|Reviews for The shadow walker's resolve|
| AKAAkira chapter 1 . 9/13/2012
Eeh, my opinion is that first, this piece needs to be broken into paragraphs.
Second, Elatha could have lingered far more on his sentimental feelings. That middle part was good on that - the "Do I rush because I am concerned for my friends? Do I even consider those peoples my friends?" part. But the other parts like his trip to Iria, his walk through Tara, nothing about his own thoughts and opinions comes up, which seems to defeat the aim of this whole story.
And third, you didn't need the explanations - the bits about Milletians and shadow Tara. Most people reading this would know it, and even if you still wanted them there was way better way to integrate them than to stop the story to explain them. For example, instead of:
"...the only survivor shall be the lone Milletian who is fighting alongside the Tuatha de Dananns for whenever a Milletian dies he or she is always revived without fail."
You can have:
"...the only survivor being the lone, immortal Milletian who is fighting alongside the Tuatha de Dananns."
And that summarizes that whole clause into one word. You don't need the details if this story's about Elatha.
| Star Dust chapter 1 . 9/9/2012
I loved it 333 Continue please :'D