|Reviews for The Life and Times|
| Thoth19 chapter 7 . 3/18
This was amazing. Sure Hinata is pretty OOC, but she's a really fun version. Before the plot really gets "plotty" the jokes were great. The harem was a great twist on the standard way that goes down. I really had a good time reading this. If only it continued.
| troyguffey chapter 7 . 2/6
I REALLY LOVE THIS STORY! Coming to the end and finding out it's been dead since 2012 makes me sick!
| 4everfictional chapter 5 . 1/15
So dark, so good! XD
| 4everfictional chapter 4 . 1/14
I love the insight! XD
| 4everfictional chapter 3 . 1/14
Fun fact: Sasuke was originally created because the publishers wouldn't wouldn't green light the manga without Naruto having a 'rival.'
Love the chapter! XD
| 4everfictional chapter 2 . 1/14
I love it when yanderes still have a brain (for some reason they're almost always written to make the most rookie mistakes when it comes to the object of their obsession)! Great chapter! XD
| 4everfictional chapter 1 . 1/14
I'm definitely a fan! XD
| Guest17 chapter 4 . 1/7
I guess it's on me to be disappointed that this did not end up reaching places I wanted it to. However, it is, after all, just a story. Your writing style is great and the stream of consciousness that is presented through Hinata is quite believable (if the topics discussed weren't so... bland). All in all, in terms of world-building I think it had a lot going for it. But again, that's my fault for expecting a level like that of Time Braid from a different story. I do salute the good attempt, but I just can't continue reading... I'm bored out of my wits. I hope you take this as constructive criticism, since the last thing I want to do is offend you. I think the places to improve on (which hopefully you have considered now since this fic was last updated in 2012) are:
1) Enjoyment. I just feel like things aren't happening fast enough to keep me interested, or they are dragging it out too long (to show struggle, I assume) for a RIDICULOUS amount of time. There's nothing to fear when picking things up. The words are in your hands. You have the ability to slow things down with your writing style. Let the action commence as the story unfolds. There's no need to be scared of a rush.
2) Monologue length. The paragraphs are heavy and I find myself skipping over QUITE a few if only just so something will happen and it be not just a boring monologue. Sorry.
On the other hand, things I think you excelled at are:
2) The story.
| Hainako chapter 1 . 9/27/2016
Really enjoying th story, would have preferred a bit more development with Hinata on the earlier time loops but still good
I'm extremely curious how Haku is going to be part of this story
| Trace Reading chapter 6 . 8/28/2016
Juugo's body secretes an enzyme which interacts with his chakra coils to siphon and convert nature chakra but he has very little control over it and the influx of super-juice tends to make him go crazy.
Like being under the influence of a psychoactive drug that also works as a hyper-steroid.
| Trace Reading chapter 4 . 8/27/2016
Anko's 24 in part I, though.
| keichan2 chapter 7 . 8/26/2016
I just discovered your story, and I have to say that you have some very interesting idea!
Other than the fact that I’m not fond of the “warning the reader that there are problems coming” style you use at the beginning of chapters, I would love to read more!
Thanks for sharing!
| Ibskib chapter 6 . 4/3/2016
I noticed a problem with merged words often when you use cursive for a single word, here are the ones I could find, there were some in the other chapters, but this one was the worst:
Oh, and this:
have not drank - have not drunk
| passanger chapter 7 . 3/13/2016
I enjoyed this story very much. Thank you.
Is it going to be continued?
| Lil-lo chapter 1 . 10/22/2015
I just discovered this fic, and I'm a bit sad that it appears abandoned (Hopefully you are ok). Regardless, there is so much to enjoy here that I wanted to share.
Characterization of Hinata is the biggest surprise and joy. At this point in time the manga is over, and the series has made a lot of choices that really ruined my desire to read it or watch midway...nowadays I look for fanfic writers, like you, who are still able to unearth the spark that got me into the series. I was only a few paragraphs in and you reminded me that I used to like Hinata as a character-unfortunately different things ruined her for me. Then you got further into the loops and she turned into this determined, capable, pragmatic ninja that I can't help but want to see how does she finally break the circle.
Another thing you did that I loved, loved, LOVED, was wrote about underneath motives that matched up to the goals these characters would have for this world. Chunnin match-ups weeding out kids-Brilliant!. I love that this was something you found a way to credit to the characters (although I wouldn't be surprised if it was really all Kishimoto doing it for the same reasons). You also expanded on each stage of the test to chunin situations in a way that makes me want to at minimum re-watch the first anime. Last, I love when Sandime is actually written as a military commander making decisions that make sense. When I'm done' reading this fic, I'm going to see if you wrote anything else for Naruto. I also hope that maybe you'll get the spark to write more for this fic.