Reviews for F r e e
writhen heart .inactive chapter 1 . 12/1/2013
This was gorgeous. An absolutely stunning freeverse which was really complimented by the formatting.
starlight.moon.princess chapter 1 . 2/22/2013
This is a really nice freeverse :)

I loved the way you've formatted this, especially the
[\ /

– sun –

/ \]
It adds so much to story.
Overall, it's a really nice little story. Well done :)
TayaCurragh chapter 1 . 7/16/2012
Aw, cute story. I like the way you've styled some of the words in ways I haven't seen before, like the sun and the stares. The theme of being free is nice, considering what the pairing is, and I think you've used the prompt of summer well :)
lella7 chapter 1 . 7/15/2012
Lovely and summery, and your little suns were very cute :) I love the part at the end about understanding more than he actually says as it really brings out their closeness. Good job :)
HedwigBlack chapter 1 . 7/14/2012
I'm beginning to like freeverses. I used to not like them at all mostly because I found the format more distracting than anything. But this was done really well and I like the pairing a lot. My favorite part was toward the end when he asks why but means Whydothingshavetochange? It's that fine line between what was said and what was meant and it's great that they are close enough that they know the difference. nice one :)
Mr Bellatrix Lestrange chapter 1 . 7/11/2012
Free verse. Addicting as well. Fun to read, fun to write. Especially when your writers come up with amazing little ways of doing it and it comes out being like this. And it's second person. That deserve a lot of virtual cookies, I think.

The actual story is really, very beautiful. It's about the coming-of-age type of loss, and the Sun represents the child-like innocence, the warmth, the protection because you don't need to hide yourself when it's just you and him and the "Summer Sun." Summer in literature focuses on possibilities that can be acted out. It's a high time of life for most things, and it's very peaceful. All those things were acted out in this.

(But, well, you can't deny that whispers *h*u*r*t*) It's one of those things that I guess I never think about. The fact that two boys being together in a school is undoubtedly going to raise some teases. Some "whispers" and "stares" and the fact that your Rem and Sirius find a way to get away from that is beautiful. Because it's easy to just brush off. But they can't deny that it is hard. I like how it's "never stopped" them though.



underneath) I like this, how underneath is actually, well, underneath words. It's a little bit of freeverse that really works.

(strands) Actually, this whole thing is sort of like a picture book. And the freeverse is explaining every little thing that can be explained in characters. Like how "stopped" periods, our literature version of... stops. And the sun and the underneath and... stopbeingsoamazing! That must've taken a while! But no, probably not. You're too cool for school, and it probably to you five minutes. I am seriously marveling at your talent right now. I'm throwing kudos at you, can't you feel the appreciation! Yes, this was simply... yes.
Marauder-In-Disguise chapter 1 . 7/9/2012
Another freeverse from you! Love love love it :)
awakeatnight chapter 1 . 7/8/2012
Wow. This was REALLY good. I feel like you captured them perfectly. Loved it.
ShowerCurtainsTurnMeOn chapter 1 . 7/7/2012
Loved this :)
The sun was cute.
flawsmadebeautiful chapter 1 . 7/7/2012
I really liked the sun ones...where you made a sun, that’s really really neat. I loved the freeverse, and usually they just confuse me.
MissingMommy chapter 1 . 7/7/2012
Have I told you how much I adore freeverse? Well, now I have.

The thing you did with the sun and "[in]take" and "O.o (stares) O.o" were rather genious.

Sirius/Remus is just plain awesome.

Typo time: "fingerTip" - I'm not sure why the "t" is capitalized because I don't see any significance behind it.

But overall, gorgeous. :D