Reviews for Forsaken
Flyingshadow451 chapter 3 . 5/27/2015
This is such a cool story idea! I wish you would continue!
didier chapter 3 . 12/2/2004
nice story ,hope you continuing writing it .it will be interesting to know where the story will go .

just try to move the story along a little faster

peace (war)
a chapter 3 . 10/17/2004
its good to see a fic that about mousse,considering how he written in most fics. don't spend to much time going over events that happen before.

can;t wait for the next update.
Materia-Blade chapter 3 . 10/6/2004
not bad. One of the few stories out there that feature mousse. He's not a very well like charcater. (And I bet you 90% of why is his glasses) Nice fic. I'll be waitin for the next chapter.
vedmid chapter 3 . 10/5/2004
nice chapter... I like Paul, he and Mousse sohuld be an interesting team
vedmid chapter 2 . 10/5/2004
I'm really happy to see this updated. I like the tone you've set for this. I've seen a fair numbe rof "shampoo goes to far" stories but none quite like this. I hope you update it again soon
askthedonkey chapter 3 . 10/4/2004
I have to say i am really happy about this fic. After reading 20 or so stories about Ranma and his adventures its nice to read a good story about another character in ranma1/2.

Please keep up the good work as i hope to see another chapter soon.
Cesia and Chi chapter 3 . 10/4/2004
Not bad! I haven't read a story that based mousse as the protaganist before so this was interesting. Dang Shampoo is evil in this fic. I like so keep up the good work! ~Cesia
bd chapter 1 . 7/26/2003

Wow. That has to be one of the most twisted OOC pieces I've read in a while. And you even threw in an ANC as well. Racist and a mutilator. At least you didn't pull any bashing punches. Make sure to mention the Amazon tendency to assault children and bite the heads off puppies.
Chickentoss chapter 1 . 7/24/2003
Oh, dear! This is bound to be interesting. Shampoo always seemed a little violent to me. Wonderful capture of her 'maniacal' side! My, I think I'm beginning to enjoy this Sherman character... I've always liked darts, and old men who can use them. Can't wait to read the more! _
Anomymous chapter 2 . 7/23/2003

I like stories where Mousse actually understands his situation with Shampoo

Your story is great!

Keep going!
Maric chapter 2 . 7/22/2003
Thanks for giving me credit_ This story is getting better. Please keep writing more.
ShakaZulu chapter 1 . 9/15/2002
definetly interesting... where's it gonna go from here i wonder, considering this is the first fic Ive seen that intros a non-asian/caucasian character... keep it up
GenmaThedestroyer chapter 1 . 6/13/2002
Hey man!

Just thought I'd track your story down. Still looking good.

If you want me to help you with any other stories just pm me about it at the message boards kay?
lostfyrefli chapter 1 . 6/11/2002
Okay I have just a few problems with your story. 1) Why in the world is the Nekohaten open at 12 in the morning? I know that Shampoo and Cologne are great amazons but they too need their sleep. This makes it sound unrealistic. If this had happned right before closing maybe at 9 or 10 and Mousse walked around moping in his sorrow til he got to the tracks, I think it would work better.

2) Okay, I'll give that Shampoo is ANNOYED very much by Mousse's behavior. But I don't think she'd ever actually go out and try to kill him. Plus if he was gone, who would she take out her frustrations on?

3) Cologne has over 100 yrs of knoweldge and skills. If she wanted to kill Mousse or as you put see his blood on the ground, she could easily do so any time and anywhere.

4)The hatred that you have Shampoo and Cologne show at Mousse doesn't seem realistic. Even though he might be annoying, and male, he's still an important factor in the amazon culture it self.

Other then those factors, I like the idea you're using. I haven't seen this idea used before, at least not on Mousse...I don't think.

Lastly, you might want to have someone preread your story to catch little grammar mistakes.
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