|Reviews for Rhapsody in Green|
| Lady Amiee chapter 1 . 9/17/2013
Well, what can I say. I love this already. I have been wanting a decent 'After the crucible' story for a while. This is brilliant. I really enjoyed the idea of the telepathy, especially EDI doing it, just picturing the reactions of people hearing her in their head, especially Garrus. Your writing is great, and I love how you really paint a picture for me, great work! Love this.
| Church Shepard chapter 2 . 7/12/2013
This is surprisingly good. I've always hated the idea of Synthesis and never allowed any of my Sheps through any play through to pick it. Here however you've been able to peek my curiosity. Organics apparently do not like the change (Which is one of the reasons I never picked it) and EDI looks to be trying to force it upon them. It makes me wonder exactly where this will go. I will undoubtedly continue reading.
Church "Caboose" Shepard
| Osage chapter 21 . 5/17/2013
Aww that was way too sweet! I love how Garrus got the peace he deserved, he's going to make a great father. It's good to see that he could move on with Atrin even though Shepard will always be his hero. Your story was very well written and nicely plotted, I like getting a solid conclusion after so many wondful twists and turns. Thank you for writing this!
| M.B.Liddle chapter 1 . 5/13/2013
A nice continuation from your previous work. This chapter has some good emotional impact and colours Garrus in just the right balance of mourning without making him completely morose. It would be nice to see a little more on the differences that have come from the new synthesis, but I realize this is only the opening chapter.
| MASTER-OF-SUPRISE chapter 21 . 5/5/2013
This was a pretty good series. Though I have mixed feelings about the hive mind thing. I highly doubt everyone would be happy about it. I'd like to see a sequel that showed not everyone is happy with this decision. Like you did with Synthesis. I'm curious about how Nazduz responds to Garrus's advice to oust Harbinger from leadership.
As well as his affirmation it was an extermination. I'd like to see if EDI still disagrees when it comes from an actual Reaper. There are more questions in my mind but it's your story not mine. It's your choice if you want to continue it. Just know you left me wanting more.
| Osage chapter 20 . 5/1/2013
That was so sweet! It's nice to see Atrin and Garrus take a much needed rest after saving the universe once again. Is Garrus adapting? Because breaking through stasis is no easy feat. Also, Atrin killing Elerta was a fantastic turn of events. I think it's easy to question actions when you're watching from the sidelines, but it's not until you take action yourself that you understand why some folks just have to pull the trigger.
Elerta's plan was messed up. I mean didn't she learn from the Prothans how a galaxy under one totalarian regime just doesn't work? That was pathetic. So I'm glad she's gone.
My only gripe was the limited role of the Rachnii. What was their purpose beyond telling Garrus that Elerta was bad news? I think in hindsight we could've done without their inclusion but I'll reserve final thoughts for the epilogue.
Other than that I love the way you write action. I could clearly visualize everyone's movements and the carnage all around them. Can't wait to read more of your other stories!
| Osage chapter 19 . 4/27/2013
It's a sad day when self-proclaimed empresses can't grasp the power of free will. I mean seriously, it'd be so much easier for her to ask for help rather than taking a full grab for control. But I guess that's just people in power in general. Elerta will learn the hard way.
Also kudos to Atrin's dad for growing a pair and confronting the crazy asari. It's refreshing to see that not everyone has their head up an asshole. Although when they talk about a galaxy-wide consensus my eyebrow raises. I mean weren't Javik's people all about 'one galaxy united under one, albeit totalitarian, rule'? And look how they turned out. I just think if everyone's connected it would be easier for beings from other galaxies to destabilize this one. It would take one localized virus or whatnot to compromise the entire consensus. Scary thoughts. *Accompanied by reaper sounds*
| Full-Paragon chapter 21 . 4/25/2013
And you did write a happy ending. I think you did what you set out to do, and wrote the beet synthesis ending possible. That means I only loath it SLIGHTLY less then others, but you still did a very good job. From the stand point of literary craftsmanship this is a very solid work with relatable characters that espouses a philosophy without becoming preachy. Good work.
| Full-Paragon chapter 20 . 4/24/2013
Well, I can see WHY some people would think this is a happy ending, but honestly, I feel more in common with Elerta then with the heroes of this story. I would want to reverse the change personally, and have nothing to do with the Reapers or their spawn. Because fundamentally, the Reapers never changed. They never asked for forgiveness, never said what they did was wrong. They just made excuses and said they were sorry.
But that's not riff on your writing. You still do good job with the pathos and breathing life into your characters, I just disagree with the story from a philosophical standpoint.
| Osage chapter 18 . 4/24/2013
Well our rachnii friends return with another song and Garrus isn't too happy to hear it. I don't blame him. The little buggies are still too far apart to be called real allies. Plus there's something strange about their 'song' wasn't it used to indoctrinate them? All I can say is Garrus better run once he starts seeing oily shadows.
I loved the bits with Circuits. He's such a kid that it's kind of endearing. His questions on love were just heartbreaking, it's too bad that Geth can't just cure themselves in the same way they've been able to when they had synthetic bodies.
Looking forward to hearing more about those lasers! It can either be a really good thing or a really bad thing at this point.
| Aeternix chapter 21 . 4/22/2013
"After all that's happened, this ended up being his greatest achievement. Well, his and Atrin's."
After all that's happened, all the suffering and trials, it ends here. With new life. Like how the new synthetic beam that washed over the galaxy brought unity to broken races, this little egg, his child, brought Garrus unity within himself. He can live now, live in the present, and live in a way that Teresa would want. Shepard may have faded from his heart, but the memories are still there and they will live on through Atrin and his child.
There was a great emotional weight to this chapter, such love and joy brought on by the end of it all. I loved how you moved from these three scenes, though I wish there was a little more connectivity, I loved the moments you chose and found they were perfect for what you were trying to say thematically.
As well, I adored some of the images and ideas you had in this ending. Stuff that reached not only back to the beginning chapter of this story, but the begin chapter of Mass Effect in general as well.
Moments like this: "She didn't wear the suit anymore, Garrus realized for the hundredth time since they've met up this year. He didn't mind, the new clothes suited her well, but to him Tali was inseparable from her suit. It seemed he wasn't the only one who learned to let the past go during the last year"
Or this: "EDI and Joker were looking at each other with such hope in their eyes. They didn't have to vocalize their thoughts. The others almost didn't have to use the telepathic connection to figure out what they were thinking. Everyone knew they dreamed about having a child of their own."
Created such joy, such emotion that I can only start to applaud for what you did there. I love the metaphor of Tali without her suit, I love the image and dang, I just about love everything about it in general. There was nothing wrong with that image and it was something noted on in the first few chapters and was still touched on by the end. This is called thematically connecting your story and tying up loose ends, something you perfectly placed in the finale.
There were a few moments overall you can work on it in your next stories. Stuff like pacing in action scenes, pacing for dialog/ exposition, and knowing when to expand the chapter or shorten it are all stuff that needed some work. But when I look back at the amazing ride I had up to this, those small problems don't matter. I'm only bringing them up because I want to see you become the best writer you can be (cause damn you got emotions down pat).
Finally, the ending proper. Oh my goodness, I loved the story aspect of it and I'm glad you ended it that way.
It brings home this whole concept of unity, hope, and love. This was so darn good that I cannot fathom the story without that scene at the end. Him referencing his father and the adventures of the Reaper War was a great moment, I wish it lasted longer.
I must say that this story was a joy to read from beginning to end. I cannot wait to see what other ideas you have down your sleeve.
Until next time, thank you for the ride, it was worth it.
| Osage chapter 17 . 4/19/2013
Oh boy, so the rachnii are going to join this party. I dunno how to feel about that, they're notorious for being a bit...overwhelming (yeah here's looking at you queenie). Not to mention if this new threat is somehow alerted to the Rachnii's current home world and takes control of the queen we can have another war on our hands.
But on the bright side I'm so happy for Garrus and Atrin. There's no awkwardness, no angst just good old fashioned love here and that's so refreshing! I can't wait to see what you do with these two. As always your writing is perfect, evocative and descriptive so please don't change anything and keep up the great work, its a pleasure to read!
| Aeternix chapter 20 . 4/18/2013
"Garrus slept even longer, finally finding some peace."
The emotions in this chapter were on high gear, with numerous plot points converging together for the climax of the story. And wow, was it ever worth it. There were a lot of good plot specific moments where previously mentioned ideas and concepts returned in this chapter. The Rachni connectivity, Atrin's slow change, her adoration for Garrus, Garrus' guilt, and his and Sol's reconciliation at last. These moments were powerful and when they came together them formed a cohesive whole that was satisfying for the conclusion. I especially enjoyed Atrin's moment after she killed Elerta. There was a deep truth to that scene, one that was laced with emotion. Garrus' comment was painful to see and it was great that there was a price that had to be paid for the salvation of the galaxy. Atrin had to lose her innocence, her shielded spirit to save the galaxy and, like Garrus, had to lose her mental protection as well. That parallel was nicely done.
Some comments would be how quick this chapter was. It was quite long, I understand, though I wish it would've been longer. It felt extremely quick to me and slightly rushed over the ending. Elerta never really put up a huge fight against Naduz and so it felt a bit too easy for our heroes to waltz in and basically win without much trouble. Also, Naduz's and Garrus' lack of concern over the collateral damage surprised me as I thought these characters would be more concerned with possible innocents, or even the asari government seeing this as an attack against their union. In the end, it felt a little too easy for our heroes as it seemed slightly anti-climactic in terms of action.
However, the emotional punch was brilliant overall and I enjoyed this chapter as a reconciliation of Garrus’ and Atrin's character. Though it was quick, it still had poignancy in moments, so it retained its emotional core. This story has always been about love, redemption, and the walls that push us away from one another. In the end those walls finally collapsed, not only literally, but also figuratively for each of our main characters. It's been quite a ride indeed and I'm said to see only one more chapter to go.
| Full-Paragon chapter 19 . 4/18/2013
Esh. I was starting to like this, and the Reapers were growing on me, but a hive mind? I really don't know. I would rather people all be individuals working together out of love then a hive mind that works together because of the consequences of not doing so. And the Reapers are invading Thessia again.
Bleh, I'll keep reading, but you are bringing up a lot of things I find very uncomfortable.
| Full-Paragon chapter 18 . 4/16/2013
That was a great capture of the rachni. You're also building up a lot of things that I can't wait to see the result of, especially with the call backs to how the deathboxes worked.