|Reviews for Grave of the Five Thousand|
| loverofallthings chapter 4 . 8/14/2013
I really really really wish that you would update. I positively love this story.
| Keyanna chapter 4 . 9/26/2012
You've got a great handle on writing compelling action here. I hope that you continue this!
| KJun chapter 4 . 9/13/2012
I love love love this fic!
| Mappadouji chapter 4 . 8/20/2012
Great chapter! Iroh and Bumi's interaction is great, specially because while they are part of a military force. Bumi still breaks away from the formal behavior and treats Iroh like the friend he has come to be since he was a kid. The walking dead were well done, I love the fact that they were incredibly dangerous but only have a limited time to attack.
| Duskdog chapter 4 . 8/19/2012
Still enjoying this story a lot. It's exciting and mysterious, with a very well thought-out plot (I'm a sucker for stories that actually take the canon history of a world into account in a meaningful way), and well-written dialogue. It's nice to see some of young Iroh's personality and motivations, and to see some of the less tangible effects of the war (lingering bitterness and guilt, etc.) on both sides. It's especially nice to see Bumi written as something other than a big loud idiot. Don't get me wrong, I love stories where he indulges the wilder side of his personality, but people are awfully quick to forget that he has years of responsiblity under his belt, and he must have command for a reason.
But c'mon, Iroh, be fair. Why should Bumi have expected the dead to rise this eclipse if they haven't been rising and eating ships full of people every eclipse for the last 65 years? (Or if they did, he didn't know about it obviously.) The poor guilt-filled major really does need a nice shore leave full of drunken carousing when this is all over, I think. He takes himself so seriously. :)
| MangoRamune chapter 2 . 8/18/2012
This chapter was very hard to stay focused on.
As with the last chapter, there were some instance of flowery language, but there were also a lot of unnecessary cues. Your dialogue often ends up chopped to bits by interjected pieces of action or emotion that aren't adding to the experience. For example:
"What a pity," Bumi wagged a finger on his free hand, still keeping the other around Iroh's shoulders, "… that in this cultured day and age we can not stop for a minute and enjoy tea, as friends, before going headlong into danger." Bumi fixed all his attention on the earthbender, allowing the young firebender to break free. "One might say it is downright uncivilized."
There are two breaks in Bumi's dialogue here. One to wag his finger, and remind us that he has an arm around Iroh, another to fixate on Shang and let go Iroh slip away. All four of these actions are occurring while the reader is supposed to also take in what Bumi is saying. It's...cluttered.
| Animefreak99-06 chapter 4 . 8/18/2012
Yeah, another awesome chapter to an awesome story. Reading this story gives me goosebumps (in a good way, I assure you). Iroh is so kickass. And the interaction between Iroh and Bumi makes me think about interactions between Sokka and Zuko (or possibly even Hakoda and Zuko if they ever had any interactions). You can totally tell they've been family friends for awhile. I love it. Please keep up the good work.
| whisper chapter 3 . 8/14/2012
I love this story. It is well written,suspenseful, and scary. I have read published stories and novels that lack the professional skills you have illustrated in this story. Please continue the story.
| MangoRamune chapter 1 . 8/2/2012
I'm not sure what to say.
I like the idea, and the mystery you've managed to weave. Your grammar is excellent, though your word choices can get a little flowery (onyx skies), but the problem is that I did not feel anything I should have while I was reading this. No apprehension or sense of isolation or hopelessness or...anything. It was lacking the build-up required. You take a very straightforward approach of just telling the reader what Yanel is feeling, but that destroys the potential suspense.
| EevyLynn chapter 3 . 7/31/2012
You can't just leave it there! Please continue soon! This is one of the best stories in the Avatar-verse I've ever read! It's definitely the most original. I am so looking forward to more.
I do have a question though, does Commander Bumi outrank Colonel Shang or is it the other way around?
| Animefreak99-06 chapter 3 . 7/31/2012
Scary, but so awesome. Thank you for such a wonderful update. Please keep up the good work.
| Anna Williams chapter 3 . 7/31/2012
What an amazing story you’ve got going here!
Your writing is very descriptive; I could very clearly picture a swarm of drowned firebender zombies rising up to wreak havoc and it gave me the creeps.
I also love the characterization of Bumi and Iroh thus far. It fits with what we know of them from the show and builds on it nicely.
I will be eagerly awaiting updates.
| Mappadouji chapter 3 . 7/31/2012
| Guest chapter 3 . 7/30/2012
Holy crap! What an awesome chapter!
| MegaBob452 chapter 3 . 7/30/2012
Well I'll be damned, a well written LOK fic that isn't about shipping. I was beginning to doubt if any existed, let alone centered around Iroh and Bumi. Can't wait to see benders fighting zombies in the next chapter.