Reviews for The Revival Of The Clan
AraelDranoth chapter 2 . 11/4/2016
... I'm sorry it's not for me at all. The plot idea is a good one but the character is... quite bland and the whole secret Uchiha angle is seriously overused.

At this point it's safe to say that Sasuke and Naruto are perhaps the most powerful shinobi in the world. I'm talking ridiculously OP so I think that even attempting the line 'even you would have trouble defeating her' is a pointless effort as it can be said that all the most powerful shinobi were on the frontlines of the war and since she wasn't. It's so exhausting seeing OC's automatically being able to beat or at least hold their own against OP characters when they really shouldn't be able to if their writers just thought logically about it.

I'm sorry if I sound harsh, I'm not trying to flame you but inform you of the errors I noticed. Hopefully you can see this as constructive criticism.
Good luck to you and keep on writing.
AraelDranoth chapter 1 . 11/4/2016
Hmmm... I really don't think that first person POV was the way to go here as I found it just reads like a poor self insert. But I'm willing to give it a go.
The King in White chapter 39 . 10/23/2015

That was a pretty enjoyable read. I could have gone with a more Japanese name than Aelia for your OC, but otherwise, it was really good.

The only thing I'd raise issue with is more on the realism scale rather than on writing, since the writing was pretty good. I know that you wanted to add a factor of danger and conflict in the end there with the Council kind of stepping all over everyone and holding all the cards for a while.

Keep in mind that Konoha is at the least a military junta, if not an outright military dictatorship. The Council only holds so much power as the Hokage gives them, so they don't have the capacity to force Tsunade to do anything. If they were united with a significant portion of the clans or other political groups within the village, then they could pressure Tsunade. But those two on their own, with simply ROOT? Tsunade would crush them like bugs on the military field, and on the political/legal one she could have destroyed them with impunity since the Council has made outright enemies of most if not all of Konoha's clans.
5Water chapter 1 . 11/15/2013
Hi! I came to check out your OC story! xD (Because I wanted to see it for myself.)

Your OC is very solid and I feel myself being related to her somewhat. It actually takes work for me to like an original character when I read fanfics. (Though, you know I make OCs myself.) Because some people who write OCs... it really just doesn't connect in my head. So your OC here works very well with the timeline of peace. :D Being a tool of Konoha fits the role very well too and I feel myself being pulled into the beginning of this story because of her thoughts. It makes me curious what will unfold when she begins to make new friends and new bonds.

It's lovely. I can't believe this OC is your first one and you said you don't want to make more? Too bad, but I know how you feel. It's easier to grasp characters you already know and love than to make OCs. Because in the past, in my old stories I never put up, my OCs don't stand out to me. xD So I only post stories with the ones who I know will make a successful "debut".

Well, this is all I have to share with you. Not sure if I have time to read one more of your story, due to the lack of time I will be having, but I will continue to read without telling you. 8D If I have a comment, I'll leave a review.

NeitherSaneNorInsane chapter 39 . 10/13/2013
I was soo Prepeared to go to sleep on chapter 29 because I saw the title...and it was very ominous...but I haaaaad to read it...and now an hour 1am I'm crying tears of sadness and am I going to sleep now huh!?

But anyway...this was such an amazing read and I do not regret sleeping late...this was soo worth it!
Ls UnlimitedImagination chapter 39 . 7/30/2013
Wow, this was the best fanfiction I've read so far! It's very well done and well researched. Thank you for writing this! :)
darkangle1234 chapter 22 . 7/29/2013
love the chapter ;p
ChibiCourtney chapter 39 . 3/24/2013
I read the whole story, beginning to end, in one day! It was so good. I don't mind OC stories, although I do agree that people tend to make them into mary-sues too often. I thought you did a great job. Sasuke's OOC is totally understandable. Personally, I think Sasuke would be a very loving and caring person if his clan wasn't killed. I think you captured that very well. I hope you make a sequel or at least a side story to tell us how little Itachi ends up. I was so happy he survived. I loved your story and your OC. Thank you for entertaining us all with your story.
Silver Wishes Golden Dreams chapter 38 . 3/12/2013
wolf-oo-san xD χαχαχα so Naruto!

Κολησα σ' αυτο το κεφάλαιο γειτονακι! Πολύ καλογραμένο! Και με πολύ φαντασία.b

Χαχαχαχα μπορώ να φανταστω την αντίδραση του kyubi... Δνε τα παει καλά με τα λυκάκια η αλεπουδίτσα ε?

Αχ! Πες μου οτι εφτασε η ωρα να τσαλαπατησουμε (δηλαδη αυτοι θα κανουν το τσαλαπάτημα... εγω θα περιοριστω στα πον πον xD) τους θειτσους!

Μουαχαχαχα can't wait!
Silver Wishes Golden Dreams chapter 37 . 3/12/2013
Pheww... Ετρεχα με τη σχολη και με τα κεφαλαια και για αυτο εξαφανιστηκα... pardon moi onegai (_ _)

Ενα (Γ)λυκάκι! _
Χαχαχαχα! Μα γιατί να μην χωνεύει τον κοτκοτ?
Σέλω κ εγώ ενα τέτοιοοοοοο!

Πολύ ωραιο κεφαλαιο! .
Silver Wishes Golden Dreams chapter 36 . 3/2/2013
Yeyyyyyyyyyy! chibi-Itachi-kun is okayyyyyy!
Aye sir!

Χιχιχι και επιτέλους ο κοτοπουλομαλλιας αποφάσισε να μας τιμήσει με την παρουσία του...
Χαχαχαχα συμφωνώ με την Ino that would indeed be too complex for Sasuke-chan xD

Αλλα περα απ' την πλάκα πρεπει να τα είχε παιξει τελείως ο καημενούλης (ποπο... κοτκοτ και καημενουλης στην ιδια προταση ακουγεται γελοιο... ο.Ο)
Guest chapter 39 . 3/1/2013
I read this story from beginning to end in three days. I absolutly adored it. Thank you so much for writing this. Keep it up! ;D
Silver Wishes Golden Dreams chapter 35 . 2/27/2013
Υey! Konoha power!
House arrest και βλακειες... Ουτε το μολύβι του kishi δεν τους κραταει αμα παρουν φόρα αυτοι xD

Ουφφφ... όλα θα πανε καλά ναι? Ναι! .

Xεχε, και η Αέλια και ο chibi-Itachi ειναι μια χαρά! Yokatta ne!

Χμμμμ, αλλα ακόμα δεν εχω δει την αντιδραση του κοτκοτ... Ποιος να μου το λεγε οτι θα ανηπομονούσα για το ξεσπασμα του κοτοπουλομαλλιά .'' It's your fault γειτονακι-channnn! Your writting is too good!
Yep yep I'm talking about you over there *points finger*

Αχ, ξεχασα και την πρωτη σκηνη! Τι συγκινητικη που ήταν Τ0Τ Τ0Τ Τ0Τ Τ0Τ Τ0Τ
Silver Wishes Golden Dreams chapter 34 . 2/24/2013
Χιχι, επιτέλους! Ποπο... τελειωσε η ιστορία ε? Αργησα! Gomenaisaiiiiiiiii (_ _)
Aλλά! Εχω πολλά review να κανω ακόμα! .

Soooooo... Νομιζω το οτι θελω να τους τσαλαπατησω τους θειτσους το εχεις καταλάβει μεχρι τωρα xD
Αλλα και αυτος ο Danzo! Ακόμα και μεταθανατον πεταγεται απο πααντου σαν την ahem *cough coough* Anyway, να χαιρεται που ειναι εκει που είναι, γιατι αν τον επιανα στα χερακια μου...

Τ.Τ Για καποιο λογο συγκινηθικα πολύ με την Ayame... (μα γιατι αραγε?)

Και αυτός ο κοτκοτ! Ειναι παντου, εκτος απο εκει που τον θελεις...
Το καλο που του θελω να δειξει τη μουσουδίτσα του στο επόμενο, αλλιως θα το πω στον sensei!
Asuka chapter 39 . 2/24/2013
I'm checking your other stories they seem nice even thought I don't like sakura, you are improving so much I'll keep checking your work and I hope to see another fantastic story as I mentioned before (oops I'm the guest from the previous review I just forgot to write my name P ) I like OC stories so if you write another one of course I'm going to read it. So I guess this is the end I'll miss your story :/ I hope you keep doing well!


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