|Reviews for Suzumiya Haruhi no Yami|
| Trscroggs chapter 9 . 4/5
An excellent end to an excellent story. Thank you very much for posting it.
| MissGardenia chapter 9 . 3/31
Yay, it's complete. Long time to be writing it, eh?
Most things seem neatly wrapped up, ignoring various satellite issues like Sasaki's group who I don't recall if they ever showed up.
Good luck Kyon, you're going to need it! (And maybe invest in some chapstick.)
| ninemil chapter 9 . 3/31
Succinct and polished, would be the first two words that come to mind. Also, cleverly compliant.
I can’t offer my customary commentary on the transition between chapters, (head full of noise at the moment, as you know,) but I can’t see why there’d be a problem here, given the proximity of release. Kyon did seem perhaps a little less talkative/expressive than usual, but given what he’s just gone through, that’s understandable and in character. (He certainly didn’t feel muted enough for the piece to come across as, say, rushing to wrap up, if my comment had conjured that concern.)
Love that we have Brothers amongst the accessible collective now. It’s sounds silly perhaps, given what a small thing it is, but in terms of representation and character range, I think it’ll be a great asset. In Kyon’s case, it also gives you an excuse to revisit first person, (as I hope you will.)
Curious as to how male Souma-bearers will cope with the sensations that it invokes during sharing. Also with how male/female and male/male sharing, and social stigma surrounding physical proximity and personal space, might clash. Would male characters exhibit the same touchy-feeliness that the female cast do? Would men be more voracious about the gratification and intrusion, as you might expect from male sexual psychology? Is there the potential for a plot bunny from that? Perhaps even a Claymore-style, Awakened-Being one? (Although that might perhaps require misconduct, or perceived misconduct, from one of two characters that seem unlikely to do so.) I’d love to see how Kyon’s already challenged view of sexuality might be stretched by male-male Souma experiences, and how he’d vocalize those feelings to the reader. Lots of potential for exploration, should you choose to play.
As noted elsewhere when chatting while writing this, I also wonder how Souma might affect guys, given the way it effects female physiology. I see massive potential for Eden of the East humour there, lol.
Love that the newcomer’s first introduction to Souma was via first person. That’s very cool, and perhaps much easier to approach as a reader, than via third, as you had to in Downs. Again, there’s scope there for playing, one would think.
I’ve already mentioned compliancy, but I think that needs stating mores strongly for good measure. Nothing’s actually changed, technically, so in that respect, the cross is entirely respectful of the Haruhi source. And yet, everything’s changed, hasn’t it, which both freshens the property, and opens doors up in Yamihime of the Strawberry Dead, and within the revised Haruhi here. Redistribution of Souma is a very tidy solution, and entirely plausible within the metaphysical rules that you’ve already laid down elsewhere. I’ve always complimented you on how carefully and effectively you’ve weaved these crosses, but in the case of Haruhi, you really have excelled yourself. Thoroughly enjoyable stuff.
I’m not going to get into Kaori’s presence too much, until I’ve finished Fire, as I don’t know if you’ve eluded to her move here, prior to it happening Haruhi-side. It is tidy, tho, and a fitting choice, for someone that’s also made/been part of something of a noteworthy mess, in Eve’s wake. It strikes me that, perhaps, this new group could be some of the Coven’s strongest allies, in a new time of need? Haruhi herself, in particular, were Kaori to train her?
Must say, the fluff was less jarring this time, after that kiss. The rivalry stuff prompted appropriately loud giggles, as did the devious looks. Tsuruya also felt much more natural, even tho nothing about her had changed. All down to her entry curve, as we discussed, I’d say. Her dialogue has a nice point of difference to it, which alongside the male cast, feels fresh and bouncy, so it’d be kinda nice to see her again, too. (Silly, pointy teeth and all. Remon and Kizuna would love those…)
So I’ll bite on the incubators – I’m guessing this has to be something new, since canonically, Haruhi occurred after ‘Of the Dead,’ didn’t it? Which I’m guessing also eludes to something not entirely being closed off/controlled during the ‘Of the Dead’ plot finale? Once again, eager to see how that cross pans out. Even more eager to see you pen Kohta, (after imo - noting my limited experience thereof - nailing Kyon and Koizumi,) and Saeko. Really, really interested to see how you handle Saeko.
So yeah. Before I drift too much into speculation, (which we can do in dialogue, rather than monologue,) a great overall series, and a stylish and polished conclusion. Happy to see the cast brought into the fold, and happy to see you’ve left yourself the potential to revisit first person again in the future, should you so choose.
Great to have you back, releasing. Looking forward to moar
| shanejayell chapter 9 . 3/30
Oh that was GOOD. Really good. I don't have much more coherent comments to offer, but it's a excellent wrap up, while also setting up more stories.
I assume what happened with Kaori's backstory will be covered over in Yamiberry. Unless it has already.
I also THINK I see what you meant when you complained about other plot bunnies. "Damned INcubators?" *lol*
| Trscroggs chapter 8 . 3/1
Such a tease, leaving us on a cliffhanger like this with an entire reality in the balance.
That being said, I love this chapter. It fits very well both into Haruhi's world and the mythos you have created and makes total sense in that context.
| WanderingBlackDragon chapter 8 . 2/15
Well, before anything, I think it's customary to once again welcome you back. If you're wondering who this is, it's World of Dragons Productions. Let's just say things had not been going well and I decided to ditch my old profile and start anew.
Anyway, my thoughts are a bit clouded as of writing this, since I had just finished a long, but strangely productive day at work. But, I'm not sure if I have much to comment on.
I don't know what it is with you and making me have some liking of characters I despise. I had grown to hate Haruhi so much that I stopped watching the anime and avoided anything with her face on it. But, it's nice to see Haruhi not being a self-serving c(bleep) and I hope this change will bring about something more likable in Haruhi.
It does make me wonder a bit about the two-halves, though, since I'd jumped into this story somewhere in the middle.
Let's see moving on, when I used to watch the Haruhi anime, I had been pulling to see Kyon and Mikuru get together, and it's strange that I seemed to be the among a select few, so getting to see her finally kiss Kyon had finally brought some closure there. And seeing the same from Nagato has also made me happy.
But, Tsuruya? I don't know if she's even interested in Kyon, or was just smooching him because the other two were doing it. Also, that bit with Koizumi made me squirm a little, and NOT in the good way. I always found him to be a kiss ass anyway '.
But, it makes me wonder what will happen from there; will Kyon get a harem of the series' favorite girls? How will Haruhi respond to this, since she apparently likes him too. I'm still kinda iffy about those two being in a relationship, but if Haruhi does indeed change for the better, then I can still get behind it.
Not much else to comment on from there, though some of your prose does feel kinda bloated? Though, right now my eyes are too tired to look for an example.
Anyway, good to see you back again and I'm waiting to see the conclusion of this piece.
| shanejayell chapter 8 . 2/14
Oh that was nice.
Good explaination for why Haruhi is supercharged with souma, as well as WHY the rules of the Haruhi-verse happened. The kissing scene was especially funny too. Looking forward to the next bit...
| Spikesagitta chapter 7 . 9/10/2014
Right. So Haruhi is another one of Eve's sister. To think, this is the story that got me reading up the other story in the proper order.
| World of Dragons Productions chapter 7 . 6/7/2014
"How does one mend a break with reality?" I have no friggin clue, at least one based on the rules of dimensional travel and such according to this canon universe. This chapter was a bit short, but then again I suppose there wasn't a whole lot to go from.
I didn't really care too much for Koizumi when I used to watch Haruhi. The guy always seemed like a kiss-ass and reminded me of those kinds fanatical fanboys who worshiped Haruhi like some sort of god (figuratively, but I fear that might be some people who did so literally)
Anyway moving on. The whole thing with the four factions popping out of nowhere seemed kind of comical, to say the least. Mikuru' older self also seemed kind of out of character to me, but then this is coming from a guy who only watched a few episodes before the heroine pissed him off. So, I suppose she could indeed be desperate to resort to seduction tactics.
However, the Ryofu's disarming move was a bit confusing to read, and I'd have to probably read it over again to make sense of it. But the real meat of this chapter has to be the sequence in the enclosed space. Never in a million years would I have guess that Suzumiya Haruhi is actually a middle school student who based all this madness off ideas for a story.
Let's see, putting some pieces together, I'm guessing that she witnessed Eve's passing in the form of a suicide, and decided not so much her world was boring, but instead didn't want to live in a world where her sister was gone for good. Now, possibly, the main step is getting her to come to grips with the reality of the situation. However, the problem is doing so that isn't just going to make things worse.
Another thing I'm wondering if that since the real Haruhi based the show's reality on her story, how did Hazuki and everyone else fit in? I might have to go back and read the previous chapters, but I'm wondering if their appearance was somehow predicted by her or something.
Lastly, Haruhi's... I'll say favoritism towards Koizumi in the initial episodes I watched makes a lot of sense thanks to this chapter. I get the feeling Koizumi won't even entertain the idea of being in a relationship with her out of fear of what might happen, especially considering what we're dealing with, but it does make me wonder if there's hope that he and Haruhi can be an item of some sort.
I suppose we shall see. . I'm also trying to get back to work on my Eds story.
Anyway, here's to hoping I hear back from you, haven't seen you in a while since the last Strange Fire chapter.
| shanejayell chapter 7 . 6/7/2014
Oooh. Okay, this is getting good. LOVE the bit with Kyon describing the confrontation "all guns, knives, threats and cleavage."
| MissGardenia chapter 7 . 6/6/2014
Deeper and deeper in the rabbit hole we go.
I'm surprised Koizumi's taking it so well. Reinforcement of his bro status!
| xXimmortalXx chapter 6 . 5/8/2014
Please update this story is amazing!
| Emperor Of Lemurs chapter 6 . 3/29/2014
I rather liked this one. Kyon's questions at the start of the chapter ran somewhat parallel to my own. Well, except for the "gay as the day is long" one.
Human!Nagato was somewhat disconcerting at first (though telling the entity to fuck itself was awesome), as its pretty hard to imagine her as anything other than the not-actually-emotionless girl from canon. It was part of her charm, really. And I may be reading it wrong, but it almost seemed as if Kyon was AFRAID that she would turn into her Disappearance Moe-self. Glad she didn't!
Still though, I have to admit that I totally shipped Nagato and Kyon when I was reading the novels. Your romance scene practically made me squee.
Apparently one doesn't have to be female to fangirl at things.
Its also heartwarming to see Kyon and Hazuki bonding. There as definitely a disjoint between them at the start which is no longer there. Much like this fic itself; the sheer dissonance between the narratives made it somewhat awkward at the start, but you seem to be improving on the style more and more with each chapter. Keep it up!
Can't wait for the Kyon and Koizumi chapter. The one thing that always disappointed me in canon was that Kyon and Koizumi never really bonded. I mean, I get that it reflects the (somewhat unfortunate) real life tendency of guys to maintain emotional distance from each other, but still. Yaoi or no, I always got the sense of at least an unrequited (to use Hazuki's terms) raging bro-crush. Good to see them getting along better! And funny that Kyon measures Koizumi's emotional health by how annoying he is.
And, as petty as this may seem, it was good to finally see someone get a partial one-up on the supernatural lesbian astral sex connection. Kyon and Nagato have a deep connection even without it! Seriously though, I get that the "most magical purest form of love happens between two girls" trope is a staple in the Yuri genre, but... I'm a guy, and sometimes it makes me feel down on myself, damnit!
On the other hand, Nagato having pseudo-symbolic astral yuri sex with the Yamiberry cast does make for nice fanservice! All that from a touch!
And since it all happens from holding hands, and Koizumi also held hands with them... Koizumi had magical lesbian sex with the Yamiberry cast.
See Kyon, you don't have to be a lesbian for the Souma-magic to happen! Ambiguously gay works too!
| Emperor Of Lemurs chapter 5 . 3/28/2014
Oh yes, I was very much waiting for that encounter. And you did not disappoint!
I kind of imagined this encounter as them shouting at one another, but this was far more in character. Lilith being a shameless flirt and scary as hell at the same time, Kyon's being resolute and determined to protect his friends despite having absolutely nothing to go on...
Let's face it, Kyon is so beloved because his awesome moments are something you could imagine a real person doing. Awkward, hiding behind snark, mildly terrified...and pulling inner strength from he knows not where.
Goosebumps at the whole "Everything will be safe and normal and you'll get to be with all your friends... but they won't be quite the same, and "your" Haruhi won't really exist anymore." As soon as she said that, him going into defiant determinator mode was guaranteed. It is the one thing he fears most.
Lilith got her blows in too. Kyon may be a meta deadpan snarker extraordinaire, but seriously, he has no chance of out-metaing a goddess who's domain of creation is based around STORIES.
I chuckled at her straddling him at the end. Considering that, and her past interactions with Hazuki and Kaname, the girl really seems to be attracted to people who defy her! Also, her introducing herself to Kyon by appearing naked in his bed? Classic!
| Emperor Of Lemurs chapter 4 . 3/28/2014
That sucks. The surprise at seeing this fic continued is a bit less pleasant now that I know its inspiration. Rest in peace Brian.
Well, now we know why Kyon is so normal. He's normal because he's literally the only real person in existence, other than Haruhi. Wonder how his ability to influence supernatural beings will get them out of this mess...at least he has the Yamiberry brigade to help him!
Good twist though, I actually didn't see that one coming!
Despite the inherent serious drama in this chapter, I quite liked the subtle humor:
Nagato goes to the Great Library, which is somewhat akin to actual Heaven. The Great Library is filled with near infinite books/data, which is heaven to a Data-Entity. The Great Library is a library, filled with millions/billions of books, which is heaven to Nagato. Nagato is in Super Heaven!
Kyon actually realizes he said his inner thoughts out loud! Damn you, Inner Voice! He touches on the fact that all Souma bearers tend to be lesbians! Seriously, Rushuna is a token.
Naru and Keitaro have Souma! I've actually been suspecting that since Mutsumi was mentioned; it explains Naru's super strength and Keitaros immortality. Fridge Brilliance!