|Reviews for Of Hel and Earth|
| thehpfan123 chapter 7 . 9/15
Amazing fic! I loved it. Please update soon. :)
| HEART OF THE FLAMING SEA chapter 1 . 8/19
THE ROCK IS PART OF THE BIFROST ISN'T IT?!
| guest chapter 1 . 8/12
I'll try to be honest with you. I was a bit wary about reading an incomplete fic that hadn't been updated in so long, so it really didn't take much for me to decide not to go past chapter 1. The reason I won't be continuing is the...somewhat forced exposition. It just seems endless. You give an abbreviated summary (not a real summary, just jumped around pieces of one), then a solid scene (with the death eaters), then go back to summarizing again. You cram so much information into the summary that I lost all interest in it. You didn't give (me) an emotional connection to the characters (talking about sad events isn't enough to make readers feel sad).
Honestly, work on dialog. Instead of saying, 'the time Hermione asked why he had a tattoo' ACTUALLY have Hermione ask about the tattoo. It makes things less clunky. Instead of summaries, try snapshot scenes with page breaks to mark scene change/timeskips.
I would also recommend changing your tense usage somewhat. 'Neville had been dueling', 'trying to give evidence without implying he had only seen' 'It had happened' -wherever possible, you should strive for consistency with tenses, but also strive not to make things unnecessarily wordy. Changed to more like, 'Neville was dueling(or Neville dueled a death eater)', 'he only saw' or 'It happened'. I also notice that you use a lot of passive past (you used 'was' five times in one paragraph). Changing some of them to more dynamic verbs would be advisable.
Ultimately, it seems like your story didn't start until the conversation with Luna. You just tried to skip through the background that you wanted to show how epic Harry is becoming without actually writing about it, and just continued skipping through events until you got to what you wanted to write. I would recommend either doing a full summary (remove details of events entirely, i.e. say he got control back over the hollows while fighting death eaters, fell out with his friends, and quit his job to become an unspeakable where he experimented and was thrown into another world) or start in the 'new world' and show flashbacks of how he got their later in smaller pieces so they're more digestible.
I am sorry. You seem to have put a lot of time and thought into this chapter, but I just couldn't get into your story. Good luck with it.
| Donimo4 chapter 7 . 7/16
This fic is great. Hope you return to it some day.
| Gioia chapter 7 . 7/11
Thank you so much for the lovely treat of your story. I love how tangible Harry's emotions are. I swear I was hyperventilating when he did, felt my adrenaline rushing as his did, and was just as annoyed/frightened/victorious as he was during his time in that cell. Should your schedule and muse permit you to return to this story someday, I'll be eagerly awaiting your update. Thank you!
| Guest chapter 7 . 7/10
I always hate reading a wonderful story and it just stops. Please write more!
| RTVfan chapter 7 . 7/1
Hmm. Why is Natasha being so honest with Harry? Because she's trying to recruit him into the Avengers as well?
Nice character building scene with Harry having him play possum in order to gather more information on his new reality. Loved seeing Nick Fury...furious. :P Not that I dislike the character at all, but imagining Samuel L Jackson pissed is freaking scary, and now I'm worried what will come of Harry, haha.
Please update this fic, it was just getting good! You were hitting your stride, and you end mid-stride? Poor form, poor form.
| RTVfan chapter 6 . 7/1
Finally! Some good old Avengers on Wizard action, and you didn't disappoint. Actually, I thought this chapter in particular and near brilliant. You write suspense and action pieces excellently. My pulse was raised throughout this entire chapter so much, I felt like I was watching one of Marvel's movies. All of the characters got their due, including Hawkeye, who some people mock for being comparatively “useless”, but I really like the character, and he was the one to actually capture Harry, so kudos for that.
| RTVfan chapter 5 . 7/1
Very cool seeing that Tony Stark and Bruce Banner can track Harry's magic. This was pretty much just a set up chapter for what comes next I'm guessing, but still, a solid entry.
| RTVfan chapter 4 . 7/1
Oh my gosh, Harry Potter and Captain America ran into each other! This is what crossovers are written for! Squee! Sad that it couldn't have been under better circumstances though. Still, I enjoy Harry's first thoughts on the living legend.
This chapter is very interesting. Love seeing Harry cut off from the Wizarding World and having to rely on his own instincts. It's also interesting to compare and contrast the way he thinks versus the way Captain America thinks and see the differences between what are basically magical soldiers(Aurors) and Muggle soldiers like Steve.
| RTVfan chapter 3 . 7/1
This chapter is sad to read after the events of the Civil War movie where Tony and Steve hate each other now. :(
I wouldn't say that Steve's motto is “If you don't understand it, smash it”. That's more Hulk's thing. :P
Hmm. I wonder if the Bifrost can transport people to parallel universes, than does that mean that Thor/Loki/Odin/Other Asgardians have been to the Potterverse in the past? It's an intriguing thought. Solid chapter, friend.
| RTVfan chapter 2 . 7/1
I KNEW IT! I knew the rock was a piece of the Bifrost. Clever, very clever. I know you've said that you don't read the comics, but something similar to this happened back in the 80s in the Thor comics.
Hmm, interesting twist on the Hallows. I like how you tied them to the Asgardians(Or rather, the Aesir, as that's their proper name). Always nice to see someone like Hela who is so rarely used.
It's really interesting to imagine Harry's body traveling the Bifrost. Why would his soul be damaged but not his body?
| RTVfan chapter 1 . 7/1
You know, at first I wasn't sure if I was going to enjoy this fic. The writing style, where you are telling us the story through a voiceover describing events, at first felt kind of lazy to me, I guess because I've seen other HP/Avengers stories written in the exact same way and they didn't impress me, but this one was different. Your story is intriguing. Almost has a faint hint of H.P Lovecraft for some odd reason, I guess because Harry's working at the Department of Mysteries and that can lead to some potentially scary scenes, but there's also just something about your choice of words that made this chapter make me want to read more and see what happens next.
I like the idea that Luna's strengths would be best suited in research.
Also love the idea that you are expanding on the Department of Mysteries. We never really see any scientific or scientificesque wizards and witches running around in the canon books or movies, and it'd make sense that the Ministry would employ them here. I also like the idea that Harry might potentially be a researcher instead of an Auror.
Have no idea what the rock is, but I'm intrigued to find out. I guess it has something to do with Asgard? IS IT THE BIFROST?
| SmexyBananas chapter 7 . 4/30
Well to be fair, they did capture him and locked him in a cell.
| Mad Library Scientist chapter 7 . 4/24
Great story! I hope you update soon!