|Reviews for The One: A Fairy Game|
| jAI chapter 23 . 5/15/2014
Update please. I'm soo sad over Ever and Freed's deaths. I'm glad Elfman is alive though :)
I wonder what Team Fairy Tail would do to those who captured them.
| TheDorkyCelestialFlame chapter 23 . 4/11/2014
update :3 I want some action! Although this story was really cool and full of action. One thing that can be considered as a weak point in this story would be the lack of thrill and the loose rules around which guarantees a not-so-scary atmosphere in the story. Like when they are eliminated- I thought that nobody gets out but the only remaining winner? It's just that a little pointless since you can eliminate yourself by destroying the bracelet without suffering consequences. I thought they would die when they're eliminated. Many loopholes around.
And how come does the 'Goal' seems closer to where the remaining group 2 of Fairy Tail members are staying at? How come did Butterfly and Jinx survived? So they are not participating in the game anymore? Just like that? If that so, then it's a little pointless, how come you set a rules of a game when you can get away with instead being killed?
And also, I can totally understand if Butterfly and Jinx would survived but having them in a room with Lucy and the others? Like I said earlier, it's a little loose and lax. To create a thrilling, sick and twisted game, no survivor should be mixed with Lucy and the others. If that so, then we quite knew that it's inevitable for the survivors to tell them even if it's just a clue. Then they would already expect the procedures or the protocols.
Wish you luck! I'm sorry if somehow this offended you. But I really like the story and I'm suggesting something which can improve your story not that it needs a big improvement.
It's cool. :D
| Fussy Lunch chapter 1 . 1/31/2014
Get this off. You're supposed to put challenges on your profile, not post them as stories. There's so many people that fill the archives with shit like this.
| YandereNekoSenpai chapter 21 . 11/11/2013
S-so... Jellal's blast... Killed Evergreen? Jellal... *starts crying again* it's not his fault it's not his fault it's not his fault...
| Annie chapter 21 . 10/10/2013
Ah, you guys did that too? I was considered one of the 'smart' people so I always felt really famous when I had six people trying to look at my answers at once xP Ah, I guess that's true. Still, I always feel bad whenever I try 'borrowing' other characters, which is why writing fanfiction scares me... I think I understand what you mean. At least in fanfiction it's easy since many characters have their own wikia, and if you're for example writing about someone getting cancer you can study common reactions to get cancer ect?
Ugh, that sounds incredibly complicated and difficult. Well, it's always nice knowing languages, but you won't be able to talk to anybody using them! Unless you find someone speaking the same language as you, but I'm not sure those languages translates into things like 'how are you'... Oooh, that seems really cool! Then maybe you could help with programming of one of the Japanese games that they release when they're translating to English? Or is computer-language international? If it is, you can start playing them/making them before it's even finished!
I had a black one :) I'm not sure where it is now though... it was one of those 'flip' ones (that's not what they're called, but I know that it was not gameboy color or the one after that but the one after that again. 3rd generation kind of. I thought it was awesome since you could 'fold' it into one piece when you weren't using it ) Don't worry about it, I've watched that clip too and I thought it was funny xP Aw, that's too bad. I guess it takes some time translating it though, but if it's an online game you can usually find some badly translated ones on the net... (only works for computer games though). It's fine, it's healthy to be able to make fun of your country every once in a while :)
Ahahaha, I figured you - a person who loves creating things AND killing people (no offense by the way, I'm simply basing this on what you've told me in your author's notes) would like the Sims xP I read about that! I think you can kill a lot of people with a zombie apocalypse there :) It's fine, in the beginning of the series I even struggled with remembering who Gray was -.-
Oooh, that's good! (I want you to finish the work, but I'd feel bad if I'd had to say 'then hurry up and loose everyone you care about' D:). I've never watched Naruto (I started reading it, but it's really long and once I get really into a manga I will start thinking about that instead of school so I try to avoid it for now) so I wouldn't know. Still, I think that anyone who's nearly killed should be allowed to bleed a bit. I love their words too! They have so many good quotes that I'd like to use in real life sometime... like Gildart's 'fear is not evil' speech!
Ah, sorry about that! Nooo, we already have Mashima trolling us! Why are all manga-authors obsessed about trolling their audience? xP (And yes, 'two' manga-authors qualify as all manga-authors in my head. Don't judge).
Well, that's usually a good indicator I guess.
I finally read it and I didn't get it till I read the author's note explaining it -.- I'm really slow today -.-
I really like this chapter though! Cana's reaction seems pretty realistic, and that whole holding onto Evergreen's arm thing really scares me! (Which is a good sign for this story).
Just a question though, if this isn't a spoiler: I know you've said that the people that won't make it gets 'eliminated', but is this simply a status (like some of the people who've made it and haven't died) or do they actually die? (Of course, since this is also a suspense-story you might not feel like you can answer this question yet which I understand completely :) )
| Moggadeet chapter 20 . 10/2/2013
Kyaa! You're finally back. I was unable to use the internet for a while and finally when i could use it again, i checked all the stories and when i found out you've updated...SQUEE! DO UPDATE SOONAND ADD MORE LUCYY! YOU ROCK!
| JJun chapter 20 . 9/18/2013
A really good chapter. They are a many options: One is that Fade's "Death" was added to Jellal's bracelet, another is that Fade's Kills were added to Jellal and the last is that someone outside of all that wants that Jellal advance to the next phase. It's great about seeing Fade alive :). About my disease, I don't have any problem to talk about it, that means that i'm healed of it :D
| Annie chapter 20 . 9/17/2013
Well, technically I learned hiragana and katakana (I keep writing katana... I'd be rather impressed by myself if I learned how to write something with a 10 kg heavy sword...). I tried learning kanji, but the most advanced I actually remembered was tsuki (moon?), so I guess that doesn't really count xP
Oooh, that's a good treaty! I had a friend who also took Japanese, but he was way better than everyone so I couldn't make anything like that... it'd be more like "hey, if you read this, then you can define everything and correct all the spelling mistakes! And I can sit here doing nothing! Isn't that a GREAT idea?!"
Yeah, seeing as you have maybe 50 OCs (I'm not counting so I might be terribly wrong) I guess that's true xP It seems a bit scary though, since if you get it 'wrong' people might be angry at you or something... meh, I guess everyone'll just be happy that you remembered about their OCs in the first place (I have a tendency to be terrible with these kinds of things. I tend to write the complete opposite of what I intend to write. For example, a children's story can easily become an angsty horror story...). Wow, that sounds really cool! I guess I can't make you become an English major just because I want you to become an author xP Well, maybe you could use that to write some really cool science fiction story! Or you could make your own computer game with a good plot to it! (I might've misunderstood what computer scientists do, I know very little about university courses in general. My logic is more or less that computer scienceyou can do anything that's computer-related)...
Um, I'm not really sure. I can't tell the difference... I've only had a gameboy once, so you might be right about the PSP . Yeah, I wouldn't be able to play a horror game on a touch screen. I'd probably end up punching the screen instead... I'm not sure. I think it's a DS? Though it might be a PSP. I'll see if I can find more news about it.
Ah, you sound like someone who could've liked playing sims xP Yeah, I guess that's true. But his magic is more memory-based, isn't it? So he just manipulates what already exists, and doesn't bring things into existence. I'd like Rustyrose (from Tenrou Island's) imagination magic better.
Wow, that sounds really complicated. It sounds awesome though! I love how you specificy that you are 97.4% done. Not 97%, but 97.4% xP
Please do! I really want to read it! ...damn it, I'm looking forward to reading a manga that doesn't even exist yet. This is definitely not helping on my short patience...
Yeah, I also like mangas better! It seems a bit more realistic, I guess. Have you for example noticed that in the anime the guild members never bleed? (Well, sometimes they do, but rarely ever). Still, I guess that the anime music is a big plus, so there's advantages to both of them.
Yeah, I got really shocked by that part! I mean, I know Mashima is famous for his fanservice and everything, but fanservice of a deceased person? Isn't that boardering on necrophilia (I think that's the word for when you are into dead people)?
Ah, that's true :) I tend to read everything, because sometimes the author says something about 'the next chapter will be out...' or 'in the next chapter you will...' so I tend to look for all sorts of clues like that xP
Yay, you didn't kill Fade! I kind of figured you wouldn't, since most of your readers seemed to just 'crawl into corners of depression' when it seemed like you did xP
Ugh, I have no idea about the Jellal one, but I want to guess anyways! Maybe he was the one who broke Fade's bracelet, and the technology behind it therefore thought that Fade was dead, therefore making them think Jellal had killed him?
| Guest chapter 20 . 9/17/2013
o o Fade . . . *stares suspiciously*
| Haley Le chapter 20 . 9/16/2013
Oh my world... I have no words to describe this story, so scary and gore yet so brilliantly written and organized! :) I don't know if it is too late to submit my OC though... :/ But oh well, YOLO! xDDDD Can't wait for your next chapters! :D
Name: Hikari Dollie
Appearance: She has wavy magenta pink hair that reaches her midback, and her bang push back with a pink and black headphones revealing her left blue eye and right crimson red eye. She is rather petite girl with the height of 5'3", with a very define figure: small waist, large bursts and large bottoms.
Personality: She is a pacifist who is against killing. She is also an outspoken girl who is not afraid to speak her mind, and a loyal girl who doesn't trust strangers easily (except her Exceed). She can be sarcastic to strangers, but once she knew they are trustworthy she will be a sweet-heart.
Magic: Earth Dragon Slayer, and Sound Manipulator (If a mage happened to hear the first 3 notes she sang, they will be paralyze, and be caught in her illusions)
Clothes: She is also wearing a black tube top that was covered by a white crop jacket, and she was wearing a dark pink skirt that stops 2 inches above her thighs. Hikari is also wearing brown and pink cowgirl boots that reached 2 inches below her knees. She is also seen carrying a giant tripple blade scythe behind her back.
Past: The Earth Dragon found her at the outskirt of a forest near a small town, and adopted her in as a child. She was taught the dragon slayer techniques, and how to live like a normal child. When she was 8, she found an Exceed egg, and that was when Flora her Exceed was born. She continue to live with her dragon mother until her dragon left 2 years later. Nowhere to go, she decided to wander into the town, and caught the eye of a street performer. He adopted her immediately, and she began to learn Sound Manipulator from him, as well as read lots of books to improve herself. She learns to sing and play violin later, and along with her adopted dad perform around Fiore and walk places to places. When she turned 15, her foster father passed away from cancer, and she continue her life as a street performer/independent mage.
Family: None. (Well, her dragon mother is gone, and her foster dad passed away.)
Secret: Her only goals are to find her dragon mother, and to live her life to the fullest. Her red eye sealed a lacrima that her dragon mother put into her a day before she left, saying that HIkari will one day needs it. It is actually harboring a small fraction of Acnologia power.
| Annie chapter 19 . 9/15/2013
Ah, then I have to see if I can find them there. I actually made some mochis this summer, but I only got to hammer the rice while the Japanese lady who taught me it did the rest, so I still don't have a clue what made it so good...
Well, at least you got to take Japanese! I had to quit this year and I only completed my first year :(
Ahaha, I guess that's true. It's easier using the main characters because you feel like you get to know them through the manga and anime though, isn't it?
You're really good! I'm not sure what you're majoring in, but if it's English or something like that I'm sure that you can use that to become a great author in the future!
No, I've never played any of them! I don't have a DS so... but I've seen others play it! There's a new one out now called 'Book of Shadows' as well, and I think they're making/translating the latest game now! I really wish I could play it...
Mm, but I still feel like I should have something to write before creating an account. That might just be me though.
Wow, those mangas sounds really interesting! Are you planning on getting them published soon? I want to read them!
Yay! This is really interesting, so I really hope you will!
I know, I got really mad too! I figured he wouldn't really die though, since he never actually kills fairy tail characters, but then he decided to (SPOILER ALERT IF YOU HAVEN'T FINISHED THE WHOLE GRAND MAGIC GAMES ARC) kill of Ultear instead? But she was the longest-running villain! And when she finally turned good she had to die! It was so sad!
Good, then I don't have to feel like I'm annoying people! I'm forcing you to make really long author notes though... hopefully people won't mind that :P
...please tell me you didn't kill Fate. He's still alive, right? Please let him be alive. And please let Jellal be alive as well.
| YandereNekoSenpai chapter 19 . 9/10/2013
I-I-I... *gets up and walks off crying*
| ChocoChipzCookie chapter 19 . 9/9/2013
FAAAADDDEEEEE. NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU. Well, I got another idea that I haven't seen yet XD So . . . BUT FADEEE NUUU o o
-Name: Roxanne Haley
-Personality: Calm, Cheerful, Cunning, Protective, Stubborn, Sarcastic
-Magic: Fear [Can conjure illusions of anything related to fear, can also put on and take a way phobias on people. Can also make solid objects related to fear, but the only thing she can conjure without passing out is a crow]
-Clothes: White knee-length dress with black leggings.
-Past: She had a normal past and a normal life, has been in Fairy Tail since really young, and never knew her parents. She met Ruka, her current husband, at the age of 15 and it was love at first sight. Then they got married at the age of 25, and always wanted a child, but she but only got pregnant around 8 months before the games, so she's now pregnant for about 8 months. With the help of her husbands magic, she doesn't look pregnant and can move around normally, but she still pukes a lot.
-Family: Husband [Ruka Haley], Child [unborn, Rin Haley if a girl, Ryan Haley if boy]
Love yah XD
| JJun chapter 19 . 9/9/2013
Sorry for not review in the many last chapters. I get very ill with a very bad disease. Now I'm cured and waiting the next. Fade's demise was kinda shocking. I cried a lot seeing Fade dying. I don't know if he is going to reapper but thanks for all the time you gave him :)
| ChocoChipzCookie chapter 18 . 8/22/2013
3 it nyau XD Urm... If you still need an OC, here's mine [I actually have two OC ideas XD but idk if you still need them, so I'll just post one for now]
-Name: Nirvana Yukihara
-Appearance: Waist-length black hair, curled at the botom. Wide amethyst eyes
-Personality: Dense Stubborn Sadistic Optimistic Can be silent Cheerful Doesn't feel guilt or sadness when it comes to betrayal or killing
-Magic: Lucifer's [cursed] Chains [ she can summon and manipulate chains at will. The edge of it is sharp, so it can stab someone, and also go underground. She can use the chains to seal [use it as a medium] but it takes a lot of time and energy.
-Clothes: Wears a red jacket with a hoodie [like Gumi's one in Matryoshka, except it's open], red, black and white checkered shirt, denim shorts.
-Past: She was born in a assassins guild, and her mother is one of the best ones in the guild. She was lied to by her mother that that was nothing wrong with taking someone's life [to make sure she doesn't hesitate during killing, and she grew up believing that, but she doesn't kill un-necessarily. She's really nice and sweet, it's just that she thinks there is completely nothing wrong with killing. When a group of Fairy Tail people were sent to stop the guild, she was taken in by Fairy Tail. She didn't even think twice about leaving the guild and her mother.
-Family: Her Mother [in prison] Mayu Yukihara