Reviews for First Loser
Mrs-N-Uzumaki chapter 1 . 1/11/2017
Awww poor Max! This was so heartbreaking. It's understandable how he feels, being the third kid. i think it's why his mother dotes on him a little more, because no one else would.
Lalala chapter 1 . 3/21/2016
Some how this got me maybe because I grew up with these characters but this made me cry
Fanficlove23 chapter 1 . 8/15/2014
that's my favorite book my mom would sing it to me too.
Fawkes83 chapter 1 . 5/23/2013
Yes.It.Is chapter 1 . 5/17/2013
I'm almost crying! Beautifully written! Poor Max!
Malica15 chapter 1 . 10/13/2012
Aww, so sweet!
CallYouByYourName chapter 1 . 9/19/2012
Aw... really, *really* good. I love what you did with Max here, and I enjoyed being inside his head more than I can say. We haven't heard enough from Max's perspective in these stories or in Wizards in general, and he's honestly a great character. The way you started him in a maze was particularly effective, I'm not sure if that was intentional or not but it seems like a nice neat metaphor for Max's relationship to his siblings, his magic, his life. And I even enjoyed the melancholy ending you gave him in his mother's arms. Poor Max!

And the phrase "Justin-and-Alex, then Max" is so appropriate it should be canon.

I've made a quick note of my favorite parts below. This was nicely done. More, please.


The maze is long, and complicated, and he can't remember any magic
I'm in a maze!"
until he can't see what's in front of him
yet finds another dead end
Max runs harder than he ever has, but it's not enough.
Third place. Last. Like always
It's always been Justin-and-Alex, then Max.
a typical Max-type answer
not just the "and Max" at the end of their "Justin-and-Alex".
Maybe it was just too much to ask.
And suddenly, he gets it.
Sophia Villo chapter 1 . 9/13/2012
I've been Max. You nailed it on the head, that feeling of being the "and" person. Excuse me while I go curl up under my bed. OH, and then, to top it off, I see the book you referred to, which is the same book my mom read to us when we were little, my family sang that song together at bedtime until past when I went to college. No joke. Why don't you just pull my heartstrings out? Which is as much to say, "WELL DONE". Very, very good. You've got it pathos or ethos, I can never remember... thing down good. :)
nescient chapter 1 . 9/13/2012
I'll admit, I was never particularly invested Max as a character, which is why I never sympathized with the complaints that it wasn't fair that he was the only one who didn't keep his powers. He never seemed to put in as much energy using or studying magic as his siblings, so why would he deserve the same reward? Not to mention, I thought the ending was in keeping with the show's greater focus on Alex and Justin. I could understand that the situation might be difficult for Max, I just couldn't see why that meant he should be given powers too. I think you did a great job here of showing how difficult the loss would be for him, without outright claiming he was robbed of anything. I really like the moment at the end with his mother and the nuanced portrayal of Max's feelings.

Also, I thought it was mi hijo (my son), but when spoken the words blend together to come out "mijo." Hardly anyone in fandom spells it with two words, but it's been bugging me for a while, so I finally broke down just now to look it up. Apparently, the original form is mi hijo/hija, but it can be slangily written mijo/mija, but in that context it's used more between friends/SOs than your kids. Which wasn't really the definitive answer I was hoping for. Make of it what you will.
ficdirectory chapter 1 . 9/11/2012
I really love this. Your insight into Max is fantastic. I loved particularly the transition from -"I get the sub shop? That's awesome!"- To the next line: -So fake.- because it's so true. Also, for future reference, the Spanish term of endearment you're looking for is mijo. :) I really love this and look forward to any and all Max stories you write!
88Keys chapter 1 . 9/9/2012
I love this! Well-written and insightful, and the ending was really beautiful. Thanks for sharing!
tuxer chapter 1 . 9/9/2012
so cute. I know that Max was never really good at magic but it's not fair that only Alex and Justin got to keep their powers.
rukkyt chapter 1 . 9/8/2012
fantastic chapter i hope ur going to extend it it would make a really good story