Reviews for velvet sheets and cancerous smoke
TheAnnoyingVoice chapter 1 . 11/25/2012
Morbid. Tragic. Sad. Morbid. But it's beautifully written and contains the harsh realities of life. It made me tear up a little, but despite how sad it is, I enjoyed it a lot. I actually don't know which is sadder, Vanitas having cancer, or Ventus's detachement from him. It doesn't seem like something he would do, but on the other hand, it does. I don't know how to explain it. Either way, it was very fitting. Out of all of it though, I would have to say I loved the ending the most. It's horribly sad, but it gives me a sense of relief, as though I can feel closure like how Ventus does. It's bittersweet. But there's just so much emotion in that one part, despite all of Vanitas's thoughts and words throughout the story. It's the end that gets to me every time I read it.

Amazing work, my dear friend. And may you continue to write amazing work and know that I support it all the way. :)
writetheorange chapter 1 . 10/5/2012
;') Oh gosh, I don't know what to say.

I loved every last bit, every last drop that story gave to me. Gah, I don't know what to say. You must know how truly amazing that was. You know what makes it even more emotional is that my sister sent that to me, and lol minus the incest, I thought of her and my relationship. And I could imagine what it means to lose someone in your life. From your story. Do you know how powerful that is?

I'm so overwhelmed with emotion, I don't want to leave a review just blabbering I almost feel like I should write a true review in the morning. But I'm happy these feelings can accompany me, and it seems more proper to leave a review after I've got the last breath of a story.

Okay, starting off, I was true in assuming Vanitas was the main character, just had a feeling, though it quickly turned to Ventus. I wrestled with the thought for a long time and interestingly ended with Ventus. I don't think it matters really who was who, because the reader can perceive it as whoever they deem fit. It was thrilling to read it as Ventus, and I can't wait to re-read it as Vanitas.
I loved the way you made the characters. I loved their views, their spite, their thoughts, their whole damn dialogue. Ventus (who I almost feel inclined to refer to as Vanitas) gave away the impression that he was a bit emotionally unstable. You could hear it in his voice when he speaks with Vanitas. How he depends on him, almost worships him. I don't know if you had hoped to give that impression, but I definitely felt it. The way he listens intently to his brother when he speaks, allowing him to cut him off and the way he pushed him off the cliff you could feel to the core, that something was off.
I love how strong of a character Vanitas is. He's suffering from physical, but more terrible emotional conflict. The way he deals with it all was so reasonable. And in the beginning he feels so justified that Ventus should pay. His love-so relentless is so struggled within himself the reader can suffer seeing it happen. But you built him tough, so solid like a brick wall. So real and finished that he almost seemed tangible. I really wondered what he felt in the hospital, if he loved his girlfriend more or his brother because she wasn't really explained. I just know he loved them both.
D; The scene where he passes was so well put together. You know it really made me think about a person, a soul leaving and the people left there standing and feeling in their hearts that they'll love them forever even if they're gone.
Your writing style was fantastic. You stuck true to the story, creating a demented, and psychological blanket. By the end it kind of sounds like Vanitas was a ghost, reliving the whole experience by watching Ventus. That was just my opinion. I'm sure a lot of people will have different for this story.
I can't say enough about this story. Though it'll be in my favs, I still seriously want to get in your head and find out exactly how you made it. What you were thinking? How you were thinking. Lol now there's not so much to say.
When I started this story I thought it was going to be depressing all the way through but really by the ending I was uplifted. Thank you.
It was such a pleasure to read. Please keep writing.

-Kelsie
youngwriter123 chapter 1 . 10/2/2012
OMFG, I just had to leave a review for this. Amazingly angsty but amazing story. I was so engrossed with this story that I kept hoping nobody would bother me until I finished it XD
I love stories like these, even though they are depressing as heck! Your writing was superb, your stanza-interesting and beautiful as hell, and your dialogue was great. This was a tiny piece of art and I'm so glad that I found it. It made my night :D
I also love how you seemed to really get into the characters. . I knew it was Vanitas in the hospital, Ventus sure sounded like himself and I'm glad I was right! What an epicly sad story that I'm so glad I found.
-youngwriter123
Into-The-Dark-rutu14 chapter 1 . 9/17/2012
This was really well written and I enjoyed the style. I'm not usually the one to cry during movies or stories, but there was something about your story and writings style that made me cry. This story triggered quite a few emotions in me while I read. I'm so glad that I took the time to read this. Thank you for writing such a tremendous piece of work.
Moenitas chapter 1 . 9/15/2012
;_; i'm still sad for this story. I can't overcome it xD! I love it, it's beautiful ; 7 ; and so fucking sad, i love how you wrote this story ;w; goes to my favorites. I couldnt say who was how until ventus ran away xDDD;; OMG BABY COWARD. But awwee, i really loved how you wrote it the first time, it's a shame that isnt allow it ;; (as for lyrics, i have see a lot of them and i never see someone complaning. Well, i dunno exactly how it works this page xD) hope to see more from you dear ;w;!
XaccemFlare chapter 1 . 9/14/2012
A very grim story between Vanitas and Ventus as brothers. I have to say, trying to figure out who was narrating was difficult until the cowardice. I assume it was more of Ventus style to back off more.

To have Ventus be the sole cause of him dying was truly tragic. He just wanted his brother. Mournful for Ventus, and the aftermath of Vanitas death. Does he still feel empty now without Vanitas?

Your story evoke many emotions throughout the plot. Great job for writing this. Fav and following you. Cheers.
OmniaVanitas chapter 1 . 9/12/2012
what a sad story...but so beautifully written ;_;
thank you for sharing this great piece. indeed love it.
Hito me Bore chapter 1 . 9/11/2012
It is against the rules to post the lyrics to songs not in the public domain. It is also against the rules to post stories written in second person. Please fix these violations, or you will be reported. It’s nothing personal, but everyone needs to follow the rules.

Thank you.