|Reviews for Cupid's Arrow, and cats|
| Qwerty chapter 2 . 6/30/2013
Where's the 3rd chapter?
| Lolwut8898 chapter 1 . 1/7/2013
A week my ass lol
| XxCRITICxX chapter 2 . 8/21/2012
Lol okay, update soon
| DeSpErAtE567 chapter 1 . 7/31/2012
For a starter, the writing style seemed okay for me. You might want to fix some of the few grammar errors, though. It was inconsistent when you started off with "Leo unlocked... ...opened the door... stepped inside...", all in past tense verbs, then suddenly switch to "...and closes...", which is a present tense verb.
The chapter seemed too short, though. It seemed more like an intro or a prologue. You could also arrange the format to make it easier to read, since a lot of people regress.
You probably could make it look neater by give line breaks when you're on the dialogue part. Let's say for example, at the part:
Leo finally realized what he was supposed to do today, today was his and Aeris's first date. Leo felt so stupid
"I-I'm so sorry Aeris, I-I forgot-..."
"You forgot! How can you forget a date! Are you really that much of an idiot!"
By line breaking the dialogue parts, it makes it easier to read and determine which person/character is speaking. You may italicize the dialogues, if you want.
I don't write my own fics or anything, so I'm just saying this from my perspective as a reader.
On another note, this story seems interesting and I'm looking forward for the next chapters. Keep it up!
| XxCRITICxX chapter 1 . 7/26/2012
Wish wish wish. Hold on leoxaeris date already? That's a little toooooo fast for their kind...
| TheDuckWaddle457 chapter 1 . 7/24/2012
Great Start i can tell from other stories i've read this one has potential
| yayleo chapter 1 . 7/24/2012
Hmmmm...This has potential. HOWEVER, I feel it should be longer, to flesh out all the emotions you may want to get out of anyone reading it. But with that said, this wasn't half bad.