Reviews for A Very Different Harry Potter Tale
noylj chapter 3 . 7/10
Good night, John Boy...
Potterformers chapter 8 . 5/5
This is a good story, but bashing a girl for being a bookworm is very harsh and unfair? due to that i can not approve of the Mione bashing.
Guest chapter 1 . 3/25
Story full of confusions. Couldn't finish it.
daisycb chapter 1 . 3/24
Why did the ministry have to check on Harry's guardians as it was his godfather and in his parents will? I could see it if his guardians were foster parents and strangers and if it was ministry policy to check on all children placed with foster parents but Sirius is not.
MageVicky chapter 16 . 3/24
well, at least you did one good thing in not forcing harry to compete. a lot of stories where harry actually has a competent guardian still force harry to compete even though he's underage. it never made sense to me, so good job there! i really liked it!
MageVicky chapter 15 . 3/24
one thing about ron, putting him on probation implies he's actually been punished before, like with suspension, and that he promised to behave if he was allowed to return. but in this story, ron comes off as a retard because he keeps doing the exact same things every single class, and the teachers also come off as retards for allowing him to keep doing the exact same things every single class. sounds like he never got punished enough. aaaand you even allowed him to punch ginny twice and basically get away with it. he should have been expelled already, regardless of what arthur wants.
MageVicky chapter 14 . 3/24
if Lucius was in askaban all this time, how did he disinherit draco? i know this story is already complete, but you should remember to plan ahead when you're writing stories, and to remember what you already wrote so you don't make a mess of it. like you did with the compulsion and now the draco thing. (no offense, lol, just friendly suggestions, because I read a lot)
MageVicky chapter 9 . 3/24
Ah, I get it now. you jumped the shark last chapter, and accidentally wrote something that belonged to a future chapter, so that's why you wrote the compulsion line last chapter instead of a future on. you got excited about it, lol, i can understand that. (but you should try to edit it out, so as to not confuse future readers further.) it's easy, just upload the same chapter, but without that line, and then in the list of chapters for your story, find chapter 8, and you just hit "replace", and you chose the fixed chapter. easy.
MageVicky chapter 8 . 3/24
the sentence about harry, neville and draco "still" feeling a compulsion to look behind the door with the dog totally confuses me completely, i totally missed the part where you already wrote that they felt a compulsion hit them, and that they visited the 3rd floor and saw the dog...when the heck did that happen? also, you wrote nothing about draco before except that he got sorted to he even friends with neville? because I don't remember you mentioning anything about that before, either...
Guest chapter 1 . 2/27
To justify Dumbledore bashing, you don't need to read further then where Dumbledore placed Harry at the Dursleys' door. If he thought it would be a good place for Harry, he would have had the decency to talk to them in person. He would also have seen they didn't want Harry, just in case he didn't already know. Actually, he knew, as he admitted in later books, and that is the reason he didn't talk to them. Add that he said he wouldn't remove the scar even if he could, and it was later revealed to be a Horcrux.
The most logical reason for Dumbledore's behavior is that he wanted Harry to suffer, to have no self worth, and to walk willingly to his death.
ayeletsita chapter 22 . 1/28
I found myself rereading this fic after finding it again and I felt obligated to leave a comment.
I'll admit, I'm kind of addicted to Dumbledore-bashing stories and while Molly and Ron bashing is usually not my favorite it's easy to explain to myself that those are different people that only happend to share the same name. In other words, I liked the general idea.
However, you mostly told us in the story what happens instead of showing us and not just in the descriptions. It felt to me as if instead of writing people's actually words you wrote to bottom line of it. For example, Draco asking for help from Sirius, Arthur and Remus. Draco should be way more careful with his word and would hestiate much more as a child and as a Malfoy specifically. Try using more slang and day-to-day words in conversations. Perhaps some "eh..."s.
In addition, I had trouble feeling as if the characters you write about were the same characters I know. Harry was a bit too perfect, Sirius and Remus were barely shown with an actual character, I won't mention Dumbledore, Molly and Ron who are obviously OOCs but you should try and think about it the next time you write a fanfic. Give Harry more Quiditch time, let him be a bit lazy, let Neville talk about Herbiology (I have a feeling I misspled it. Nevermind, you know what I mean) and so on.
Aside from that it had potencial, you should write about emotions more, and not just what happens (and not just say "X was angry\ sad\ upsate". Try describing their respose, did they sulk around? Maybe they tried to hide their tears? Were their studied affected? Maybe their grades dropped, maybe they invested themself in their classwork and became top of the class. Just think about it and it'll come).
Anyway, this is essentially a good fanfic (although there are some major flaws in it) and I think that if you'd try and reread it yourself, and fix some thing, it could be great.
Miss Millie chapter 22 . 12/5/2015
Good story to read and reread. I hope you don't mind if I add it to my colections of H&G stories I'm colections for my grand daughters.
Thanks for the ride.
Miss Millie
Purplezebraprincess chapter 17 . 11/4/2015
You contradict yourself in chapter 17 during the dream sequence since you stated in early chapters that Severus was given the kiss and along with the other escaped death eaters except for pettigrew. Not to mention it was also in the newspaper. I'm not being rude I greatly enjoy your story plot except for this confusion.
GunsFallSilent chapter 9 . 10/24/2015
Rude!Stupid!OOC!Hermione? If you're going to bash someone, it's best to do it for canon reasons until later on. Just sayin'.
GunsFallSilent chapter 7 . 10/23/2015
RON IS NOT THAT STUPID! Also, TWENTY POINTS for 'chivalry'? Favouritism!
301 | Page 1 2 3 4 11 .. Last Next »