Reviews for The Maelstrom and Deathberry - The 1st Act
Six Foot Assassin chapter 8 . 8/31
The amount of nonsense written within these chapters is high.
Six Foot Assassin chapter 3 . 8/31
Started reading and there are already a few things that don't make sense.
Dragunav chapter 3 . 4/4
what?

"why should i follow you?"
"we just saved your life"

that is actually a really bad choice from your part. He's in an unknown place, has no idea who either of these groups are and both of them wants him to come along.

and he's not even suspicious about the second group who might aswell be trying to capture him for the same reasons as the first.

this is stupid.
Guest chapter 33 . 2/11
Instead of using expletive for swear words it would be better to just use asterix or leave them out completely because i found that expletive was quite annoying
King of the Gods2015 chapter 2 . 1/23
your story is a boring piece of dirt
WolkaiserDrake chapter 29 . 12/25/2015
ok, we need more of narutos pranks
StoneTheLoner chapter 2 . 9/29/2015
I know you said not to criticize this heavily, but I just cant get over how convenient it is that Ichigo has a vision of him, or that everyone important to the story seems to have noticed his arrival. It could have been a good opportunity to introduce us to your version of Naruto, and also show us how he reacts to this new world. Instead, you rush right into dialogue with other characters. I would also suggest you get rid of the *Naruto stares with an intense rage*, part. Lets face it, he is a ninja. Getting attacked without an explanation is kind of expected in that line of work. For it to evoke an "Intense rage" as fast as it did, was unnatural. Rage was already too strong a word for that scene, making it even worse that you also used intense.
ProudlyANoob chapter 6 . 7/23/2015
Hm, I like! Kenja in shikai reminds me of Ang's staff from Avaatar : last air bender. But how is that he can handle ichigos bankai state just after learning shikai?
ProudlyANoob chapter 1 . 7/23/2015
I just started reading this story of yours, is this one written by yourself? Or is it also co-written? I'll give you more feedback when I've read more!
GreenDragon03 chapter 42 . 5/12/2015
When is act 2?
jmac615 chapter 42 . 5/9/2015
Hahaha funny Q&A from you and kurama! Can't wait for act 2
marquis.shax chapter 35 . 4/23/2015
you made a small mistake since the Uzumakis weren't from Takigakure (waterfall) they were from Uzushiogakure (Whirlpool) and that's the place that was destroyedd
marquis.shax chapter 22 . 4/23/2015
actually it's possible but most likely extremely dangerous/difficult to learn sage mode without having to go to the slugs/snakes/toads considering Hashirama was able to learn sage mode on his own and I believe his sage mode was more powerful than the other 3 versions (although I've NEVER once seen someone learn sage mode from the slugs so Kishi dropped the ball on that one as well lol)
Athena chapter 42 . 4/18/2015
This entire story was absolutely awesome, amazing, five stars, all of that crap! When are you going to post the first chapter of the 2nd Act? I need to know!
ZERO chapter 28 . 4/17/2015
When's chapter 43 and 44?
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