Reviews for Fealty's Sake
Shasaria chapter 12 . 4/27/2015
Hello! I did my review in DA...But it belongs here as well.
Ok... So. Where to begin? Sorry this going to be long... But it's my review and I wish you to know how this made me feel.
I am truthfully so enthralled and submerged in this story that you are literally making me ooze with compliments. How should I say this?
This is brilliant! I feel it's claws clutching to my heart and sinking me into a mixture of pain and pleasure... I took my time reading, and I found myself re-reading parts, questioning myself on what would happen. Eating and breathing the characters backgrounds like a sweet torture. I know...I'm not usually a poet...lol! But I do write and I critique freely without apprehension of consequence, always with good intentions. I know when something has taken time and thought. This piece of work shows your dedication and it is a perfect reflection of the importance you've given to the world, the characters, the stories behind their port-raid faces. I was dazzled, shocked and infuriated! The pace was very well handled. The interactions between characters was sublime. The dialogues and reactions, could use a little work though, cause sometimes you switch fast and confuse the reader. But other than that... Fellow writer, I must say, I have nothing to instruct or point out. And believe me, that happens only once in a while. This story in your head, deserves to be continued. Taking your time and being true to it. Your writing flows so at ease...I love your style! Easy to read but deep and strong. Loved every minute I spent reading it! I am slashed by the cliffhanger... but it was perfect. You need to keep writing this fic, it's truly very good work!
Aside from that, of course, as a reader I wish to know the development of future events. Titus is so...breathtaking, measured and profound. He gives me goosebumps! Turians... Yummy! Lei, on the other hand is this wonderful key character that makes things so interesting. She's like a puppeteer pulling the strings from behind the curtains, and she is also sweet and quirky. Love her personality! And boy... Does Titus and Tori need her strings now...
Tori, so complex, innocent, sensual, honorable, blind, reckless, spirited, cold and soooo passionate! I am emphasizing on blind though... I feel like screaming " You know deep down you wanted every minute of that sinful event, yet you deny it... Silly human. Open your eyes! You adore that turian hunk!". But I like that weak side of her... I like that frailty under the cold shield.
Oh well...Guess I'll have to wait. And sorry I blabbered so much... But I thought you deserved this knowledge! And although I don't know how this is going to continue, I await the next update thrilled and clapping my hands like a fan-girl... As much I hope this to evolve well (because I'm more of a Jane Austin kinda girl) I accept to sit patiently.
Thank you again for such a great read!
Elemental Queen chapter 12 . 10/22/2014
Great story!
cartec677 chapter 12 . 1/28/2014
Wow that mad me sad, I know they have feelings towards each other but they both are to stubborn to admit it. I hope they don't ruin the little trust they have for each other now. Please update again soon, this is getting way to serious to end now.
DearChibico chapter 12 . 11/2/2013
D: Noooo, this can't be!
Mothbanquet chapter 12 . 10/28/2013
The story continues, with the plot getting more sophisticated - turning from a series of one-off, 'themed' episodes to a continuous narrative with logical and effective cliffhangers. This is a clear showcase of your improvement as a writer and speaks of great things for the future.

Your portrayal of Titus in particular here was patient and convincing, from his interaction with the asari to the heavy-hearted admission to the executor. Pallin's revelation of course is a real treat for anyone who's keeping up to date with your other fic, Of Blood and Honour and really shows how deep and thorough your characterisations are.

Again, another stellar piece of work.
Charis77 chapter 12 . 10/26/2013
Absolutely excellent and riveting chapter! So well written and described. I loved the introspection in this chapter on both sides. I can't wait for more!
KaeliRed chapter 11 . 10/22/2013
Awesome story, hope there's more to come.
Mothbanquet chapter 11 . 10/2/2013
You continue to impress! It's not often I see a slow-paced character story (or chapter, at least) that doesn't require a few skipped paragraphs but you pull it off with style. I think the best aspect though is the fact that you have a love scene (which is wonderfully sensual and yet tasteful) that does not suddenly change the people in it. Titus' reaction to the event is telling and yet intriguing at the same time - you're really keeping your readers on their toes, wondering what will come next!
Charis77 chapter 11 . 10/1/2013
Great, intense chapter. Titus' conflict is well written and I like it went that direction. I wish more writers took into consideration how difficult cross-species relationships would really be.
Mothbanquet chapter 10 . 10/1/2013
Captivating, both in the relentless mental anxiety Titus displays throughout and the logical series of events leading up to the conclusion. I've always said your attention to detail is strong and this chapter is no exception. Titus' meditation is one of the most convincing, not to mention fascinating, scenes I've read for quite some times and definitely something I can see fitting into turian lore.

Congrats on another fine chapter!
Guest chapter 10 . 9/30/2013
been awhile ,but the quality of the story is still and I hope that you will update more frequently because this story has really good potential
Charis77 chapter 10 . 9/28/2013
LOVE! This chapter is amazing. The turian and personal info is riveting and wonderfully canon. Titus is one of the best OCs I have ever read.
hannah.cutts.16 chapter 9 . 3/7/2013
Am loving the use of original characters for the main story with the original mass effect lot taking a back seat
Mothbanquet chapter 9 . 12/19/2012
Really nice flow in this chapter, from the frenetic and humour-laden action sequence at the beginning, all the way to the explosive entrance of Tori's mother at the end. Good characterisation throughout and inventive dialogue are the definite highlights here.

This story's starting to get a unique, exciting 'action movie' feel to it, and I mean that in the best possible way.
Mothbanquet chapter 8 . 12/18/2012
A very interesting chapter, very interesting indeed. The backgrounds for both Shaw and Cato are in-depth and believable within the canon. Lots of really nice moments, from Titus 'rescue' on the balcony to Tori's little slip of the tongue at the end there. Very nice.
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