|Reviews for The Sudden Death Experiment|
| Zilkenian chapter 15 . 9/28/2015
Okay, that other review was a little joke to say the story was good, with all my respects ;). But now, the serious review.
Remember, this is just my opinion, my thoughts. You can ignore them anytime you want, because not everything I'm going to say is good, but not everything is bad either. Just a mix.
This story had potential, and you started it very, very well. The pacing was slow enough to feel the characters desperation to try and get out of there, how they got close over the course of days and how they survived, and let you wondering if they were really outside or not. Then, you throw the first thing that took me offguard: Spy killed himself.
I mean, okay, he was desperate as well, and wasn't eager to cooprate, but he could as well just go and try to team up with them. And that was exactly hinted in Sniper's dream, in fact, that they got face to face and had to take a decision. But I could pass with Spy's death if he was that desperate.
Now, the Engineer. This is what worked the best in this story. He's a believable character, he's strong but needs to get out of there, he wants to find his family and reunite with them, and that is what makes the character realistic and human. Of course, once he knew Sniper destroyed the radio the moment his family answered, he went furious, totally normal. More than that, if he killed the Sniper in that moment, or injured him, and in the last moment he discovered the truth, would have been even more dramatic. But the way it was left was good.
Miss Pauling. I liked how she was trying to be strong, yet had her doubts. What to do? What's the best thing? Will everything be fine again? Those would be my thoughts in that situation. the blame she put herself was believable because she was part of what happened. BUT, the whole Spy thing threw me off like a km, because you nver really explained what the heck happened there. If you told that he was an hallucination, then it would be very smart, since a part of her mind is telling her what to do, but no, he gave her a gun, he was as real as her. Sorry, but that didn't fell right with me.
Caroline-GLaDOS. You totally got the essence of what I thought Caroline transforming into GLaDOS would be, but not the way Caroline would be. When I played Portal 2, Caroline sounded like a nice, enthusiastic and a bit naive person. Here, you describe her as the sister of the Administrator. But the moment she's half built, I actually was afraid of what she could do, and the cable thing was very smart. Still, she went against everything a bit top fast, going from smart to "nananana, I fooled you, hahaha".
And Sniper. I wanted to let this one the last because he's the biggest flaw this story has. At the beginning of the story he sit right with the whole thing, hunting for Engineer, taking care of him, that was a very good set and very in-character...until you threw in the love. A close friendship would have perfectly worked; he's being possesive of Engineer because he hasn't had another friend like him, and he wants to keep him, but no, he's in love, he jumps out of character like a rabbid trying to be a wolf.
The only things that saved him a bit are the moments of regret when he was going forward with Caroline's plan, and if he had go fully with that, and explain everything and tried to fix it, that would be Sniper and I would have accepted that he's homosexual. But no, he turned into a childish mess that couldn't get his head from between his legs. Even his stoic moment in Caroline's grasp didn't save.
He was too out of character, I'm afraid.
The ending, linking Miss Pauling with Chell was, actually, very clever, but i don't think it could fit in the cannon story. Miss Pauling and Chell have more or less the same age, and with that I mean around 23-25. If Pauling is 28 when she is put to sleep, she would be 30-something when she wakes up, and Chell is not that old.
And, the ending was rushed to no explained the situation, you let the characters and situation sink in, but then all of sudden you started running like there was a deadline to finish this.
Is a good story, don't get me wrong, I liked it and it's in my favs, and I hope I helped a bit with this. I'm not the best story-teller, but I'm a good story critic, so I hope you get this as what it is, just an opinion :).
| Zilkenian chapter 16 . 9/27/2015
"This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here:
"Huge success!" "
| Guest chapter 16 . 4/14/2014
My god, this story is perfect. The way you melded portal and team fortress together is utter perfection. Loved the story.
I'm surprised there aren't more reviews, really. This is one of the top five tf2 stories on this website, without a doubt.
| Guest chapter 16 . 4/11/2014
THAT. WAS. AMAZING.
| wellies chapter 5 . 1/18/2014
He shot the fucking moon.
| not a spy really chapter 10 . 12/15/2013
| not a spy really chapter 9 . 12/13/2013
omg the songs you choice are perfect
I'm really in love with this fanfic
| not a spy really chapter 7 . 12/13/2013
I wanted to write a fanfic with TF2 and Portal crossover AND THE ENGINEER AND THE SNIPER
AND YOU MADE IT REAL
I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU
| not a spy really chapter 6 . 12/13/2013
I knew about ENG Engineer and CP Control Point from the beginning, but I thought there wasn't any control point in the map they are :/
And the Moon, wtf? they're in a box?
btw I'm LOVING this fanfic SO MUCH
| not a spy really chapter 2 . 12/9/2013
| CactusNoir chapter 16 . 11/18/2013
Wow, that was cool.
Now I need to finish Portal 2.
| CactusNoir chapter 14 . 11/18/2013
Go Miss Pauling! Do something to make things better!
| CactusNoir chapter 12 . 11/18/2013
And Sniper! You shouldn't listen to crazy robots. Everyone needs to be nice!
| CactusNoir chapter 7 . 11/18/2013
Of all the things I was expecting, none of them were this.
| Royalraven007 chapter 16 . 9/3/2013
Wow! Thank you for finishing this! :D I wish the ending was a bit longer just to stretch out the explanation of what happened but I'm just so glad you finished it :) I have to say I'm kinda disappointed that something better didn't happen with Sniper and Engie but I guess they stayed true to their characters. Good job finishing! Thank you for your story! :)