|Reviews for Legend of Korra, the Azure Edition|
| Guest chapter 52 . 3/17
Alright, review time! Obviously I liked all the original content you added in, though the cannon stuff was done just as well; a modern version of the Dai Li (seriously why would they have been kept around after everything?), the new acolyte of Yao who's conspiring with them (and some of the things they mentioned in their conversation), and Asami's continued tutelage under Shaobing. I like the direction that's going, with him trying to steer Asami towards justice rather than vengeance. It reminds me of a scene in Young Justice, where Batman and Wonder Woman argue over his choice to make Dick Grayson Robin even though he was only nine when he started:
"Robin needed to bring the men who murdered his family to justice." "So that he could turn out like you?" "So that he wouldn't."
It makes a important point; Batman is so messed up because he never got justice for his parents' murder, but Robin did, and that's why he's not as somber as Batman. And now Shaobing has the chance to do the same with Asami, to help her have her justice so that she doesn't have to fall down the same path he did and lose what makes her wonderful.
And Tianshi speaks for us all in regards to her reactions to the Earth Queen. I can definitely imagine her getting frustrated enough to pull her sword on the Queen. Some good fight scenes this chapter, and some happy family meetings. I liked the scene with Asami meeting Jin the most, it was good to have something nice and uplifting after all the recent turmoil. I'd actually completely forgotten about Zuko's date with Jin ATLA, and I think your choice to combine Jin with Grandma Yin is a rather interesting idea. Maybe when they all meet up in the Oasis Zuko recognises her? And of course I loved all the little references you snuck in, especially the Star Wars one. You even added in some extra airbenders in addition to the ones that will soon be rescued.
I also liked your descriptions of the Lower Ring, and the corruption and brutality of the police. Again, this is where fanfiction has its advantages over the actual product it's based on; because you aren't limited by a budget or a rating system, you have more freedom to include details that make for a more realistic and exciting story. Some of the things in this chapter would certainly have not been allowed by Nickelodeon in the show proper, but you can get away with it.
Going back to the newest acolyte, Feng-Jiantou, judging by his bow and arrows I'm guessing he's based on Hawkeye just like how Yao is based on Deathstroke. Makes me wonder who Zhen and the as-yet-unseen acolyte are based on. So according to him, Yanwu is lying to the Red Lotus about what he plans to do once he's free. It should be interesting to see what effect that will have on the story, especially when we get to Korra's conversation with Zaheer.
Alright I think that's everything. Long review for a long chapter. Gook luck with the next one, and all the ones after for that matter. Your faithful follower thanks you for this update!
| Anonymous Rex chapter 52 . 3/17
Excellent work, as always. It might be a minor thing to mention, but I got a kick out of the "wretched hive of scum and villainy" line.
| LilLinkGirl chapter 3 . 3/13
Yes! Thank God! I hate the Mako/Korra pairing too! I know that I'm joining this party a little late but so far so good. I'm looking forward to seeing what you change and what is staying the same.
| Anonymous Rex chapter 51 . 3/6
Okay, another good chapter, as always. Looking forward to seeing where the rest of this Book 3 adaptation goes!
| dx-1118 chapter 51 . 3/6
Ooooohh, Asami on the path of vengeance! And under Shaobing's tutelage! This can only lead to awesomeness.
It has been a long time since you last updated this. But as you explained it wasn't your fault, you had work to focus on. Plus you were also working on your excellent Spider-Man trilogy. But now the story continues at last. We get Kai's introduction, Korra's continuing struggle with her grief, now complemented by Asami's, and the joining of forces as Team Avatar, General Iroh and friends (Kyoshi Commandos are coming back, yay!) go to ask the Earth Queen for aid. And while we don't see it here their enemies doubtless continue to grow in strength; Azula, the cult of Yanwu and of course the Red Lotus. And we get the reuniting of Bumi and Ursa, it was pretty funny seeing the ever-overconfident Bumi so flustered. Given how bad things are for our heroes it would be nice to see some more uplifting romance from the others; Jinora and Kai, a bit of Bolin and Tianshi before he meet Opal, and of course Mako and Asami. Who knows, maybe Iroh will even make a move on Korra.
Actually for such a long chapter not much actually happened to move things along, but really not much needed to, a lot of what occurred in this chapter is clearly meant to be a set-up for bigger things later on. And oh boy, I can't wait to see what some of those things are, especially once we get to Zaofu. I wonder if we'll see any of Kuvira?
Great to have this story back on track! Can't wait to see what other surprises you have in store (no spoilers)!
| Amonomous chapter 50 . 1/31
Please update soon! This is a fantastic read and great fan fiction
| dx-1118 chapter 8 . 1/20
Ok I didn't bring it up the first time round because I was so impressed with all the stuff you did with this chapter and all the cool ideas you introduced, but how was Korra suddenly able to bend in the Spirit World when she was brought to the future? I mean, she mentions to Aang that he couldn't bend when he entered the Spirit World, so how was she suddenly able to do it while still in spirit form? In fact, this happens again in Book 2, when Korra and Jinora go into the Spirit World Korra still has some of her bending even though she shouldn't. Bending requires a physical body (at least if you're a living person, I'll accept that the past Avatars are able to bend in the Spirit World because they are technically part of it) so a person who projects their spirit into the Spirit World cannot bend there. The only way to bend in the Spirit World is to physically enter through one of the portals. So you either need to correct this and have Korra unable to bend, or add in something that justifies how she is able to bend.
This is my only criticism. Everything else in this chapter is awesome. This is where your version of the story really started to take off and become its own unique thing.
| dx-1118 chapter 1 . 1/11
Hey man, so I'm rereading LOK The Azure Edition to see what changes have been made. Now I've looked at some of the other reviews you've gotten and I've seen that some people were indeed unfairly cruel in their insinuations that your story was not original enough. These are only the first few chapters, any story needs time to expand and bring in new elements. And as you get further in you introduce a lot of original content, so if they didn't have the patience to stick with this then that's they're own fault. Don't let them discourage you.
That being said, there's nothing wrong with you going back and editing the story if you personally feel that there are areas that could use improvement. Perhaps you noticed some little error and it just keeps nagging at you to fix it, or perhaps you come up with a new idea you want to include that you didn't think of when you first wrote the chapter, or your writing skill has improved and you want to go back to the earlier chapters and bring them up to par with the rest of the story. And it's always a good idea to go back and double or even triple-check your work to make it the best you can. In any case, I'm liking the changes so far, minor as they are at the moment, and look forward to seeing how else you improve your story as you go along.
| Pirate King Ray chapter 4 . 11/1/2014
Oh don't worry. Shaobing is one of the better OC's i've seen in fandom. Superior to a lot of shitty characters made up by less talented writers
| Pirate King Ray chapter 17 . 11/1/2014
Interesting take on this.
| Anonymous Rex chapter 50 . 10/22/2014
I have to say, while this was a really dark chapter, I got a chuckle out of certain things in it. Bolin and the Fire Lady's daughters were nice - and I both laugh and shudder to think about the idea of Azula having a cult in the time of Korra; that's such a take that at the apologists in the fandom that I applaud it.
On a more serious note, I also like that you're still referencing the idea of a Dark Avatar in this fic. Although it looks like Unalaq may still be the recipient of such power, I still have a suspicion that Azula might do something to turn things further to her benefit.
And finally, I have to say, I did not expect the death at the end of the chapter. Poor Asami, even after everything, Hiroshi was still her father.
And finally, let's see what Amon gets up to. I'm hoping the Equalists will give Azula and her cult a good, merry fight!
| dx-1118 chapter 50 . 10/22/2014
Wow, where do I start? First of all, I'm surprised you killed Hiroshi, considering you told me he was confirmed for a reappearance in Book 4. And what a death scene it was. Appreciate the heads-up you gave me, though this particular death was not as shocking to me as Tonraq's was. Poor Asami will need Mako more than ever now. I knew that guy Zhen was bad news! So is he one of the protegee's that Yao mentioned I wonder?
I am glad to hear the next chapter's going to be more fun and light-hearted, the story could definitely use a break from all the doom and gloom.
The Dark Avatar is confirmed! Awesome! So Yanwu plans to use Unalaq as his vessel huh? I'm still hoping Azula might try to take that power for herself, though how I do not know. One thing though, how did Azula get from the Fire Nation Capitol to the Tree of Time so fast? Or was she communicating with Yanwu in spirit? Because if she was you weren't very clear about it, it seemed like she'd somehow magically transported herself to the Spirit World. Come to think of it, how does Azula get from place to place so quickly?
Speaking of Azula, she's as evil as ever. Liked the flashback. It also makes sense that there would be a remnant of the old Fire Nation that would side with her. The empty Capitol was very eerie, not to mention a bit of deja vu: the last time the Capitol was found to be empty was during the invasion on the Day of Black Sun, and we all know how that ended. Actually that reminds me: during the invasion Ozai, Azula and the other nobles hid in an underground bunker, much the same as the royals and the people are doing now. That means it might not take Azula long at all to figure out where everyone's gone. And what about those who haven't hidden or sided with Azula, where are they? Were they banished, or being kept locked up in their own homes, or something worse? For once I'm not sure I want the answer.
Ursa and Tianshi seem pretty cool so far. So they'll be travelling with Team Avatar to the Earth Kingdom? That's interesting. I'm guessing you're having them go along because Shaobing has to stay in Republic City right now and you wanted someone to fill his place on Team Avatar. Are they going to end up being major characters? 'Cause if so I would like to see more of their individual personalities as the story progresses and see some differences between them besides their choice of weapon. Maybe have them be your own version of Mai and Ty Lee or something similar, where the two sisters are polar opposites to contrast with the identicalness of Eska and Desna. I do hope Bolin's interest in Tianshi doesn't come between him and Opal later, although that may indeed be your plan, after all Bolin is known for relationship drama. I'm also guessing that Team Avatar going to the Earth Kingdom for help is how we get to meet the airbenders, that works.
If I have one complaint, it's that you were a bit vague regarding Ursa and Tianshi's exact age. I mean, Ursa is apparently old enough to be eligible to marry Bumi, even though I'm pretty sure Bumi would be much older than her. Just want to make sure there's nothing weird going on there (although I'm certain that is not your intension).
Great fight scenes, thank you for taking my advice and pointing out the limitations of Yanwu's Avatars in this chapter. The battle at P'Li's prison was action packed (although you left out the Dragon), and it was great to see Lin back in action in Republic City.
Anyway, I think that's everything, hope you can update again soon
| Jokermask18 chapter 50 . 10/21/2014
I predict that Azula will become the Dark Avatar herself before this is over. Also, no offense but isn't Bumi a bit too old to be engaged to Zuko's grandaughter?
| Pirate King Ray chapter 50 . 10/21/2014
Eh. I liked it but you've already hammered in the "Azula evil" angle. There are scales of evil and while Azula was plenty evil she never struck me as "Complete Monster" (and no I'm not having a debate. I know she's evil. Complete monster is pushing it though going just by the show. Up till Ursa left (in Zuko Alone) she just seemed like an entitled in most ways.
| DAve and Bob chapter 49 . 10/9/2014
Action is always hard to put into words, too much detail makes it bogged down, not enough and it confuses the reader.
Also, I really don't mind either way, but you don't have to resort to giving foes or alleys the ability to bend more than one element. There are plenty of unique ways to use the elements if you think a little outside the box.