. Almost makes you wonder if it is really Clove who wants this, or pushy parents that have made her think she does.
I did notice a couple of arkward sentences, like "if my trainer Nolin were to be here" and "you will probably allies". It might be worth going through and reading it out loud, its easier to find mistakes that way. This is all easy to fix though and when you sorted it out you will be left with a very strong story.
A really good start, and I am looking forwards to seeing how this progresses.
-Flight of the Mockingjays
| DeadAccountNoLongerInUse chapter 3 . 7/24/2012
I'll be interested to see how Clove's perception of Katniss goes...
I like that you mentioned Clove's feelings about her mother again and the uncertainty about it all. I still do wonder, though, about the first chapter, which is a lot different than the rest of the story so far in terms of mood. Consistency is always important, but it's even better to have character development, as we are seeing.
Anyways, I don't have much to say this time so good job!
| Guest chapter 5 . 7/24/2012
pls write more and fast
| The Whispering Panda chapter 2 . 7/23/2012
Another great chapter!
One thing to watch for, though: You switch tenses a lot. Choose one; present or past, and stick with it.
Other than that, your writing is still amazing!