|Reviews for Beyond an Heiress' Purpose|
| Ramrikai chapter 36 . 3/24
Just ... Wow.
I'm actually very glad you didn't include a lemon here. You conveyed their deep, deep love very well without it, and the touches of suggestion you left were enough to portray their desire for one another. I feel that a lemon scene would have tarnished it with unneeded lust, like adding too much salt to a batch of cookie dough. You need a little bit to fully bring out the flavor, but too much spoils the batch. Similarly their love in this story needs a touch of lust or it would feel young and immature, but too much and the vibrant glow it dimmed and tinted. There are times for lemons, but that was not one of them. You did very well.
This whole story was fantastic. I bounced over here when I saw it recommended in New Chance. I didn't review until now because I simply couldn't stop reading.
After it's all said and done, I have but one complaint: the final pairing was spoiled. Part of it isn't really your fault as you should provide an accurate listing for readers' search purposes, but you also gave away the pairing in your author notes. I will admit that I would likely have either spoiled it for myself or not even read this story as SasuHina is an abomination in my eyes. However, for more patient and tolerant readers, the spoiling of the final pairing removes a significant amount of suspense of who she will end up with. In addition to this, the fact that any pairing with Hinata was spoiled at all means that her "death" shouldn't have fooled anyone.
Regardless, this was still an amazing story with one of the happiest endings I've seen in a long while. Granted I haven't read a completed fic in a while either, but still. Awesome.
P.S. The play on Hinata's name with "Tsuki" was very clever. I'm sure that anyone else who knew the meaning of her name enjoyed that as well.
| August Smith chapter 18 . 11/18/2014
Skim so hard mofos wanna fine me! *dat shit cray...aint it dre?* SKIM SKIM SO HARD!...I can see a chapter or two of filler but...if the majority of the story isn't romance then please don't tag it as romance. I wanted to see some love here and all I've gotten thus far is angst...if the WHOLE story is Hinata getting her memory back so she can finally be with Naruto at the VERY end you should not tag the story as romance, its misleading and cruel :(
| August Smith chapter 15 . 11/18/2014
Too much text regarding memory loss and random extra plot stuff...our main characters have barely interacted yet the story still revolves around them? I don't normally like to skim reading but I have a feeling I'm gonna be doing a lot of it :(
| August Smith chapter 13 . 11/18/2014
I really like the story so far but...not nearly enough Naruto/Hinata/Sasuke development to justify their actions IMO. Its still a really good story, I just think that for the characters to feel so strongly about each other that there should have been more development between them. Like real dates and actual hangouts rather than just some weird obsessions and life-saving occurrences.
| August Smith chapter 9 . 11/18/2014
If you keep up the angst much longer the romance/supernatural tag you put on the story will be total BS :P Other than that the story is well written and cool. I hope we get some actual romance soon. You have quite a long story and I'm surprised to see so few follows/reviews. I know its just a T rating which sucks, but still...I'll keep going though and I hope that my instincts aren't mistaken!
| August Smith chapter 6 . 11/18/2014
If the WHOLE story is based on this "rivalry" between Sasuke and Naruto for the affections of Hinata then you should put that somewhere in the notes of the story lolz. I don't mind some initial tension but...if it lasts more than 150-200k words, then all I have to say is WTFBOOM!
| August Smith chapter 4 . 11/18/2014
You have gotten much praise from the authors of this site...Your writing style is very fluid, however I'm not impressed with the content thus far. That doesn't mean I think its bad at all, in fact its pretty adequate. I believe it could have been made better however by an initial interaction between Hinata and Naruto other than what she saw in the fight. She's already healing and directly interacting with Sasuke (who I'm assuming is the negative lad in her life, however if I fell for the troll and this is really a SasuHina story then bravo!) but we are already moving on past the chuniin exams with basically no interaction between Naruto and Hinata thus far? I know theres a lot to go and this review is basically dust in the wind but I really do like the style and hope to be entertained later on.
| Anisax chapter 36 . 11/10/2014
Woow ... This story was so amazing! I couldn't wait for the next evening to read the following chapters. All these ups and downs throughout the story were thrilling. There was no way to not be affected by the drama taking place in Naruto's and Hinata's life.
Thank you very much for all your hard work and I hope to read another amazing story from you soon! :)
| anauzumaki999 chapter 36 . 9/12/2014
i loved your story ... well done
| Wondering Knight chapter 15 . 8/20/2014
So far it's really good and sad. I like the way you made Sasuke love her for selfish reasons and Naruto love her for selfless reasons. Sasuke never seems like the type to actually care for someone other than what they can offer his clan and you showed that with Sasuke. He doesn't really love her, but he loves the thought if her rebuilding his clan.
| Give praise to The Holy Log chapter 21 . 7/31/2014
I hope Naruto ends up killing Sasuke over Hinata. I really hope it leads to that.
| Give praise to The Holy Log chapter 8 . 7/30/2014
I really really do not like how this is going... I want NaruHina. I hope THAT happens soon. Sasuke is killing this for me already. But I will stay with it and give it a chance...
| ramenreed chapter 36 . 7/3/2014
I loved your story it was beautiful. This story is the type of story that should be made into a movie. The plot was fantastic and the suspense was killing me. I definitely recommend this for anyone who loves naruhina and maybe sasuhina. Excellent job. Favorited the story.
| Sunrise moon 2 chapter 3 . 6/28/2014
I'm intrigued by this story, I like it so far.
And it's all thanks to Serious Sam for having a recommendation at the end of the chapter of his story My Precious People.
| mereviewing chapter 36 . 6/24/2014
Second time finish reading this story!
Still a great story.
Although, I not particularly fond of Naruto to use the Namikaze name instead of to me it is just like he a different person all of sudden.
The reason is he's always refer himself as "Uzumaki Naruto the future Hokage" from his childhood.
But that just my opinion.
I would like to thank you so much for sharing and creating this the best!