|Reviews for Beneath The Sky|
| Myra the Dovahkiin chapter 21 . 1/27
great story. keep writing. update soon. I can't wait to read more! This is getting interesting.
I'm actually a fan of Odahviing and the Dragonborn. Mostly because Odahviing is my favorite dragon.
| Myra the Dovahkiin chapter 1 . 1/27
You said you ship the Dragonborn with everything that has a name and is mildly important, does that mean you also ship the Dragonborn with Alduin?
| Julie5 chapter 1 . 11/3/2014
Your authors note made this chapter worth reading particularly "I've come to the conclusion that I ship the dragonborn.. with everything that Breathes" LMAO
| Guest chapter 21 . 10/27/2014
Please please update soon.
| qweenashleyfox chapter 21 . 6/2/2014
i am loving the story so fare
| paladinofthelantern chapter 21 . 4/23/2014
Hello there! I like your story, and it has a lot of potential. However, I would like to offer some constructive criticism, if I may. Some of your sentances seem to be a little choppy, so I would suggest trying to make them flow better. I'll give an example.
Collin walked and sat by the river. He took out an apple. It tasted sweet.
Collin strode along the mossy banks of the river before seating himself on the soft grass. He reached into his pack and withdrew an apple from it before taking a bite. The taste was sweet and succulent to his tongue, like springtime itself had been infused into every inch of the fruit.
You might also want to flesh out the characters a bit more. What are their feelings? What are their relationships with others? What makes them happy or sad? How would they deal with a certain situations? Do any of their emotions conflict?
Another thing to remember is realism. Even though the Elder Scrolls is a fictinal universe, making it a little bit realistc can help connect readers better and draw them in deeper. I noticed that three characters were fighting a hundred bandits. It would be a little more believable to lower that number to ten bandits instead, for instance.
And it's perfectly okay to have short chapters. When I write, I stress content over length. Just because a book is five hundred pages doesn't mean it's the best thing ever written. Above all, write because you love it and because it makes you happy.
I in no way mean to upset you. I'm just trying to give my opinion. It's your story so do whatever you want. Good luck! :)
| Evil Is Relative chapter 21 . 2/25/2014
I really like this story; I've read all 21 available chapters in a day. Odahviing is my favorite here, and I think that he is still quite in character with the dragon we know and love from the game. He seems just the right amount of bewildered for a creature for which this setback is only the blink of an eye. I am surprised he doesn't miss flying, though.
Emlen is a wonderful bundle of contrasts, but she seems to be digging a hole for herself that she may not be able to get out of. I get the impression that Odahviing is the only thing holding her together, anymore, and that many of her past decisions rub raw on what is actually a very sensitive and kind soul.
Also, the scene with Aventus made me laugh Jell-O out my nose. Thought I'd share that.
Evil is Relative
| Jim chapter 21 . 2/3/2014
This is great keep it up!
| Guest chapter 21 . 1/3/2014
Wow this story is good. Was most definitely worth it to stay up all night reading the whole thing. Would do so again.
| Guest chapter 18 . 1/3/2014
Haha, writer's block you say? A poor chapter? That was brilliant. How I envy you. Even with writer's block you impress. This story is one of my favorites. I really like the idea. I also really like how you've fleshed the characters out. Emlen is one of my favorite dragonborns ever, and wow, this Emlen and odaviing stuff is great. Who would've thought that would make such a good story. I think what's most impressive though is how you seem to constantly fill every chapter with some intriguing event. Constantly! It's ridiculous! How do you do it? How do you work it in to the storyline, make it mesh perfectly? Just when I think you've explored every possible interesting option, you come out with a whole new even more intriguing development. And then it doesn't even turn out to be a major one! Anyway, your writing is really impressive. I'm gonna keep reading more. Probably all of your stuff actually. It's good. Thanks for that very much!
| Marcurio'sPrincessXxo chapter 21 . 12/31/2013
Short, but I'm not complaining! I can't believe I missed the day this was uploaded! So good to see you're back at writing!
*Side note- I listened to Black Cauldron by audiomachine while reading and it went perfectly with the fighting scene... must say! (:
| LaniusLegioXIII chapter 21 . 12/27/2013
Nice update! Welcome back.
| Becka3490 chapter 21 . 12/25/2013
| Xiscorr chapter 21 . 12/24/2013
Oh dear. I totally forgot what was going on...
I GET TO READ IT ALL AGAIN YAY!
I'll be back once I'm caught up!
| Skyrim's Blue chapter 21 . 12/24/2013
Oh my Lordy! I leave to do things and I come back to this! This had to of made my day. Welcome back