|Reviews for Ice Age Journeys: Two Roads, One Destination v2|
| DiegoRedeemedLover chapter 2 . 8/11/2013
[To Manny however, he still found him all but troublesome.]
Yup, that's Manny :P 'Yes, I will help you out but don't expect me to be *nice* to you since I don't know why I did it in the first place" *grumble grumble*
[And then it finally hit him. The biggest place he didn't bother checking first: the wall of stone beside where they made their camp. The peculiar sight was all he needed to completely recollect.
"Hey Manny," Diego called out while looking at the drawing. "You still up?"
"Urrrghh… just because I can easily carry an unconscious animal for the entire day doesn't mean I don't get tired," Manny complained. "This better be important."
"How important do you think this is?" Diego points with his head the drawing on the wall.
Manny wipes his eyes with his trunk, still a bit half-asleep. After a few seconds, he sees the drawing. "Hey now, will you look at that."
It was a poor drawing of a sloth etched on the wall. It's weathered and old, making it slightly less visible. And it didn't help at the dark of the night. It was the same one Sid made back then when they had Pinky.
"This was just the place Sid first found out how to make a fire," Diego said. "Which kind makes me wish he was here to make one."
"And the same place where Pinky took his first steps," Manny added in a delighted tone. "Really brings us back, huh partner?"]
Awwwwww 3 (by the way, you slipped out of tense again here - was that intentional?) But don't mind that, oh man, that scene gave me all the Original movie feels! (That's a Tumblr expression :s)
[Peaches lifted her trunk to feel a brushing over her fur. "There's wind coming from that direction," she answered. "That means there is an exit over there."
"Wow!" Sid said in awe. "How did you know that?"
"Uncle Diego taught me," Peaches said with a smile.]
That is such a well-written little scene, and I love how it's shown that Diego told something Peaches so essential :D Also yay Diego/Peaches uncle/niece bonding yessssssss (sorry I'm just really hungry for more of THAT and it's so scarce in this archive. :( )
Oooh, good cliffhanger haha!
| DiegoRedeemedLover chapter 1 . 8/11/2013
I wonder how I missed this rewrite... first thing, I sincerely love the original, remember, so don't think too badly of yourself ;) Even back when you were first starting out writing, what I saw from you said "quality" to me :D
I do have a bit of concrit though... spell out numbers, don't place them into your writing like this: 3 since it's kind of distracting. Also, be careful with tenses! I know it's easy to slip in and out of present tense and past (especially, if, like me, you're starting to write in third person present more often since it's FUN BECAUSE IMMEDIACY) but then it can get really difficult to manage tenses, but those are the only grammatical errors I'll flag, since your writing is so good that you don't really notice the few mistakes ;)
Also I love your foreshadowing with Diego's story to Sid and his warnings not to tell it to Manny :P Oh Diego, always looking out for Manny... :)
| AngeliqueRox chapter 6 . 8/20/2012
Please update soon!
| Buckrocks -READ PROFILE chapter 6 . 7/23/2012
| KaylaDestroyer chapter 6 . 7/23/2012
Awesome chapter! This was a really intriguig chapter with Roshan and all; wwill his tribe be added with their own adventure this time? Actually it's been so long since I read the last one that I don't remember the role he played, but I'm sure it wil be even better in this version! So basically Peaches and her group ent on the left path, and Ellie and her group went on the right path? Oh dear, how will this turn out? Update soon!
| Guest chapter 5 . 7/16/2012
Can't wait for more!
that was cute...
| Buckrocks -READ PROFILE chapter 5 . 7/15/2012
Update soon! :)
| yellowraccoon chapter 1 . 7/14/2012
Dude, this is awesome!
To be honest, I actually never read your original story (I always saw it around, but never read it), but this is incredible. I mean, your dialog and character interactions is TOP NOTCH! No matter what is said, you put it in a way that is natural to each character (I usually don't say that because I can't do it that well...).
And that brings me to the dialog - very good. The way Diego not only tells his depressing story, but also attempts to apologize afterward is pretty natural to him.
Oh yeah, and Scrat was fun to read. He's harder to write for than it looks, and i commend you for that.
Speaking of which, Sid is also surprisingly tough (being that he doesn't have a lot of emotional impact and is quite static), but you have him down:
["Let's see. There are 7 people in our herd. Manny, Ellie, Peaches, Diego, Crash or Eddie, Crash or Eddie" Sid sid while walking around pointing at them. He accounted each individual with a finger as he counted. "W-wait! That's just 6 people!"
Manny slapped his forehead. "Uhhh... Sid."
"Yes Manny?" glanced Sid.
"You forgot to count yourself," he dictated.]
That is perfect. Seriously, I laughed out loud...quite literally. Not only that, I can imagine Manny reacting like that, with that tone of voice and everything XD
As you said, the situation is a bit abrupt, but how else is this gonna get started! But seriously, it didn't get in the way. I'm pumped for the next chapter!
Here and there there are a few spelling and grammatical mistakes, but they're few and far between. No problem, everybody's fingers slip up.
So, final thoughts, I'm reading this! All of it! Yay! This is awesome, and I like where this is going...possibly with something to do with Buck... :D
On to the next chapter!
| KaylaDestroyer chapter 5 . 7/14/2012
Awesome chapter! Yay, Sid has reassured himself of his abilities when handling Peaches! Can't wait to see what happens next with our three groups traveling through perilous situations! Update soon!
| Buckrocks -READ PROFILE chapter 4 . 7/4/2012
Update soon! :)
| Buckrocks -READ PROFILE chapter 1 . 7/4/2012
Whoa whoawhoawhoawhoawhoa! AWESOME DUDE!
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/4/2012
Hindi ka rin sinipag, ha. :) -Jake Voltaire
| KaylaDestroyer chapter 4 . 7/2/2012
Awesome chappie! I think you did a great job on Nia's new character; I can't wait to see more of her! And hopefully Ryan will be interesting too; it looks like most or all of the characters will be more in-depth, so maybe we'll get to see a little more of Nia's father and why he tried to kill Ryan. Also, I think when you said 'uniting two packs into was', I think you might have meant to insert 'one' there, but no biggie. Just something I noticed. :) Update soon! :D
| KaylaDestroyer chapter 3 . 6/30/2012
Awesome chapter! I can't quite remember everything that happened, so update the new and improved version soon! :D
| KaylaDestroyer chapter 2 . 6/30/2012
I love the disclaimer at the end! Also, I noticed you said 'unto' and I think due to the context of the rest of the sentance it should have been 'on to'. I don't remember which sentance it was. I just remember the word. Great chapter! I like the revisations! (or whatever the word is)