|Reviews for Interloper 2: The Collector Crisis|
| V-rcingetorix chapter 51 . 9/14
And the #50 cliffy is avenged, many thanks :)
| Sorlian chapter 51 . 9/14
Well, that went south quickly. Always remember to bring excessive clips! But yeah, was expecting them to have to make their own exit, considering the numbers being thrown at them. My only question is, will he continue to let EDI drive? And a very diverse bunch they have so far; Human Asari, Turian, AI, Salarian. So, what is next? Quarian, Volus, Batarian, Krogan, Drell, or Elcor? Perhaps something even more exotic! So many choices! Though it feels like they might want or need someone with some heavy combat experience, maybe crowd control of some sort, so they don't get overrun so badly.
| Sorlian chapter 50 . 8/30
Hmm, hopefully he faked his death and isn't some sort of husk (or the Salarian equivalent). I was also thinking Kai Leng with the sword, or Cerberus Phantoms in general. Interesting to see chemical propelled slugs being used, but makes sense for smugglers with everything being mass effect based now. Looking forward to more from the 'second' team!
| V-rcingetorix chapter 50 . 8/29
Cliffie, but goodie. The descriptions were well done; I practically smelled the approach. Very well done!
| 1529 chapter 49 . 6/30
A very good story. The mental break started what I think was a massive weak point in the storyline where things became odd, but I believe that this last chapter has begun to straighten the story back out.
The combination of the story of Michael's physical, mental and emotional self was taken too far, I believe. Physically there was reason and logic, but to also have the character regress so far both mentally and emotionally? A couple of steps too far.
I'm glad that portion of the story seems to be over... it was a bit difficult to read.
Thanks for writing.
| ExS-DrIfTeRr chapter 49 . 3/13
I dont get it in what way has he messed up?
| V-rcingetorix chapter 49 . 3/12
It looks like you took your time with it, and from the opinion of someone that exists outside your skull, it's not bad. That's my main complaint about my own writing; I have to stop and wait a few days or a week before I can look at it objectively, and even then there's problems. So again, from someone out here, it's good.
Pacing good. You didn't just spill Michael's mind into Liara's head at first opportunity; it's taken a whole FORTY-NINE chapters! To quote Garrus: Impressive!
The explanation behind the encrypted Shadow Broker files, unlike canon, is a good one. Logical. That alone deserves accolades; too many people ignore logic these days. Making SB paranoid about Cerberus is a good move, and having EDI move to Liara's vessel was equally logical. Why would a huge program like that remain cooped up in a armor suit?
Frankly, the timing on this is fantastic. This one point helps propel the story forwards, just as it pulled it from the beginning. How will Liara react and/or help (or not)? She was eager to get inside Michael's head before, will she be thinking twice now?
As a culmination for all the secrets, the various lies that even Tali sees through now, now it's just getting interesting ;)
For improvements ... I'd work a little more on the descriptors. For example, that last paragraph; was her hand soft, or calloused from warfare? Did EDI's voice have a soprano quality, or does it remain a mellow alto? Do the deck plates shake when the engines give more thrust, or does it remain eerily silent?
Too much description ruins a tale, but not enough can have a similar effect. You're on a good medium here, but my opinion is that more would be better. But, like a pretzel, my opinion is better when taken with a grain of salt.
Keep up the good work!
| general-joseph-dickson chapter 49 . 3/10
| Sorlian chapter 49 . 3/9
Hmm, wonder how well she'll take it, one thing for the benefit of the doubt, another to see the reality as another believes it. Also timelines and spreadsheets! GO! Also interesting to see where Shepard is going, since things are different. Kind of wonder what happened with Tali and the Migrant fleet as well!
| Toothless is best chapter 49 . 3/9
meh. i read worse stuff than this.
| Tactus501st chapter 49 . 3/8
Great chapter my friend really good stuff new things are gonna happen now liara know everything
| Goku12345654 chapter 49 . 3/8
Wow he finally told her. Hopefully with someone to lean on, he won't lose it again anytime soon.
| Toothless is best chapter 48 . 3/3
DUN DUN DUUUUUUNNN
| general-joseph-dickson chapter 51 . 1/27
| TheRangerBoy chapter 2 . 12/9/2015
WHY... WHY CARVER! D'':