|Reviews for Crossfire|
| Warrior717 chapter 19 . 8/14/2014
I got chills reading the very ending! And there were so many great moments bewteen Jim and McCoy here; The humor was endearing, Jim surprising McCoy was a bit predictable (at least for me), but the buildup to that moment when he first sees Jim in the shuttle was brilliantly written and executed. Even though i knew Jim was going to be in the shuttle the moment McCoy found him missing from his dorm, i still felt the anticipation. Wonderful job!
The humor was also endearing, and my heart was warmed when McCoy told Jim that he was proud of him. This, by far, is my favorite bromance moment between them. Jim asking for reassurance from Bones is always incredibly sweet too.
You tied up your loose ends smoothly, and gave us something to cherish when you wrote this story. I don't think I will ever stop being impressed by your writing talents, and your ability to touch people's lives through your work. I believe that at times, you can learn some things about a person through their writing. From what I can see of you so far, is someone beautiful.
| Warrior717 chapter 18 . 8/14/2014
Awww ...I can't express how touching it was when McCoy got the cream for Jim's coffee without Jim having to say anything. It's the little things like that, that really speak volumes about their friendship, and how well they know each other. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 17 . 8/14/2014
WOW...out of all the possible scenarios running through my head, I was *not* expecting THAT. This chapter was amazing! in fact, this whole story really is. Jim's little breakdown there near the end, when his laughs became more like sobs, was heart-wrenching and poignant. I was waiting for it, and you did not disappoint. The guilt he felt over Tambe's death after he found out the truth, that he inadvertly caused the shuttle to crash. Even though he couldn't have known that by fiddling with it, it would actually make it worse. The emotions in this chapter were intense, and I couldn't believe that Sven was actually the cause behind the crash. Was he really that insensitive that his experiment led to Tambe's death? Or had he just become desensitized? I...don't even get me started on him. Just...wow.
On to read more! Why? Because I literally can't stop. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 16 . 8/13/2014
I LOVED absolutely everything about this chapter! The tension between Pike, Jim, and McCoy was marvelously written, and I really admired Jim for his humility here. I'm so glad Jim is finally realizing how fortunate he is for having a friend like McCoy. You don't find many out there like him.
I can't wait to read more! :)
| Warrior717 chapter 15 . 7/31/2014
Poor Jim. This turn of events isn't completely unexpected though, what with Jim's growing paranoia and other stressful factors. Somehow i think this is exactly what the real culprit (s) want. With Jim appearing nonsensical and paranoid about everything, it will most likely divert attention away from what's really going on. That's my theory anyway.
I especially loved the part when Jim told McCoy that he was bringing him with him after McCoy told Jim he could go anywhere he wants someday. That was very sweet. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 14 . 7/15/2014
I want to know why they stopped the investigation. At this point, I wouldn't blame Jim one bit if decided to pursue his own investigation.
Some great bromance moments in this chapter, I didn't expect Jim to loose it like he did, but I'm glad Bones was able to reel him back in. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 13 . 7/14/2014
YAY! I seriously couldn't stop from smiling as i read this brilliant chapter, and i have decided that it's, no doubt, one of my absolute favorites from you.
Firstly, I was very much looking forward to the shuttle/simulator scene with Jim and McCoy, and you did not disappoint. I love the idea that by Jim helping McCoy with his own fear, he, in return, was inevitably being forced to face his. While at the same time, McCoy was able to be distracted from his own fears because of his concern for Jim. It's beautifully ironic, and intriguing to see the change in dynamics between these two men in this particular situation. They both give each other strength when the other needs it, and reminds me that their relationship is in some ways symbiotic. They not only compliment each other in the best ways possible, but they depend on each other in so many ways. Essentially, one could not exist for long without the other. The shuttle scene, even though on smaller scale, was a great example of this.
I'm still not sure how to feel about Romano at this point. He seemed genuinely surprised about Jim's accusation, and yet...he could be throwing Jim off. I want to believe he's all around a good guy, but I'm still on the fence about him.
And the trial...what can I say, really, except that it was ***PERFECT.*** I was hoping for a dramatic trial like this, and imagine my elation when that's exactly what we got. I appreciated the fact that the doctors were sympathetic, though objective in their questioning. I loved that they really listened to Jim when he defended McCoy (how awesome was that? :)) and though there were heightened emotions (one of my favorite parts), it was never overdone. I found the trial scene extremely poignant, especially when McCoy told Jim everything for the first time. Besides, for some reason I've always immensely enjoyed scenes where everyone's attention is on one or two of the main characters. In this case, the parts in the scene where Jim was being questioned or defending McCoy, and all eyes were on him (including Bones), were some of the best moments in the story.
The ending of this chapter was, of course, very sweet. The idea that McCoy was attempting to meet requirements for post aboard a starship immediately after graduation, despite his fears of space, really spoke volumes of his relationship to Jim, and what Jim means to him.
There were so many great moments in this chapter, and I am excited to see what comes next! :)
| Warrior717 chapter 12 . 7/14/2014
I really enjoyed the scene between Jim and Ramono at the beginning. I loved the casualness of it, and I felt Jim's uneasiness right along with him. I don't know, I still feel a little suspicious of Romono, partially because I really don't know a lot about his character, and everything about the investigation is still up in the air at this point.
Awww... and I ***LOVED*** the whole scene with Jim and McCoy in the lunch hall! It was so adorably sweet how nervous he was when he asked Jim for help with his shuttle training. It must have been pretty difficult for McCoy to do that (I'm sure it doesn't help his pride much), but It was so touching to see how desparate he was (and that Jim recogized that), and that he trust Jim enough to know that Jim would never think less of him for asking. I really hope that Jim will end up helping him, even if he is afraid. I couldn't stand it if Jim let McCoy down, and besides, this might help force Jim to get over his own fear. "Kill two birds with one stone", so to speak. I'm optimistically looking forward to the scene with them both on the shuttle, it would seriously make such an awesome bromance moment. :o)
I thought certain parts of Jim's trial were surprisingly emotional, even if Jim didn't allow it to show. Especially, the past where Jim told the admirals to not tarnish Tambe's memory. I found that particular part moving.
When Jim nearly revealed that he was aware of the classified information about the last year's Terra Prime incident, I kept thinking that this is what Pike was trying to warn him about when he told Jim that not everything is about him. Jim appeared to be ahead before he brought this up, and if he continued to think about himself in this situation (thinking that Terra Prime was targeting *him* specifically) then not only could he have screwed things up with his trial, but he might be missing the real possibility that someone else could have sabotaged the shuttle. Perhaps, the sabotage isn't as personal as Jim thinks it is? If so, I'd say that Pike's words might have carried even more meaning than I originally thought. Maybe even some foreshadowing? Regardless, I was glad when Jim wised up and took Toland's subtle warning seriously, and stopped while he was ahead.
Speaking of Toland, I was a little surprised that she would even risk talking with Jim right after the trial (though she appeared to be inconspicuous about it) because wouldn't that be considered a conflict of interest since she obviously has a significant influence in the outcome of his trial?
Also, I really liked the drama between Jim and Toland in the last bit when she referenced Tarsus. It was kind of a low blow for her to bring it up, even if she was trying to make a point. I think Jim's reaction was perfect; i could definitely see, with the sort of petulant side he allows to show from time to time, him doing that. Besides that, she brought up a very painful part of his past, so i don't blame him for reacting that way. I do hope there will be some resolution between them before the story is finished. I enjoy the interesting dynamic between these two, and I would love for them to remain amicable and respectful towards each other in the future. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 11 . 7/11/2014
I really enjoyed the first scene between Jim and McCoy. I often like "quiet" scenes like that, when there isn't a whole lot going on, because they tend to be more character-driven and more personal. I also loved the tension you could see building between them. I hope that the tension in this scene wasn't isolated, and that we'll see more. I actually like to see challenges (on a deeper and more emotional level) in the best of friendships, and I would like to see Jim and McCoy work through something like that. I think in the end, those challenges is what brings friends closer together.
It's good to see Scotty again, and to finally have some answers. Though, we seem to have even more questions now then we did before. I half expected Jim to have a full-on panic attack when returning to the shuttle training, and I wouldn't have blamed him for it if he did.
| Warrior717 chapter 10 . 7/11/2014
(((Leonard snorted in exasperation, but he had to admit, Jim’s teasing did help loosen the nerves. A little bit, anyway.
“See? Just like that. Whatever it is... you’re a great doctor, Bones. I’ve seen you sit up until all hours trying to solve medical mysteries and do your research. Malpractice? I’ll bet you just had some outburst of raw genius and the brass can’t keep up with your brilliance.”
“That’s you, you high-speed wise-ass. I’m just a doctor.” He let his shoulders slump. “And the same rules apply to me as to every other idiot with a medical license.”
“Well, was the patient okay?”
Leonard froze again, staring straight ahead. For several seconds, he couldn’t bring himself to even look at Jim. Finally, he swallowed tightly and said, “I hope so.”
“Well, if you had a hand in it, then he... or she... will be.” Jim’s words were full of conviction. “The board will rule in your favor.”
“You can’t know that, Jim.” And Leonard couldn’t bring himself to tell Jim exactly why there was no way to know that. Not for this. Not now.
“No, but I’d stake my life on it. On you.” He flashed another reassuring look. “That’s gotta count for something.”
Instead of feeling reassured, though, Doctor Leonard McCoy felt as though something inside of him had broken and crumbled in on itself. Before Jim could say anything, however, he nodded blankly. “It does, Jim. I’d stake my life on you, too. I’ll see you when I get back.”)))
So far, this has got to be one of my favorite Jim and McCoy scenes ever. We knew before that Jim and McCoy trusted each other with their lives (their actions proved that), but to actually hear (read) them say it out loud has a different, more poignant effect in this case. I'm a firm believer that actions speak louder than words, and as an aspiring writer myself, sometimes utilizing the "show, don't tell" method is a lot more powerful. In this particular case, however, I found the "tell" method quite moving. I think that's because it's not typical of men to share their feelings out loud, so when it does happen, it catches my attention. Besides that, there is some real emotion behind what they're saying to each other here, and it feels very authentic. In addition, I just admire the utter faith they have in each other, and how something as simple as Jim's teasing can help calm McCoy's nerves a bit. The detail about Jim's love for a particular type of trees on the campus, and McCoy being reminded of Jim because of it, was a sweet touch as well. :)
I feel like we've hit a road block with the investigation at this point, especially with McCoy being discouraged, somewhat, from his own investigation. I'm also assuming that Scotty's mysterious disappearance has something to do with Delta Vega. I could be wrong though.
I was intrigued by McCoy's trial, and i wonder if any of his conspiracy theories are actually true. The scene where McCoy was cleaning up his project and then started comparing it to his father's death, was very sad. The news that his mother basically rejected him after that was extremely heartbreaking. When you get involved in a story like this (and the writer, such as yourself, has the ability to make these characters feel so real), you can't help but feel for the characters. I really felt for McCoy here. I'll say it again, but I would *love* to read a story/one-shot that gives us more background concerning his father's death, and McCoy's reaction to that. (Jim being present of course).
I'm very intrigued, and I can't wait to read more! :)
| Warrior717 chapter 9 . 7/10/2014
Okay, first off, the scene between Pike and Jim was absolutely fantastic! I resisted the urge to applaud after Pike put Jim in his place. Though he was a bit harsh in reminding Jim that it's not all about him, it was completely necessary. As amazing as Jim is, he really needed to hear it.
It's so interesting to see Jim shaping out to be the great man that we know he can be, under Pike's and McCoy's influence. One thing I loved about the movie, "Star Trek Into Darkness", was that Pike wasn't afraid to call Jim out on his mistakes. Yet at the same time, he always encouraged Jim to be better, because he believed he could. To me, those are the best qualities of what paternal love should be. We should always lift up our children and believe in them, but most importantly, we shouldn't be afraid to point out when they're doing something wrong, even if we have to ultimately let them make the right decision. I think you have captured these qualities in Pike perfectly. He's such a great fatherly influence for Jim, and though I've read stories where people have represented Pike fairly well, *you* have exemplified unique qualities and a certain devotion to the character that I cherish beyond words. I'm constantly impressed by your talents, and your work.
Lastly, I enjoyed the last scene between Jim and McCoy, especially, Jim's voicemail. I got a kick out of the fact that Jim knew McCoy so well that he was able to predict exactly how McCoy would react and feel in the moments of listening to the voicemail. I found it very amusing. :)
I hope that Jim will listen to Pike's and McCoy's advice and wait on doing his own investigation. I wonder if Jim will be mad when he finds out McCoy has been doing a little of his own investigating, or will he just appreciate McCoy's efforts? I'm looking forward to finding out. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 8 . 7/9/2014
Yes! This is getting really exciting! I *love* how McCoy takes care of Jim, and it was so unexpected and sweet that McCoy actually came right out and told Jim that he likes to take care of him. Seriously, that was awesome! :)
I will always love the bantering between Jim and McCoy, and i found Jim's mock-suggestiveness pretty comical, especially because he knows it gets a reaction from McCoy. These lines were priceless:
((Bones slammed the dresser drawer shut with a snap, glaring across the room at Jim. “Seriously, Jim? A couple of weeks without sex, and you’re this fixated? Give it a rest already!”
"I’ve been giving it a rest for almost two weeks. That’s the problem.”
Bones groaned. “Then save it for your own dorm. Maybe you can get Sven to help.”
The banter was starting to feel more comfortable. More like home. Jim grinned mischievously as he sat down on the couch and leaned back, giving Bones an appraising look. “But you’re more attractive than Sven. Maybe you could – ”
“And that will be quite enough, Jim.”
“I’ve got enough, if that’s what you’d like.” He waggled his eyebrows for good measure.
Bones rolled his eyes. “Why I put up with you, I don’t even know –“))
I'm very intrigued about this new development with Romano, and I wonder too if McCoy's suspicions are correct.
I'm also curious as to who contacted Winona, and why they felt they had the right to do that. My suspicions are that Pike was somehow involved. For whatever reason, though, i'm sure he would have had good intentions.
I froze when McCoy realized that he forgot to activate his earphones, and I wondered how he could have made such a careless mistake. Obviously, he was distracted, but seriously? Not good.
This is getting really interesting, and I can't wait to read more. :)
| Warrior717 chapter 7 . 7/8/2014
This chapter was a bit slower pace than the others, i think, but it was still good. I understand that not every chapter will be suspenseful or action-packed, or even have significant development towards the main plot. Sometimes it's more important to take the time to dive into the character's mental and emotional well-being, and i think you did a beautiful job of that in this chapter. In fact, one if my favorite parts of a story, often times, is the emotional aspect of it.
Here we are shown, quite vividly, whats going on through Jim's mind. While there is rational thought (Jim wanting so badly to be present at Tambe's memorial) to justify his actions, there is still a disjointedness in his line of thinking that painfully reminds us that Jim isn't quite himself. It's so like him to attempt to pull off something as audacious as sneaking out of the hospital, though, when he only *thinks* he's recovered enough, and that McCoy was able to sympathize with him after all that was rather unexpected, yet touching at the same time. These were my favorite lines of the chapter. I especially love the part where McCoy calls Jim *his* idiot. :o) :
(("So sorry... Bones. You... y’were right. I... was an idiot.”
A tight, watery sob tried to work its way through Leonard’s throat, but he swallowed it back. “You’re always an idiot, Jim, but you’re my idiot. It’s okay, kid. Try to relax. You don’t have to apologize. Just breathe, and help will be here in a minute.”))
If i felt sorry for Jim before, i now find this new turn in events rather depressing. I hope things can only look up from here, or, if it's still in the cards for Jim to hit rock bottom before things get better, that he have a proper emotional breakdown in the process. Goodness knows he needs it.
Great job! :)
| Warrior717 chapter 6 . 7/8/2014
The scene where McCoy kicked the officers out of Jim's room was awesome! Toland was great in this chapter too, and i have a growing respect for her the more she's involved.
Jim's thoughts of whether he would ever have to work closely with a Vulcan were pretty funny, and I love the irony behind it.
Great chapter! :)
| Warrior717 chapter 5 . 7/8/2014
My, this chapter was very engaging! I felt Jim's paranoia and uncertainty, and i loved the suspense we got of not knowing if another attempt would be made on Jim's life once McCoy left. I found the scenes of Jim's treatment with Dr. Livingston a bit eerie at times, and i wondered briefly if he was part of the conspiracy. After some careful thought however, I want to believe that Dr. Livingston is genuinely a good guy, even if he annoys Jim a bit.
Part of me would have liked for McCoy to tell Jim what he and Scotty are up to in order to reassure him, but then that would have affected canon, and McCoy wants Jim to solely focus on his recovery right now anyways.
Still, it's sad to see Jim feeling so vulnerable and scared right now when he's usually much more confident, at least on the outside. This shuttle crash really messed with him. Even though his clinginess to McCoy is very sweet, it's also a bit pitiful, and I find myself feeling sorry for Jim.
I'm really looking forward to seeing where this goes, you're doing a marvelous job with this story :)