|Reviews for One Weekend|
| NickyFox13 chapter 1 . 11/19/2012
I like your writing style-it's sparse but detailed and engrossing at the same time. Near the beginning, I got a little lost with all of the dialogue but the more I read the more I got used to it and even enjoy the dialogue heavy story. I greatly enjoy this fanfiction and I'm excited to read more :)
| hillbythetree chapter 2 . 10/18/2012
Ships ALL THE SHIPS!
I enjoyed the flow of events in this story, how it was cohesive and all occurred at the about the same time. Not to say that having a story jump around is bad, but in this case it was very easy to follow.
I feel so bad for Freddie, my poor baby Freddie boo (I know I didn't really create him, but BABY BOO). He needs to sort himself out. Freddie, please.
I did sort of doubt that Connor would be swayed by Steve's advances, especially since he's been married to Kevin for so long. I like the dynamic between the couples, though! Eric is the best character. He's witty, he's goofy, it's just... ugh. Yes. Baby.
You used a lot of real-time description, which is good, but try breaking it up with some exposition. Too much exposition can be annoying or distracting, but everything in moderation, eh? I liked the conversations, but they would be easier to follow if you reminded us who was speaking once in a while. Most are fine, but be sure to clearly establish the speaker before dropping the "Freddie said" and "James sighed" and so forth.
All in all, I think this story is only going up! New chapter, eh?
| TheMadMatador chapter 1 . 9/29/2012
Loved the multi-layer story telling. Hopefully this will see some continuation, hm?