Reviews for Sticks, Stones and Broken Bones
Guest chapter 19 . 1/28/2013
aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! no it cant stop there ! please update soon, this is a great story and I love your work.
your fan
Aurora Crow
Ar-Zimraphel chapter 19 . 1/27/2013
I think this story has an interesting premise, and it is by-and-large well-written. A few problems:

1. First, Ron is able to identify Harry and then tells him how everyone searched for him, how the abuse came out and the whole Wizarding world lost their collective shit over it. Then, it becomes this great big secret again, and the four Heads of Houses are totally clueless? The scene with Snape especially-he had vowed to protect Harry, and he has Dumbledore's total trust, and you don't suppose that Dumbledore would have told him? Which is it-did the Wizarding world know he'd disappeared-and that everyone "assumed he was with his parents now"-or was it covered up by Dumbledore & the rest of the Order? Because if it was covered up, then it's ridiculous that Ron-who at the time would have been 10 years old-would somehow have been privy to this top-secret information, information to which Severus Snape, arguably the most important member of the Order aside from Dumbledore, would not have known?

Beyond that, the confrontation in Dumbledore's office with Snape again, felt contrived and OOC. Yes, Snape believes that Harry in PS is probably pampered and spoiled, but this isn't Harry from PS-this is a 12 year old kid who is in your words "emaciated" and noticeably unhealthy. He has obviously behavioral signs of past abuse, and Snape accuses him of being pampered? Don't you suppose that even Snape didn't know that Harry was lost, Dumbledore at least would have told them some of what Harry has gone through since? I realize you wanted a confrontation, and Snape is an easy scapegoat, but it felt forced and it didn't need to be.-it feels like you're sensationalizing the abuse so that every person he encounters is going to have that initial shock-and-awe moment.

2. Harry's behavior. I find the transition from a resourceful and resilient kid to this stuttering, cringing mess to be slightly exaggerated. Yes, he's had some tremendous shocks, including his inclusion in the Weasley family, but abused kids in these scenarios, particularly ones who've had to watch out for themselves, are typically full of bravado and confidence. I understand the direction you're taking, but I feel like it's a little too extreme in the other direction - maybe there is some happy medium to be had?

Anyway, please don't take my criticism the wrong way. I don't review a lot, but I'm reviewing now because I think that this story has a lot of potential and I wanted to address the continuity/characterization issues that I saw. You're by no means a bad writer-I did read through the whole thing, of course, and found myself engaged and looking for more-I just really think that you can make this story even better with some thoughtful consideration.

Looking to see what you do next! :)
hypercell chapter 19 . 1/27/2013
I absolutely love this story! It is the best Harry-lives-on-the-streets story I have read. I can't wait for more! I want to find out what happens, so don't make me wait to long! :)
senna93 chapter 19 . 1/27/2013
Great story! Very well written, some chapters gave me the chills - poor Harry. I love how you're taking your time with everything, not rushing anything. And I think the next chapter is going to be very interesting, Ron is going to learn a lot about Harry. Can't wait to read more!
Zireael07 chapter 19 . 1/27/2013
The story is amazing!
PhantomGirl12 chapter 19 . 1/25/2013
Great story! I like how Ron is getting to see how Harry lived.
gennastar chapter 19 . 1/25/2013
Oh, how I wish Ron were like Samwise Gamgee in the movies and in ff.
alc219 chapter 19 . 1/24/2013
I haven't been able to stop reading this since I found it! Its a great story. Its sos sad, but it's so nice to see Harry getting the help he needs!
I can't wait to read on!
ReaderOfNeatThings chapter 19 . 1/21/2013
I absolutely adore your story so far. Please update soon! -LAG;p
Lokismyking chapter 19 . 1/21/2013
Great chapter. I love how you make Ron and Harry's relationship so beautiful, so honest. And Remus! I love him! Thanks for bringing him into the story. Your fan, Futurehopes.
Guest chapter 19 . 1/20/2013
So happy Remus is back. He was always one of my favorite characters. I love the sentence structure of this chapter. It seems very deliberate and well thought out. The line 'but now?' after Harry says he didn't know what he was missing before was lovely. I found it very poignant and it made me stop in a good way. Critiques, I think you say 'the boy' too often, or other objective descriptions. I had a writing teacher in University tell me that you always have to watch the position of the narrator in respect to the subject. In Harry Potter, the narrator is exceptionally close to Harry himself with very little deviation. Although you give us a bit of perspective outside that, I think using phrases such as 'the boy' or 'his red haired friend' pulls the reader out of the moment. People don't think in that language anymore so to read it in this context is too formal for the material. It is okay to say 'he' multiple time because that's the language people think in and it doesn't bother people to read it.
Thanks for a great chapter, still love the LOTR narrative taking place and I can't wait to read more of your amazing story. I wait on bated breath.
DarkRavie chapter 19 . 1/20/2013
Another great chapter. Great story! I can't wait to read what happens next.
Sage of the Wood chapter 19 . 1/20/2013
THANK YOU FOR UPDATING! I've been DYING for you to continue one of your stories! I love them! You've been doing and excellent job, stop worrying, you are an AMAZING writer. I love how you include Lord of the Rings in there as well; it's one of my favorites. Keep writing, and update soon!
Tommy14 chapter 19 . 1/19/2013
I'm glad to see Remus here..I can understand his anger at not being told Harry was found. Now that Remus is involved I wonder how things will change if he figures out Wormtail is still alive. The Sam and Frodo scene was nice. Thanks for the update.
Bloody Phantom chapter 19 . 1/19/2013
it was not a disappointment! it was a good introduction! and i can't wait for the moment he realize pettigrew is still alive and was the one who kidnapped harry!
772 | « Prev Page 1 .. 19 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 39 .. Last Next »