Reviews for Metal Heart
Xenogamer chapter 1 . 4/29/2013
I love the way you show Mumkhar's emotions at that time. Great story!
The Exile chapter 1 . 12/16/2012
Excellent insight into Mumkhar's mind.
TenshiNoAkuma chapter 1 . 11/17/2012
Fantastic story! The use of second person is a really interesting narrative choice; it really gives a sense of both detachment and personal investment to the events. Detachment because it's like Mumkhar is an outsider watching his own actions, but there's a sense of personal investment because the story is directly talking to YOU.

You've got a really solid take on why Mumkhar ended up the way he did, building on what canon's already given us. I really like your explanation of why Mumkhar didn't say anything to the party during the raid on Colony 9 (even though his gestures are still very expressive and trolly) despite the fact he's REALLY chatty every time you meet him afterwards. It's pretty much my new headcanon now haha.

Great story, and I hope to see more from you!
Sylvera chapter 1 . 10/13/2012
I'm impressed. You did a good job getting into Mumkhar's head - which is impressive, considering how he's not that deep a character. Nice job with this.
Nicola chapter 1 . 10/12/2012
It's amazing how possibly easy it could be to relate-we've all experienced the pang of jealousy at some point, and if we dealt with it slightly differently, who knows? It could have more than easily sent us down a path similar to Mumkhar's...Scary, huh?
How we deal with these as an individual defines us. :)
Anyway, insightful. I liked it!
Sniperrolf chapter 1 . 10/1/2012
Hm, I've never been one for second person, and yet you made it work very well. this is the best I've seen it done on fanfiction.
It was interesting to see what Mumkhar was thinking at this time, and it was very in character. (not that you didn't guess I'd say that.)
great story. :)