|Reviews for Legend of the Dream Keeper: The Lord of Nightmares|
| fiction idea chapter 2 . 1/2/2013
we haven't heard from pax in months.
we can only assume that he... he...
got a game over!
pax the dreamer: 2009-2013.
fiction idea too lazy too log in
I'm drowning in the sky!
| Guest chapter 3 . 12/1/2012
I swear dude, if you dont update i will commit suicide! Got that? So if dont want that on your concious, you better start writing!
| ShadowRock21 chapter 3 . 10/9/2012
...Wow! You finally updated! Honestly it took me almost a year to read book 1 and 2. And now I can read book 3! YAY FOR ME!...and you for making a serious summary!...MERLIN...WAS...GOOMPA...or at least ate him...and now he's...FREE...poor Pax...or you...I don't know you both have the same name. And nightmares like Coron give nightmares like me a good name! I mean look at my username! ShadowRock21! It sounds like a nightmares name!...minus the 21 part...
Well peace out dreamer! And remember not all shadows take you to the wrong way! Let the SHADOWS guide you for once! CAUSE THEY RAWK!(no pun intended)
| Neonz chapter 1 . 9/22/2012
Great to see the next installment is up! I really enjoyed the first two and I've been checking every month or so for this one. I'd nearly given up. :D
I love that Goombella gets to stay, she's a great character both in the games and how you write with her. Goompa being Merlin was a complete surprise to say the least. O_O
If I could go into critical mode for a few moments:
Spelling and grammar looks really good to me.
You write dialogue excellently, but your imagery on just about everything is a bit lacking. I envisoned the entire second chapter in a blank white space, for example. xD I know you said something about them being "in the sky" in the very first sentence, but since this is an entirely new area that I knew nothing about, it would have been really helpful to have been reminded of it every so often. Like, "Pax felt the breeze on his face and tried not to look down." for a completely random example.
You also didn't give any description to any of the characters at the end of the third chapter - now, I know what you're thinking! "These people already know what Dimentio and Count Bleck and etc. look like; this is a fanfiction after all!" But honestly the lack of formalities left me a bit confused on whether or not I've seen these characters before. You'll also lose any readers who were fans of PM and PM:TTYD, but not SPM.
Going along with that thought, Pax meeting Tippi was really anticlimatic. Tippi is like the Goombella of SPM in her role, except she's CONSTANTLY on the screen whether you want her to be or not. I was expecting something a little more interesting than "oh hi I'm Tippi let's talk about Coron now", if you get what I'm saying.
Speaking of characters... are you going to include the Pixls as well? I mean, they were never really big characters, and there's so many of them. I'd think it would be a bit much, but that's just me!
Also I've never played Kingdom Hearts so a bit of chapter two went over my head. :( Well, for that reason and the huge amount of background information. xD Not a huge deal. I just like getting information slowly. That might be a personal thing, I'm not sure.
Remember that your writing style is your writing style, so I hope you don't feel like I'm picking on you or anything, because I'm certainly not! I've been getting loads of support for my writing, and my readers have helped my writing skills develop miles by telling me how I can improve. Take my opinions as compliments that I took the time to write this out, if nothing else!
I'm looking forward to the next update! I kind of realize that you haven't been able to stick to the schedule, but that's totally understandable. I'm supposed to update one of my fics every Tuesday and can barely do that; three times a week is beyond impressive! xD
| Riku Courtier chapter 2 . 9/20/2012
Pax, only one word describes how epic all of this is tying together: EPIC. And OH MY GOSH! BIGGEST PLOT TWIST EVER! 8O GOOMPA IS A DREAMER?! Or...well...he was...kind of...*facepalms* Oh goodness, I feel bad for our heroes now...xD Goompa is going to be the death of them, I just know it. xDD
| nick chapter 1 . 9/17/2012
* Slowly wanders in silently... *
Yikes... I'm late... Ehehe...
Nice to see you again Pax! Glad to see you haven't given up this series, ( I had no doubts... Eheheheh. ) and huzzah to Super Paper Mario... How shall pax mess up, I mean, save the world this time?
I'm quite ecstatic for this book, so to refresh my memory, I shall rekindle my knowledge of dreamkeeper lore... In other words read the previous books again... ( It has been quite awhile... )
Time to dive into the third book! ( After refreshing... )
* Note: Has not read any of this book at the time of writing this review obviously... *
I do wonder how Goombella ( and everyone else, but they will at most play a minor role I'm certain. ) will fit in this story, seeing as she is very much still alive... Unlike... ( I think...? I did read the story a while ago... ) * Slightly twitches a little. * And the fact that this is Super Paper Mario, completely out of continuity with the other Paper Marios... ( Well this is fanfiction... ) Better yet, how will mario be involved...? He is aware now of the body stealing function... A pondering it is... Or I can just read the story...
Forgive me pax..., but after seeing this shall be a kingdom hearts/mario crossover, ( thingy...) ( which I obviously know nothing about. ) my energy felt an immediate minor drop, either I must read up on kingdom hearts, or face the consequences, but I shall do it just for this story... ( I knew this story was a kingdom hearts related book from the start but still... ) * sigh... *
* Looks down at the other reviews, see's Capital-N-Nick * Huh... There's always another Nick isn't there? For all we know, he could be me in another dimension. ( makes perfect sense. )
* Acts nonchalant about the fact nobody reviewed the sword of dreams's final chapter, or his lack of music detail and philosophy... * ( Actually taking a philosophy class now... eheh. )
| Vita chapter 3 . 9/9/2012
It's short but it is good. Keep the good work up.
| Guest chapter 3 . 9/7/2012
mimi rixamim from book 1.
knew it from book 1! great, cant wait, and thanks for all the ratings. lol jk.
fiction idea too lazt to log in
im drowning in the sky!
| Sir Starlll chapter 3 . 9/7/2012
So, was the ability to flip between dimensions just a joke? Like, was Bestovius just a senile old man who gave Mario an imaginary ability? Or, will it turn out that he actually CAN flip between dimensions, later-on? When it's imperative that he flip from 2-D to 3-D?
Fun fact: The idea to let the player turn from 2-D to 3-D actually started from when one of the game developers was on a train, and saw the same landscape from multiple perspectives.
...So, yeah... now you know... that...
...It's HARD, reviewing chapters a second time! I mean, it's not impossible, because I can usually find something to comment on that I haven't when I was proof-reading it, but... yeah... that's my excuse if I send any BS reviews...
Anyway, keep the chapters coming, and I apologize for this (and any future) bad reviews.
P.S. I'm actually REALLY excited to see you write 'Francis'... He's one of my all-time favorite Paper Mario characters...
| Vita chapter 2 . 9/6/2012
That explains a lot. Keep up the good work. Your chapters are great.
| Fanaticofmanythings chapter 2 . 9/5/2012
SO MUCH KH
SO MUCH SQUEE
SO MUCH EVERYTHING
YOU ALREADY KNOW ALL MY REACTIONS
CAUSE I SAID THEM ALREADY
| Capital-N-Nick chapter 2 . 9/5/2012
(Sorry, accidentally hit the 'post' button.)
Coron made me chuckle, for some reason... maybe it's because I'm wearing a black shirt? Maybe my heart changes to reflect the color of my sleeve! Wait... I think I messed up that expression...
Anyway I'm enjoying these first few chapters, even if they're mostly exposition. Just such a wonderful cast of characters to be the ones debriefing us.
P.S. GOOMPA IS FREE! MAY THE CORNSTARCH JUNGLE OF PIKACHUS RAIN FROM THE OCEAN ONCE MORE!
| Capital-N-Nick chapter 2 . 9/5/2012
I can review from my PHONE, now? Huh...
I find Nozan really interesting, for some reason. I mean, he isn't exactly brimming with personality, nor has he DONE much, beyond stalk Tim, yet I can't help but want to learn more about him...
You're making clear references to Mario, Disney, AND Kingdom Hearts? If this was published, it'd be a copyright NIGHTMARE...
| Riku Courtier chapter 1 . 9/1/2012
:D Huzzah! An Epic Start To An Epic Story!
Honestly can't wait for more of this! It's good to be able to read stuff like this from you again, Pax! :D
| Vita chapter 1 . 9/1/2012
I like it. I can't wait to find out what will happens next.