|Reviews for Lost and Found|
| Tsukiko chapter 12 . 9/6/2014
As a massive Todd fan, I love it. When you going to do the sequel. Please please please.
| Isolde Jansma chapter 12 . 6/22/2014
There were a few things that caused a real problem with my enjoyment of your story, which is down to bad editing, leaping from point of view (PoV) to PoV so a reader can't tell who's speaking, tense and grammar and spelling. All these things add up to stuff that makes a brain cringe.
An example, speech. It's not good to clump everybody into a single paragraph, because it's really confusing and they need a separate paragraph each e.g.
"...suddenly T.J. stated, "My sire really does care for Amanda."
Sheppard nodded. "I can see that..."
There are some other minor issues with the way you write dialogue too, which can all be dealt with by a decent beta reader.
As for PoV, well... that's a much tougher concept to get right, but I'll have a stab at explaining. When you write a character, first (as here) or third person, keep with it, and don't write another character as if you're watching the scene from inside their head. Only one person is capable of seeing a scene from that perspective, and it's the person you're writing at that moment. If you change PoV because the story calls for it, then show that by placing a line in the chapter, or asterisks, elipses a row of 'o'.
Another area I noticed needing tightening was tense. I wasn't certain whether you wrote in the present or the past, so that's another thing that needs a tweak.
But, for all that, a sweet little story, and I hope you find a beta who can thrash your work into order.
| dragonsdaughter1 chapter 12 . 8/23/2013
Please write a sequel!
| Karon Dethe chapter 12 . 6/3/2013
Oh, the pain and the joy ;) Really good story... now where is that sequel?
| HiveQueen chapter 12 . 12/1/2012
I started the sequel :)
| SaskiaWillow1201 chapter 12 . 11/18/2012
Omg that was good really good, you should get started on that sequel
| diama56 chapter 12 . 11/18/2012
Ahhhhhh I am so glad to hear there will be a sequel!
Amanda deserved Todd and all is well since we always love a happy (and loving) ending, even if it's about a wraith and a human! :)
| SaskiaWillow1201 chapter 11 . 11/16/2012
Ahhhhhhhhhh...omg do another one reall really soon pls
| diama56 chapter 1 . 11/16/2012
Ohhhhhhhh I almost cry a this end (just hoping it is not really the end, though!
It is exactly how I saw Todd and Amanda being reunited at the end... :)
| saskiawillow1201 chapter 10 . 11/8/2012
nawww i cant wait till you do the next chapter its really good
| SaskiaWillow1201 chapter 10 . 11/9/2012
So far, I can't wait till you write another story, very good, pls update really really soon!
| diama56 chapter 10 . 11/8/2012
Wow...that was moving!
I just need a rectification, cause I might be wrong, but you said: "I looked down and saw I was in my Atlantis uniform."
To me, it would be normal that she wore a kind of infirmary clothe or something like that, since she is in a bed of the infirmary in isolation room, not in her uniform...unless it's a vision of her (Amanda) who got to Amelia Banks?
| HiveQueen chapter 10 . 11/8/2012
After this story is done, I will probably be either righting a crossover sequel to this story or the history of Todd's son. Message me any ideas about which one you prefer! Thanks!
| river.the.parrot chapter 9 . 11/7/2012
Im glad you didnt kill todds son... but now you got to write a story about his capture and stay with his replicator masters that lasted since the fall of the ancients...thats a long time
| Guide chapter 10 . 11/8/2012
OMG, Amanda is going to make it,John now knows that Todd cares about her and Todd is on his way! Love the story so far it's fantastic.
Just love anything to do with Todd the very sexy wraith...I wonder what will happen next, on the edge of my seat so please update soon.