Reviews for Criminal
HyperCLM chapter 23 . 7/3/2016
This fanfic... Felt like the aftermath of a tragedy that (in this fanfic) sadly focused too much on some characters while barely focusing on certain others.

I am so sorry, but My Fair Lady kinda overshadows literally everything this fanfic could do, which is why I will always love that fanfic more than this one... One thing it's prequel didn't overshadow itself on was for novelizing part of the game and tweaking it just a little. It was interesting to see the changes. But seriously, there were some adorable moments within the fanfic like Mimi saving Dimentio from the gang members and him saving her by the last gang member...

However, I had this feeling of just simply trudging through a bunch of words at one point or another because this fanfic wasn't always successful at keeping my attention.

For a first Mario fanfic, it was a great read. But as a fanfic that belongs in the same series as a certain other fanfic I have caught myself reminded of while reviewing other chapters, you were right to worry that this would underwhelm my experience. It really did. Like seriously, I didn't feel nearly as emotionally connected to these characters as the first installment did. I didn't have the same passionate drive to know what happens next as I did back in the first installment. I was simply...not as interested in this fanfic as I was for the first installment. However, to be perfectly fair, the prequel was a very Tough Act To Follow, considering what had to happen next chronologically, so I have to give you props for developing the main characters very well.

Which means I wasn't exactly able to NOT react pretty strongly to the Dimentio's General Malice to every opponent. He could be pretty frightening at times, which to be fair, most of that malice simple came from his unfortunate past...which occurred in My Fair Lady. THERE I GO AGAIN WITH THE FIRST INSTALLMENT!

All in all, I was originally going to simply wait like a few months before reading this...but I see that I have fallen too impatient for that. Due to the experiences here, I have decided, yet regrettably so, that I am not in the mood to read the sequel. The charm, which was one part extreme emotion (believe it or not), kinda lost itself on me. Again, I'm sorry for what I had to say...but it's the final chapter so I had to say these things now. Ciao.
HyperCLM chapter 22 . 7/2/2016
Wa-wait... One more chapter remains?! How could that be possible?! I-I thought... But Dimentio died, didn't he? The danger's over...isn't it? What's going on?!

[I had stopped feeling sympathy for Dimentio at some point in this chapter. That whole "you're still scared of me" line to Luigi triggered me too much. Also, changes from the original game, like the Count IMMEDIATELY giving the heroes the choice of killing him, didn't bother me. What did bother me was the rather swift finish to the Lord Blumiere X Lady Timpani romance... Ugh...]
HyperCLM chapter 21 . 7/2/2016
I'm starting to get the feeling that Timpani had every reason to not pick Dimentio at this rate. Also, Dimentio seems to have stop giving a fuck for hiding his plans to ANYBODY anymore. He also seems so far in his own delusions that he doesn't truly consider her feelings...which was the plan all along... :P

Hell, that line: "You will learn to love me again" demonstrates just how unreasonable he's becoming, all of which is just a futile attempt at keeping his love from abandoning him. You simply can't just re-love someone who has killed all your friends ... Which is made worse since Mimi is slowly experiencing what Dimentio's pain of loneliness and friends leaving you before your eyes ... Which Dimentio tried to make Lady Timpani feel by sending every hero to their implied deaths. Okay then, Dimentio.

2 more chapters left.
HyperCLM chapter 20 . 7/2/2016
Yeah, Nastasia... Even if you did decide to end the punishment for Mimi THEN, Mimi would have probably finished her punishment, making the whole punishment cancellation thing pointless. BOO!

Onto a serious note, I did kinda cringe at the Nastasia and Count Bleck moment for I knew that a similar relationship used to exist.

Also, the twist that Count Bleck just KNOWS that Dimentio is going to betray him and doesn't try to fight him right there and now is rather interesting...which makes one of the scenes form the original game up just a tad bit more sense. It's sad to hear Dimentio's desperate attempts at happiness, but what Lord Blumiere says is true.

3 more chapters to go. And I hope Tippi survives to the end.
HyperCLM chapter 19 . 7/2/2016
Four more chapters left...

This chapter really focuses on the extreme malice Dimentio has for her... Didn't he used to- you know what, screw it. It's simply startling how some people change. Btw, would there be any reason why Dimentio couldn't just plant a Floro Sprout on Tippi just to spite everyone or would he hate her too much to do so? :P
HyperCLM chapter 17 . 7/1/2016
The past really is the root of all evil... o.O [Which is why I keep mentioning it as much as I have been. Does that annoy anyone?]

It's quite sad how little faith Dimentio has in Mimi's love for him... Which is probably blamed on the past, oh look I did it again...which is probably why he feels that hate love.

After the old count said, "RIP Lady Timpani," I was just waiting for Dimentio to break down or at least react like it. Don't think that I forget random details throughout Dimentio's past, you hear me?! (The Taste-Changing Wine, The Piano Music That Went Soft-To-Loud for example)
HyperCLM chapter 16 . 7/1/2016
I am going to fully predict that this "date" won't work out so well...and if it does work out, then something else will disrupt the DimentioXMimi. Besides, he's had a practical breakdown after realizing he's grown jealous to Mr. L (and nearly threatening to kill him) and falling in love...which we all know how well THAT went last time. But I still want to call him a cry-baby for that...if it wasn't for his past...then I would... (angry face)

Also, when was the last time Dimentio talked about his own personal plans that had nothing to do with Mimi? (Or maybe I just forget too easily.)
HyperCLM chapter 15 . 7/1/2016
That's it. The only way this can even make sense to me is if I consider this fanfic to be fanon...for a few reasons.

#1.) While the fight scenes were different and a bit more realistic, I liked the change. Otherwise, I would just skim over the fight description...for I have played the game already.

#2.) Merlee never fails at rhyme. Except here apparently. I'm sorry for being particularly picky here but it just annoys my Merlee senses. :P

#3.) Tippi has the ability to deconstruct herself to blind her enemies?! I wonder how that would have worked out in the game... But cool!
HyperCLM chapter 14 . 7/1/2016
"Everything was going perfectly!"

Is that like the catchphrase for whenever someone has a plan? :P But in the meantime, someone appears to be jealous... XD
HyperCLM chapter 13 . 7/1/2016
I have a drinking game idea... Take a drink for every time Dimentio says Bellezza.

But that whole rubee signal kinda freaked me out. Just imagine a falling emerald fall near you...and then be told you have to get out before you get trapped there. Eek!
HyperCLM chapter 12 . 6/30/2016
My prediction: Wait... Dimentio randomly deciding to reward her with kisses (don't lie, you probably think so too)? Oh hell nah, brah.
HyperCLM chapter 9 . 6/30/2016
7 chapters later than I expected since my prediction back in chapter 2. Ah well. And Dimentio really should do something about his self-control. He just seems rather silly to Mimi especially towards the end. :)
HyperCLM chapter 8 . 6/30/2016
You cheeky sly dog, Dimentio you! :D

Unfortunately, I had deleted Google Translate on my iPad... Ah well. I find the chapter rather cute, for the most part. The playfulness both Dimentio and Mimi has... Triggering my O'ChunksXNastasia shipping senses... Ah, what fun! :D
HyperCLM chapter 7 . 6/30/2016
Whoever said that money was the root of all evil obviously hasn't taken a look at Dimentio's past yet. :P

Also, I hope Dimentio's mental health recovery doesn't take TOO long... similarly to mine after I encountered a story that was... [shudders]

And one more thing, I hope Timpani doesn't appear in this fanfic aside from flashbacks. She has suffered enough... _
HyperCLM chapter 6 . 6/30/2016
Hello there, My Fair Lady... We meet again.

(I worried that a certain memory would occur once you inserted the term "his body was on fire" into the story. And you wouldn't let me have the mercy of the girl being completely unidentifiable either.)

Onto something else, I can't help but know that Dimentio would obliterate the gang if necessary...especially when that 5th gang member threatened Mimi's life. I was thinking (especially when Dimentio triggered that glass box), "There is absolutely no way in hell Mimi's going to die." It was a nice break from the romance and the whole staying in Castle Bleck thing. I had fun trying to come up with my own counters against the gangs insults. :P

I think that's all I have to say as I'm still giggling at Mimi's reactions.
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