|Reviews for The Guilt That Eats|
| Free as the Birds chapter 1 . 2/24
This was a nice little story. You just need to make a new paragraph for each of the dialogues and fix the grammar mistakes.
| TrisakAminawn chapter 1 . 9/3/2013
I think this was fairly cute. Dick certainly did need to reconnect with Tim, and Tim is very good at taking shit. Jason giving the push is pretty humiliating for a nurturer like Dick. So yes, it was a cute fic.
It was also almost totally unreadable.
This is a rule: Every time a new person starts speaking, that's a new paragraph. The dialogue doesn't have to be the first thing *in* the paragraph, but Tim talking cannot be in the same paragraph as Dick talking, and the same goes for Jason. Ever. If this rule is ignored, conversation is hard to follow, and trying to do so is unpleasant. Once Jason appeared, this fic became a chore to slog through. The scene with Tim was even worse.
Your grammar also deteriorated the closer you got to the end. Your verbs are inconsistent as to tense and person. But the dialogue walls are the real problem.
| dragonprincess1988 chapter 1 . 12/15/2012
This was a very nice story. Just remember every time a new person speaks to start a new paragraph.
| Enigmatic Conundrum chapter 1 . 12/7/2012
I really liked this story, it's one of the ones I wish would've happened for real and no just on FF.
Also, interesting Fun Fact #427:
There are actually two variations of the name 'Damien', the second is Damian. They also have two different definitions: Damien means "Sweet and Harmless", while Damian literally translates to " Demon Spawn" :)
| Momo Spock chapter 1 . 10/5/2012
Very Sweet story