|Reviews for Stargate Effect|
| coolas2 chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
Another good read. Would the tauri not add asgard weapons on to the auroras? or at least something on the lines of those satellite weapons in season 1 of sga
| ferduran chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
interesting chap, but why the SG people didnt just beam a nucle inside thei enemy ships and after this will the Aurora class ship be update to also have energy weapons?
| Major Simi chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
alright interesting development, but why did you have to let the 304 be destroied so fast and also don't the 304 cary nukes, of which only one should deals some real damage or even take out a citadel ship as the kinetic bariers don't block radiation or heat like shields do, anyway interesting chapter but a bit short also the fight was a bit lame, but otherwise good
| apocalyps24 chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
really liking the story so far D can wait for more
| edboy4926 chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
| James chapter 4 . 10/1/2012
This is awesome, I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
| WildCard-Yes Man chapter 4 . 9/29/2012
MMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRR RRRRRR
| Reikson chapter 4 . 9/28/2012
Hic Qua Videeum is apparently Ancient for "here lies our legacy"
Are you seriously going to name a planet "here lies our legacy"?
If anything, just call it "Videeum" (Legacy) and leave it at that.
| MetalKing1417 chapter 4 . 9/28/2012
I wonder how the Reapers will react to a species from outside their galaxy.
| edboy4926 chapter 4 . 9/28/2012
| ferduran chapter 4 . 9/28/2012
Now the SG people looks more adult, Just a Question if Hic Qua Videeum is a fortress planet then what will the citadel do even if the SG have few ships on the are, because the defences on the planet would be able to destroy a great deal of their ships.
| coolas2 chapter 3 . 9/27/2012
This is awesome please continue. Resurgence of Thor and the Asgard?
| DN7 chapter 1 . 9/27/2012
Ok first off I'm glad you decided to do a SG/ME fic, there aren't enough of them in my opinion. Sadly though you need some work done on this. I'll go through what you have so far for constructive criticism, so don't take anything I post from here on out as anything but.
- Your beginning time line could use some work. Check out this link for an acceptable timeline, then work your story around that (take out the spaces) www .gateworld wiki/Timeline
That should give you a better grounding for your story which leads me to my next point.
- The Lucian Alliance as far as it is known does not have a singular homeworld, rather its a group of human warlords that managed to get their hands on a number of Goauld vessels that decided to band together to make even more money through the selling of Kassa and other less moral means. So really it would be hard to completely take out a group like that, because even if the SGC/Tau'ri did, another could and most likely would pop up somewhere else. That also should play into you having the SGC have more bases for a cushion come disclosure.
- I understand the temptation of having Earths tech advance quickly thanks to the Ancient data base, but there is a huge difference between being able to reproduce some tech (as shown by the quick refits of the 304 fleet after Odyssey received its Asgard upgrades) or work it compared to being able to completely understand it from the ground up and being able to reproduce it on their own. It would be akin to giving an avid Real Time Strategy game player command of an actual army. They know the basics, but wouldn't last long. There is also the issue of balance. I don't mind stomp-fics, but they have to be decently done. If you give the Tau'ri everything they could possibly want right away in your fic, you'll lose what made the series so good: the SGC's ability to pull out of a nearly impossible situation with little to no resources on the winning side.
- We already know they operate at least three bases: Alpha, Gamma (from Season 9 Ep 17: The Scourge), and Icarus (destroyed by the Lucian Alliance in SG:U). Considering the use of primarily NATO naming conventions we could then deduce that prior to Icarus, the SGC operated at least seven bases (Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, Delta, Echo, Foxtrot, Golf/Gamma). So while this really is conjecture, its not without basis.
- The building of your fleet would be an incredible challenge, considering that it takes a year for a 304 to be completed. While we don't know their construction methods, we do know that they have to mine the naquadah and trinium for the hulls (which btw can't be found on Earth and hence wouldn't really detract from its resources), and to gather that much would require a huge effort in manpower and resources, which I'd be surprised to see the IOA allow that (due to usual power grabbing). Which brings me to my next point.
- With Atlantis on Earth, the IOA (in particular China) would push for even more disclosure or civilian operations since the US military has near total control of Atlantis (which is a freaking submersible-space-flight-capable city that has who knows how many drones to use as potential weapons) and the SGC's gate, both of which are IN the US.
- While the modified Asgard beaming technology can be a way out for construction, that has to have a balance to it. For example, the heavier the elements or the more complex the object that is being created, the more energy required (which is technically a law of physics, keep reading and you'll see). We know that they have access to some power from ZPM's and the schematics for creating them are likely in the database, it is again one of those things were we know how they work and can use them but don't understand how to make them. Einsteins Emc2 should point out exactly how much energy would be needed to create the mass for a single 304.
- 5 Atlantis class city ships in a little over 10 years? Really? That is quite simply OP. You might as well just create an entire Tau'ri version of the Citadel with weapons to match if you are going to do this. As far as the other specs for the ships, a simple google search will give some decent results for ships like the Aurora. Someone will always complain about the sizes and whatnot, but then at least the readers have something solid to grasp onto. Also, a Ha'Tak is really nothing but moving targets compared to a 304 with the Asgard upgrades, so really the Tau'ri would be better off either using them for raw materials or loaning them to the Free Jaffa, which brings me to my next point.
- I don't see a mention of the Earths relationship with the Jaffa. They can be a major player if you do it correctly as either friend or foe. Also, who would want to leave Tealc, Ryac and Bratac out in the cold?
- For your encrypted 8 chevron address there are somethings you need to consider. One being the Ancients left the Milky Way for Pegasus due to the plague, leaving those behind to die, but not before they reseeded life in the galaxy. As far as canon is concerned, they then stayed in Pegasus until they were forced out by the Wraith (see the time line I posted about earlier), so I doubt they had time to try and build a new civilization in Andromeda in the 100 or so years they were at war with the Wraith. So either the group who built your Ancient battle station is an offshoot of the Ancients, or a completely different race (this could be a good spot for the Furlings to have come from, as they are mentioned only two or three times in all of stargate). Also, we know it takes a massive amount of power to run a shield (from the SG1 season 10 episode 13: The Road Not Taken we learn it takes 700 Giggawatts to power Arthur's Mantle/Merlins phase shift device to encompass all of Earth), then not to mention weapons, so again your fortress is encroaching on the OP area as it begs the question, if the race who built it were so paranoid, why aren't they around and why is the place still intact but completely abandoned.
Now that was just for that small section of your stories first chapter. At first glace of the actual story, I can say you need line breaks like mad. You also have too much dialog which can be seen just by looking at the left most side of the paragraphs. Too much dialog is something that every beginning writer struggles with, myself included, so that's to be expected.
I'm just going to end my review here as I'm sure you have enough to worry about with what I already have. If you haven't already, look at the other SG/ME fics to get a better idea of what works and what doesn't. Before you ask, my own SG/ME fic is undergoing rewriting/planning and what I would consider only an average example. If you want really good SG fics, Chris7221 is imho the best there is.
| edboy4926 chapter 3 . 9/27/2012
Keep on going.
| MetalKing1417 chapter 3 . 9/27/2012
Ha ha, that terminus member is sure seeing things "from a certain point of veiw".